Reply To: To love and lose or to never have loved at all?

New Home Forums Social To love and lose or to never have loved at all? Reply To: To love and lose or to never have loved at all?

Author Replies
Rachel # Posted on December 13, 2011 at 7:28 pm

Pain, rejection, and lonliness are not inherent traits of love and relationships, but they are possible risks that we take when we open ourselves up to another person fully. To experience the joy of being fully known and accepted by another, we must make ourselves vulnerable and risk rejection. Still, having felt both the pain of rejection and the joy of a full and committed love where I am truly known and accepted, I personally would never give up the latter for protection from the former.

I would worry that you are giving up a chance at a an unknown joy because of a risk which you do know well. Only *you yourself* can do the risk-benefit calculation and decide for yourself what you consider “worth it”. I have good friends who have decided that their lifestyles are too independent to tie themselves down to a single person for life, despite the possible benefits of longterm committed partnership. That has not been my choice, but I respect that it is theirs.