Reply To: Be yourself, be free

New Home Forums Social Be yourself, be free Reply To: Be yourself, be free

Author Replies
Marie # Posted on August 28, 2012 at 4:08 am

For the majority of my young life I have listened to what negative things others would say about me, and I have believed it, even worshipped it. I have been wrapped up in my own “reality”. I have made myself a victim, and hidden away from my life. I have tried in vain to control my own existence so as not to get hurt. I have tried to prepare for every kind of experience, so as to not get mentally or physically wounded, and this has kept me from doing what I really wanted to do, and kept me from the core of existence which is to experience new things with an open mind. I have been more dead than alive. More ignorant than happy. I have been narrow-minded. I have been overly sensitive. I haven’t been able to realize how to be happy, how to create my own bliss. I have let other people lead me in directions and not taken control of my own life. I have tried to blame others for my misery. I have not valued my own life. I have been so angry with myself, life, others. Because I didn’t understand and I was scared. I have been in the prison that is my mind in the state it is in when I have been alone for too long. After realizing this, I have become open. I trust my own instict, judgement, myself. I am more able to see other people’s point of view, and realize when I am being unfair to myself. I am now able to receive love and support from others, and not push it away. I haven’t felt like I deserve love, and it always seemed to me others were so much happier than me. I could not understand why I wasn’t happy. I have been trapped within myself. I was so fragile, and I let other people’s insecurities affect me, so I withdrew into myself for many years. I love my ego now, because it makes me more of a resource instead of the burden I used to feel like. I love myself, and I love others, and I am no longer afraid of the things that used to keep my trapped. :) To conclude: I haven’t been able to understand others because I haven’t been able to understand myself. Wow, feels good to share. Thanks.