Before you let the little gears in your brain kick in and let your thoughts fire into defensive mode.. stop for a while and just listen. I just want to talk and let my thoughts flow through your head.
We are all the same person: one soul, one living thing that has come to experience life as individuals. We believe ourselves to be our bodies because we experience everything through the body. But ponder this: what is the difference between you and I? The color of your hair? The color of my eyes? The pigment of my skin? Your height? My gender?
Or is it beyond physical? What is the difference? Is it because you are Christian? Is it because I am atheist? Is it because you love animals? And I hate them? Or maybe you are a violent individual and I am pacifist? …
Of course all these questions are hypothetical. But they serve my point that we are ultimately the same soul living separate lives. Think of the minuscule differences that separate us. We are all born into this world against our will: given a body, a face, a voice, a mind that is all unique to each one of us. We were each put into certain families with all sorts of differing and similar personalities and we were each faced with unique circumstances and obstacles in life… so what does this all mean?
It means that I am me because of the circumstance I was placed in and the things that were decided for me (physical features, mental capabilities) and ultimately the decisions I made (based on my unique human nature). I would BE you if I were given your circumstances and your body. Down to the last thought. You think the way you do because that is what a person like you would think. We are all the best copies of ourselves.
But what does that mean?… The question remains. But I think the answer is that we must learn to empathize for one another. When you argue, understand that the opposing argument is made by someone who went through a different situation in life and thus causes them to take the stance that best fits them (in the same manner that you feel that your stance best fits you and is also the right stance).
You must understand that you think a certain way because of the things you have gone through and thus your perception of right is your own. Another person has gone through his or her own struggles and has tailored their beliefs according to their experiences.
Next time you get caught up in an argument understand, that ultimately, you are arguing with yourself… not literally, but with another part of yourself. This person has a different and unique experience in life and they are trying to be the most genuine person they can be by expressing their opinion on their own terms. Topics like gun control and abortion for example: may the debates continue so that a unified solution may be created, but do not let anger or other forms of negativity get in the way.
Be more tolerant of people and understand that they are the way they are not because they want to taunt you or anger you with their existence.. but because they are being themselves and sometimes it’s hard to like someone for who they are. You must understand that if you were in their shoes and had their past you may then understand why they think the way they do.
That is all. Thank you for reading.
“You must understand that you think a certain way because of the things you have gone through and thus your perception of right is your own. Another person has gone through his or her own struggles and has tailored their beliefs according to their experiences.”
Thank you for your deep, eloquent thoughts. I can only imagine all the instances in which I felt that when a person I am conversing with begins to disagree with my stance or opinion, they close their mind. Many people shut off and retreat to the safety of their own opinion, as if an opposing or different opinion would lesson the validity of theirs. Both sides of any debate are often valid. When we assert ourselves as subjects in the world, everything we say is in fact valid. It may not be right, but it is a total representation of you. And as you noted, everyone comes from different backgrounds and thus, we are all unique. So too often do I think that people like to act as if their opinion is the end all, be all–the only right in a world of many possibilities. I try to practice seeing from all sides of an issue. Its hard to not let your opinions influence the openness of your mind to possibilities. It is as simple as listening and recognizing another human being. It is not required to agree with someone to recognize them in their subjectivity. So I try to do this whenever I’m talking to someone, and always to assert my subjectivity and my beliefs–knowing that they are mine, they are a result of my past experiences and current situations and that its okay for dissent to happen because of this.
If you truly understand and live by the fact that we are all the same being, it will be impossible for you to ever feel anger toward another human being, because if you understand how truly silly it is to fight with yourself, you won’t partake in it.