Reply To: What is True Love?

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Jeremy # Posted on December 14, 2011 at 5:54 am

@Nicole I have not read it, but the fact that you bring it up makes me curious enough to do so. Care to elaborate?

I totally agree with your definition. I think love is when you would put the other person before yourself in all situations. But, I think TRUE love is when that feeling is reciprocated, therefore creating one out of two people. I don’t necessarily feel that that is healthy in a dependent way, but rather, in a desiring way… if that makes sense.

Thank you! And thank you for your thought. I think this is a very good point you bring up. I agree that there certainly is a honeymoon period where everything feels new and amazing, and that the commitment afterward is, in terms of the relationship, far more important than that initial feeling. I think since I wrote that post, I have come to understand what I meant better. I think that for love to be true is must exist in some consistent state. That’s not to say that it always FEELS the same, but that it is a constant in itself. Just like how water may sometimes be moving quickly or slowly, but it still remains a liquid.

I think craving the honeymoon feeling “back” in itself is a problem. If we only desire food for its taste, then it is likely that we will want more of it until our body cannot take any more… unhealthy. But if we desire food for the nutrients it brings us and our body, then we are satisfied with what we have no matter what, and the taste is a bonus… healthy. So I feel like as long as both partners are committed to healthiness in their relationship, in that they desire the other person for the great things that they bring them, then the honeymoon phase ending does not have to be an end.

I REALLY like that theory you have there. I feel like there is DEFINITELY some validity in it. To prove so, I’ll tell you a quick story. A couple months ago, since my girlfriend and I both enjoy writing, we decided to write a little book (just for us) about our relationship from each of our perspectives. Currently I live in Korea and she lives in America, so we are in opposite timezones. After she had gone to sleep, I went to a coffee shop to do some writing. Here is a quote, “…As I walked through the door, the butterflies in my stomach slowly died. Floating like one, I walked around the room introducing myself…” NOW, the crazy part is, the next morning for her (late that night for me) she woke up and told me that she had a strange dream. So I asked her, “What was it about?” She said, “I don’t really know.. it was weird.. you were comparing yourself to a butterfly.”

Since then, this has happen a couple other times, but in less obvious ways. Also, I just watched this video and it talks about some very similar stuff ina more scientific way