A girl and a boy being bestfriends?

 246the (@246the)6 years, 8 months ago

I had a discussion with my friend the other day about if two person with different genders could be bestfriends without it becoming more than bestfriends. My friend believed that this wasn’t possible because the two of them would know each other so well that one of them would in the end fall in love with the other. It was therefore not possible for a girl and a boy to become bestfriends. She believed that the only way a boy and a girl could become bestfriends was if they thought of each other as siblings. And here comes my question; do you think this is possible or is it as my friends thinks?

June 19, 2014 at 9:10 am
MonkeyZazu (1,865)M (@monkeyzazu) 6 years, 8 months ago ago

Well, if you take into account sexual orientation, that is if they were both homosexual and completely unattracted to the opposite sex, I think it would be possible for them to stay best friends.

It really depends on what your attracted to and what turns you on. If your friend has qualities that you find attractive in a person, then the possibility of the friendship becoming something more somewhere down the line is there, but it’s not 100% certain that it will develop into something more.

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Florence.3 (3) (@Florence.3) 4 years, 5 months ago ago

Yes, agree

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Marlon (97) (@shoeopener) 6 years, 8 months ago ago

What’s the benefit and what are you going to lose exactly if you have all the answers to this question?

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246the (0) (@246the) 6 years, 8 months ago ago

I won´t benefit neither lose anything. It´s just that I want to know what other people would think about this topic.

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Marlon (97) (@shoeopener) 6 years, 8 months ago ago

I think if you believe you won’t lose anything from being best friends with someone then it’s possible.

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Jared.L (3) (@Jared.L) 4 years, 5 months ago ago

I have a female friend since I was at school. I know that she loves me and I do not so w edecided to be just friends. Honestly i think there is no just friendship between sexes. One or another is in love. Always

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Nora (1) (@Noracat) 4 years, 5 months ago ago

You know there are a lot of discussion on this. I personally think that it is definitely possible! As you never know in what person you can find your bestie, a person you are ready to share everything except the bed, well yes, your sibling if you want to call it like that. Someone might tell that in this situation someone is definitely in love with the other, but why not being in love? I love my best friend, I feel like she is my sister I chose and was not obliged with because of the blood relationship. So, why cannot I find a best male friend who I can love as a brother? 

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flower21 (17) (@flower21) 4 years, 5 months ago ago

I belive in friendship between boy and girl. Just friendship and support.

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Caleb P (0) (@cjepicman) 4 years, 5 months ago ago

Love isn’t based entirely on knowing someone else really well. You can love someone you barely know at all, and hate someone you’ve known for a really long time. Also, friendship is a form of love, just not as extreme as romantic love. You don’t have to think of them as a sibling to not be sexually attracted to them, and if you did, you probably wouldn’t get along nearly as well as you do now.

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Florence.3 (3) (@Florence.3) 4 years, 5 months ago ago

Can men and women be just friends? In many cases, the answer is no. Sometimes that is good thing, when both people see friendship as a step to mutually-satisfying love, sex, and/or commitment. At other times, men and women cannot be “just” friends because only one friend desires something more. Those mismatched desires between men and women lead to unequal friend zone situations, where one person’s needs are completely satisfied at the other’s expense. Those unfortunate instances and the frustrations around them are the friendship problems we hear so much about.

Nevertheless, friendship between men and women is not impossible. However, it does require finding someone with friendship goals matching your own. Communicating clearly and leaving when there is not a match is key. Also, if you desire “just friends”, then it may be better to pick only friends who are already in other romantic relationships. That way, you can have a satisfying exchange, a good friend, and no frustration.

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Ryan (0) (@Ryan-Kuka) 4 years, 5 months ago ago

So, I’m a bit of a contradiction. All in all, I think it’s very very very hard for a male and female bestfriend to keep their relationship strictly platonic. With that being said, my best friend in the entire world is female (I’m male) and I love her more than anything, but in a sisterly kind of way. She’s my world, but I couldn’t imagine anything with her. However, our friendship only started because we were attracted to each other and my friend didn’t want me to sleep with her haha. Funny how things work out huh?

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Rising (3) (@Rising) 4 years, 5 months ago ago

It can be a tricky question. As long as most aspects of the friendship are clear there won’t be room for ambigiuity. There’s often misunderstanding that stems from assumptions that were made by either side.

I can think of Forest Gump being a good example of a childhood frendship between two individuals of opposite sexes that turned into more than simply being “friends”.

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Grove (0) (@Grove) 4 years, 4 months ago ago

If the boy is gay then it is possible to be best friends.

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Juanchoux (2) (@Juanchoux) 4 years, 4 months ago ago

If there is no physical attraction on either side it would be great!

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Di (0) (@Di-MT) 4 years, 4 months ago ago

Depends on how quickly you solve the “elephant in the room”. Chances are a boy girl being best friends is a bit like crossing a minefield to get to a pot of gold. It’s tricky and you risk a lot of hurt, but it’s so worth it if you make it. It just takes a lot of patience and a thick skin… My history with my bestfriend is a tad odd (we met as each other’s one night stand), but the result was a beautiful friendship worth all the fight, that’s still going. 

I think that ruling out the “I wonder how he/she looks like naked” actually helps if you’re the type of person to tolerate sleeping with someone with no strings attached. 

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