Lost all emotions after breaking free of ego

Profile photo of Gava Sky Gava Sky (@gtur13) 5 years, 7 months ago

I know this may seem crazy in a way, but I feel like I am becoming completely un-emotionally attached toward the world. When I was younger I used to get really emotional about everything, even fed up on the littlest things. I was always afraid of how people perceived me and thus would try to act to find the best role possible.

Recently, after breaking free of my ego, I have become honest with the world and most definitely myself. Yet, I recognized that pretty much all my emotions had been killed off. It is almost as if I am constantly living in the moment and I forgot how to think about the past nor the future.

I don’t know if this is normal. After seeing the movie “Immortals” one particular quote stuck out at me, A man must be in complete control of his emotions.

Well, then; Where am I at? What happened to me? I have so much excitement in my life but I am just not able to feel it?

Does anybody know what I am talking about? Or has anybody had any similar experiences?

April 7, 2012 at 12:10 pm
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Filip (2,819)M (@filipek) 5 years, 7 months ago ago

What do you mean with “breaking free of my ego” ? First of all I cannot imagine breaking free of your ego, since your ego is and always will be part of you, whether you like it or not. Maybe you have accepted to the fullest that the ego is part of you, I can agree with that.
Second of all, please elaborate on how you have ‘lost your emotions’ ? When somebody hurt you, you do not get pain? When you see a funny movie, you are not getting excited/happy? That does not seem normal to me, but I highly doubt you really lost all your emotions.

And I am sorry to say, but the quote really sucks. Emotions come as they are, you should not want to control them (to a certain degree maybe yes, but not completely!)

I honestly do not know what happened to you, you should explain more about your past and how exactly you ‘killed your ego’. How did you ‘break free from your ego’ ?

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Mike Wuest (508) (@mikeyw829) 5 years, 7 months ago ago

how do you know you broke free from your ego? In my experience, as my ego dissipates (or expands.. I don’t really know), I become more in touch with my deepest emotions. I’ve never been so excited actually.

Sounds more like some sort of psychological issue than freedom from ego. Maybe emotional suppression/numbness. If you’re living in the moment, you wouldn’t be thinking about how it’s impossible for you to forget about your past and future. If you are even thinking that, you aren’t living in the moment and are actually thinking about the past just by thinking that thought.

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Mike Wuest (508) (@mikeyw829) 5 years, 7 months ago ago

Do you feel disappointed/sad that you can’t feel any emotions? Do you worry about it? Why are you posting about it if you don’t have any feeling (negative or positive) toward it? Because that is an emotion itself.

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Gava Sky (126) (@gtur13) 5 years, 7 months ago ago

lol I feel like we are not on the same page.

I don’t mean that I broke free of my ego, I just explained it incorrectly. What I think is that I have almost completely become in control/aware or whatever you want to call if of my ego.

And that quote from the movie, I dont even think it was that quote..It was just something that one of the actors said that got me thinking.

Almost everyday I try to get out of my comfort zone. The easiest way for me to do that was by kinda numbing out my emotions. And its almost like numbing out my emotions has become permanent. I cant feel emotions when I win, nor when I lose. And neither when something exciting happens /:

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Gava Sky (126) (@gtur13) 5 years, 7 months ago ago

I am worried about it..but it is almost as if at the same time I completely became not caring about ANYTHING.

Maybe its the teenage years haha?

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Martijn Schirp (112,735)A (@martijn) 5 years, 7 months ago ago

It makes me think of this: http://www.buddhistgeeks.com/2011/07/bg-225-the-end-of-self-referencing/

Does it sound familiar?

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Mike Wuest (508) (@mikeyw829) 5 years, 7 months ago ago

I’ve done this a lot and I actually know what you mean. You surge past the fear, and try not to even feel it or think about it. Instead of shrinking back and hiding, you break past the fear to the point where you actually suppress it. At least that’s what happens in my experience. For me I try to stay just out of my comfort zone (as opposed to blowing way beyond it), so I still feel the fear/anxiety, not to the point where I’m numb to it, but to where I feel it fully and can eventually release it. Of course it’s easier to numb yourself emotionally. but that’s not where the real transformation happens.

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Gava Sky (126) (@gtur13) 5 years, 7 months ago ago

“So that’s an example of how things change. And as you might imagine, as you go across that continuum you see what you would sort of expect in terms of a progression from one of those extremes to the other one of those extremes. And we can talk about the same sort of changes. There’s changes that are very similar for emotion at the end of the spectrum. People basically represent that they do not experience emotion ever. Now that sounds like terrible like it would be some automaton type existence but in fact no one wants to go back. Whatever that’s like not to experience emotion, it’s better than what came before it. And lots of times there was a progression into it and what came before it was pretty darn amazing compared to what came before that. So whatever that is to not have emotion, to be on sort of the far end there, you still have a tremendous sense of well being. It’s just not an emotional sense of well being. So people don’t represent for instance having love. If you say do you have love. They’d say “no I don’t have any love.” And that’s true for even things like their kids. They don’t have fatherly or motherly love for their children even anymore. So those sorts of extreme forms of love that people maybe can’t imagine not being a part of their life literally there’s no experience of them.

