Mai Pham • • 6 min read
How to Be Peaceful and Balanced in a World of Chaos
We live in the world of chaos.
Good things happen every day. But so do bad things.
What’s more, we’re addicted to shocking posts. Or maybe it’s a habit. But we cannot stop scrolling down our Facebook page or the reading post after post of celebrities admitting to their abusive or sexual escapades.
Seriously, there is nothing good in them.
Sure, they give you information. Some information you might need before reaching out to a friend and find out she moved out of town couple weeks ago. Or just something to gossip with other people at work so you don’t look like an alien knowing nothing.
But other than that, they are more toxic than they are beneficial.
Our Harmful Addiction
Do you think you are addicted to your phone? Heck, I didn’t think I was. Not until I listened to Simon Sinek’s famous TED talk, in which, he mentioned:
“If your phone is the last thing you see before going to bed, you might be addicted. If you check your phone first thing in the morning before you kiss your wife, you might be addicted.”
Say no more. Those two, I have two checks already. Not to mention other times during the day that I check my phone.
I spend at least 2 hours a day just looking and reading on my phone. No, I didn’t read the news and check my Facebook 2 hours non-stop, but I manage to sneak in 5 minutes here and there.
Walking from the parking to the office? I hold my phone in my hand.
Going to the bathroom? The phone was inside my pocket.
Waiting in line? What else is there to do other than look at your phone?
Normally, after couple hours using my phone, I never feel better about myself or learn something new. Instead, here are 4 things that I do, and I believe I’m not alone in this.
We Compare Ourselves With Others
We are bombarded with life stories. Or a sneak peek of people’s perfect lives. They seem to have figured their lives out, they seem to have everything so easily.
On the other hand, we are struggling day to day through our lives. We have relationship problems, money problems, and self-worth problems.
It makes us wonder that if they can do it so easily, what are we doing with our lives?
Seeing strangers living their extraordinary lives is one thing, seeing our friends do it on Facebook is even worse.
Have you ever wondered what they do to get so rich, to be able to afford that trip, that car, that house and stay fit, stay in a relationship or being admirably single?
We used to know them. We all started in the same place. What happened?
The more we scroll down on Facebook to check out what our friends are doing, the less self-worth we feel and the worse we feel about ourselves.
We Let Negative Energy Sneak Into Our Lives
It seems that sitting on the sidelines and watching other people’s lives won’t help us. What about watching something else’s life being ruined? Will it make us feel alive and happier?
That’s a big no-no.
When we read some horrible, shocking news, we often feel for the victims. We feel bad for them. We empathize. And once we feel bad, we let the negative energy sneak into our lives.
We Attract Negativity
As Bob Doyle stated in The Secret,
“the law of attraction doesn’t care whether you perceive something to be good or bad, or whether you don’t want it or whether you do want it. It’s responding to your thought”, and, “That’s what you’re going to get more of.”
Once you allow negativity to sneak into your lives, it doesn’t matter if the negativity is from your own thought, or other people’s thoughts, you are going to get more of it.
We Waste Time and Energy
You are busy. We all are.
Some people work up to 16 hours a day. And we barely get enough sleep.
We constantly complain that we don’t get enough rest. We search endlessly for time management and productivity hacks to improve our work so we can rest more.
But instead of spending those spare time to rest, we waste it on the world’s chaos — I call it “trash”.
Instead of thinking or planning your next move in your career, you spend your mental energy consuming trash. Instead of acknowledging your feelings and emotions, we let that chaos blow us away and leave a numb zombie behind.
Detox Chaos From Your Life
You know that shocking news and constant Facebook notifications don’t do you any good. But still, it is inevitable. Sometimes you need to get updated on what’s going on in the world. Or you simply want to be informed. Nothing wrong with that.
It doesn’t mean you have to live in chaos forever. You can still create a chaos-free environment to reclaim your inner peace while updating with the most important stuff out there.
Set Up a Peaceful, Distraction-Free Time
We need more quiet time than ever before. To detox all the chaos in your life, you need to block time for yourself. No phone, no TV, no internet. Just you. Doing whatever you like.
You want to enjoy a cup of coffee while reading the news? How about we remove the news, and just you enjoy your coffee?
While drinking your coffee, stop thinking about your to-do list. Instead, feel the heat of the cup in your palms, feel the taste of the coffee and feel it when it runs down your stomach.
Acknowledge what you do. Be present.
Morning Meditation
Meditation is the greatest method of all. It helps you to connect to your inner-self, helps to reduce stress and to gain balance. All the affirmations work best when they are combined with a meditation session.
Don’t worry if you cannot sit still for hours and meditate. You will reap the benefit of meditation if you just try a couple minutes each day.
The book “8 Minute Meditation” is the great book to start. In fact, I was postponing my meditation practice until I read that book.
Set Up a Time to Check News and Media Channels
If you must check the news and read all the notifications on Facebook, you can. But you cannot just do it whenever you want or whenever you have free time.
If this is an unavoidable task, so be it.
Block time for checking news and reading all the posts on Facebook and new tweets on Twitter or whatever other channels you are following. This way, not only you are aware of how much time those things consume, but you also limit the impact they have on you.
Curate Your TV Channels
What’s more appealing than going back home from a long day at work, then sitting in front of your TV and watching your favorite shows?
I know it is fun. And it sounds relaxing. But sometimes it isn’t. It really depends on what shows you watch.
We try to avoid drama in our lives. But at the end of the day, we just want to watch more dramas.
“They are not real,” I hear you saying.
But they attack your emotions. That’s why they are good. You watch them, you listen to them, you follow their stories and you empathize with them. And you take on their emotions, all the good and the bad.
I’m not saying you have to say no to your TV. But you can select the show that will nurture your emotions and release some good out to the world. Or if you must watch those shows, make sure you block time for them too and don’t watch more than your block.
You Can be Peaceful and Balanced
It’s the morning. You wake up and instead of jumping to check emails, reading your friend’s latest posts, you just stay still in your bed for a minute.
You slowly get up, walk barefoot to the kitchen and make yourself a cup of coffee.
You sit down with a warm cup of coffee in your hands. It smells good. You take sips. One by one. Until the last drop.
You are completely awake now. You close your eyes and start meditating.
You focus on your breath. And nothing else matters.
And hey, this happens in a modern world, in a crowded city, not in a jungle or on top of a mountain.
Sounds good?
It’s possible. Detox your life today. Cultivate order in the chaos.