Now when we measure their body, we do measure sort of the same type of physiological responses that you would measure in people that had emotion. So it’s interesting because there does appear to be sort of what you would think of measurable emotional response in the body but there’s no experience of it.” WOW
http://www.buddhistgeeks.com/2011/07/bg-225-the-end-of-self-referencing/

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Gava Sky (126) (@gtur13) 5 years, 7 months ago ago

@martijn, thank you!

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Uncle Myu (38) (@wizster) 5 years, 7 months ago ago

@gtur13, be wary. don’t speak in such definite terms. we never stop growing. complacence begets stagnance. this may just be a phase. i recommend you try not to allow this current trait to define you so. allow it to flow through you and remind yourself that no form or mindset you attain in this life is permanent; ergo, it cannot be so definitive. peace and love.

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James (18) (@jameslarson13) 5 years, 7 months ago ago

Does it upset you that you can not feel excited?

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zyro (3) (@zyro) 5 years, 7 months ago ago

I’m not sure if this is what your talking about, but I had a very strange experience once. After a very negative drug experience and no sleep for a multiple days, my mindset and perception of the world changed so drastically. I felt like I had to emotion, however, this was the opposite of living in the moment. Its like I had to think about how to react for everything, NOTHING came natural. Conversation was a daunting task, and I went from being one of the most talkative kids to never saying a word. I felt like I had to think, “Oh respond postivley with a smile to this statement.” It was horrible. I always had a glassy stare on my face and didn’t feel connected to reality at all. I recovered eventually but man oh man did it suck.

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Yamnamg (0) (@Gmanmay00@gmail.com) 1 year, 11 months ago ago

This is exactly how i feel and was almost my exact experience. Do you know how you recovered or if you did anything specific To make it happen? Any habits you broke that seemed to make you feel ebtter?

I have been feeling like this feelings never going to leave me and i would appreciate any advice

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Nick (195) (@nickc2007) 5 years, 7 months ago ago

Sounds like you’re worried about having lost your emotions…which will be from your ego. I don’t recall anyone who’s enlightened ever complaining about it, don’t think that ego’s really gone.

Maybe your just in a state of apathy + acceptance. I’ve been there, where good or bad, things don’t desperately seem to affect you. It ain’t quite ego death though.

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R.V. Star (151) (@rickvonstar) 5 years, 7 months ago ago

have you considered that perhaps a lot of emotions are pointless reactions of your organism to things its been conditioned to feel emotions towards?

maybe the reason you aren’t feeling emotions is because you’ve subconsciously realized that most the stuff you felt emotions about were bullshit

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Mike Wuest (508) (@mikeyw829) 5 years, 7 months ago ago

No emotions are bullshit. If you have emotions toward something, you shouldn’t tell yourself that they’re bullshit. Feel what you feel and accept it without trying to deny. If someone puts you down, and you get mad about it, don’t tell yourself, “oh I shouldn’t be having this emotion, it’s not real and it’s pointless.” Because in the end, you still subconsciously feel that emotion you are trying to pretend you don’t have. That’s called suppression, and leads to emotional numbness and indifference, which is a lot different than ‘transcending your ego’ (or whatever you personally like to call it).

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Yamnamg (0) (@Gmanmay00@gmail.com) 1 year, 11 months ago ago

I think youre missing the entire point of this. Its not that hes “transcending his ego” or “enlightened”. He is feeling numb and depersonalized, from what i understand. Hes not trying to surpress his emotions or pretend he doesnt have them, becauae he most likely wants to feel them. I cannot speak for him but from personal experience that is at least how i feel. Also, its not that you dont feel emotions at all, because you do, just to a lesser and less personal extent

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R.V. Star (151) (@rickvonstar) 5 years, 7 months ago ago

why would you get mad over some one putting you down? It doesn’t actually affect you and who cares if someone has a different opinion about you? Most people’s opinions are hopelessly misinformed or incomplete anyways

so right there is an example of how previously felt emotions turn in to big “So whats” that you couldn’t care less about

sure, if you feel an emotion go ahead and feel it. I’m not saying to suppress emotion.

but people might want to consider who is really in control. Are you or the emotions that arise in your body in control? I would hope that you dont get senselessly pushed around by emotions that are connected to conditioned bullshit

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Bryan Hellard (302)M (@xyver) 5 years, 7 months ago ago

I’ve had moments where I had to think to myself “I feel like I should be sad/angry right now, but I just don’t feel anything.” There’s been two times recently (but I can’t remember one of them…) that I felt that way. I was thinking of starting a post here about it, but I guess I moved on and forgot.

I definitely still feel happy though, I just don’t get angry and rarely get sad any more. I feel like I should sometimes, but I just don’t. The last time I remember being sad was when my girlfriend was leaving for 3 months, and I thought we were going to break up. And that was back at the end of September…

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Mike Wuest (508) (@mikeyw829) 5 years, 7 months ago ago

@rickvonstar, I was using an example. Why would I get mad at that? I usually don’t, but if I did it would be because I’m subconsciously conditioned to believe people’s opinions of me comprise my self worth. You have to feel the emotion first before you can realize that it doesn’t matter though. You can’t logically tell yourself it’s dumb to get upset about something like that and expect to stop feeling the way you do about a certain issue. That only works on the surface, because underneath your logical argument that it’s senseless to let other people’s opinions bring you down, you still feel hurt/angry or whatever at what the person said, even if you don’t feel the emotion in your conscious mind.

You don’t need to get pushed around by your emotions, but trying to logically tell yourself that the way you feel is dumb and giving yourself reasons why it doesn’t make sense will not truly solve anything in my opinion. It might help on the surface, but from my experience that’s what leads to the emotionally hardened and numb feeling

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R.V. Star (151) (@rickvonstar) 5 years, 7 months ago ago

@mikeyw829, I see what you say. I think its more a realization that cuts off certain emotions related to certain things instead of a logical self talk that causes suppression and insanity

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Will (0) (@will0810) 5 years, 7 months ago ago

A loss of emotions does not necessarily signify some psychological problem. Their are a variety of reasons why someone might consider emotions and their rampant effects more negative than positive (when considered objectively). “Dropping” you’re ego might just be the realization that in the great span that is the universe you are rather insignificant; which is completely rational.

Try reading The Stranger by Camus.

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martouk (64) (@martouk) 1 year, 12 months ago ago

Or try reading Demystifying the Mystical by Endall Beall.

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corey (1) (@neomerlin13) 5 years, 7 months ago ago

When i was younger i had those emotionless states often. It was almost as if i loss all caring about everything. It almost feels like you are on autopilot and the world is gray. There was no excitement, fear, happiness, sadness or anything. Sound remotely like you do @gava

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Jason (111) (@thinknowlivenow) 5 years, 7 months ago ago

I think what is being discussed here is more so the detachment from ego based emotional perceptions, not the faculty of emotion altogether. Emotions are necessary – and vital – for personal progress!

It sounds to me that you are simply becoming more aware of the negative, self-limiting nature of the ego. I too have transcended many of my former emotional anxieties as a result of becoming more and more conscious, and I would assert that this is good, and perhaps even necessary!

The truth is, EMOTION is the fuel for action. If you are fearful, anxious, doubtful and depressed about things, your motivation for action will reflect this. Simply put; you won’t feel much like taking constructive action to better your situation because you allow yourself to become consumed with negative perceptions and emotions, keeping you trapped in a self-reinforcing feedback loop of think negative -> receive negative -> justify negativity -> repeat.

Think about how many people remain trapped by fear, worry and doubt over outcomes, perceptions and opinions. These things ultimately limit and control our ability to progress and grow as human beings because they can heavily influence us from taking the types of actions that could/would change our lives for the better.

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Anonymous (2,833) (@) 5 years, 7 months ago ago

@gtur13, “I have become in control of my ego”

So whats doing the controlling? (Your ego)

You’re just having a period of low emotion. It will come back. In weeks, months, or years.

I had this in highschool.

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Anan (9) (@anan) 5 years, 7 months ago ago

I may say that Apathy has very much to do with the description of your posting Gava Sky, and usually is the EGO what makes as feel EGOLESS. On the other hand APATHY is the basis of depression, you might want to check on that, the silent disease of our civilization and its many ways of expressions.
I profoundly feel that when you are “living in the moment” there is no questionings, if that happens.. then there is the EGO acting again.

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5UNNY5IDEUP (0) (@5UNNY5IDE) 3 years, 2 months ago ago

I know exactly what your going through, is it like your old attatchments have no emotion to them like you have memories of memories and you have no emotional attatchment like you used to, for example you could play your favorite” movie, but it feels like the ol you used to like it now you feel like a new person, almost like a ghost in a shell?? ring a bell?? leme know if im on point

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