Is Weed and Alcohol mostly used just to fill the empty void of happiness?
Like, recently I have been going through this phase of when it comes to having nothing to do over a period of more than roughly two days, I turn to Weed or Alcohol. I tend to decide which based on whether I feel like keeping my body healthy or not, for example, weed keeps me feeling healthy as I like to work out and stuff, but slows my ability to read. Whereas alcohol basically destroys my body but keeps me on ball, especially when hung over, when I’m hung over I feel like I can steady myself to understand anything no matter how boring . . . . I just ‘dig it’. It could be like 1 single equation and ill literally spend the entire day studying and thinking about it.
Anyway, its an empty void I seem to be filling when it comes to deciding on either. Most normally its because I’m lonely, or sad, or bored to a point of depression. It gives me some sort of satisfaction, like it fills me up inside and stops me thinking of what I’m missing that the rest of the world has.
I’m starting to come to terms that this might not be healthy, or am I over worried?
It happens maybe twice a week on average now.
First, I think it’s wonderful that you’re thinking about it on this level: the level of “This feels good, but is it REALLY good?” That is a level many people never achieve, unless they are forced into it by an experience of “rock bottom.”
And, your awareness that you seem to be “filling a void” is very keen as well. Again, in my experience, most people are not so self-aware. Most of all, I like your observation that ‘it (weed/alcohol) … stops me thinking of what I’m missing that the rest of the world has.”
Why do you have a void that needs to be filled? The Void is a creation of your Mind, and is the very foundation of your Ego. If there were no void to fill, your ego would cease to exist.
That you have managed to identify this already means that you are very close to overcoming it.
The Truth is that the Void only exists in your mind (as does the Ego). But there is more to You than merely Your Mind.
Personally, I don’t see drugs like weed or alcohol (or any other) as being problems for anyone. An “alcoholic” has a problem, sure, but that problem is not alcohol. Alcohol is, in fact, the alcoholic’s go-to solution. What is the problem for which alcohol is his solution? That problem, you could say, is his Ego – his sense of separateness. Or, you could say that it is his Void – his inescapable feeling of lack, which is inter-dependent with his Ego. Alcohol makes him feel, for a time, that the Void has been filled – this is what is so attractive to him about alcohol, and that is why I say that alcohol is not his problem, but rather his solution.
The problem which you are experiencing is this same problem which I’ve just described. On some level, I think, you must already be aware of what I’m telling you. If you were not aware of it, you would not be concerned about it, and so you would not have started this discussion.
My advice to you is to keep studying that problem: that Void that you described, which is part of your Ego. I would say don’t worry so much about the substances, unless they are causing serious harm to you or others around you.
However, with that I would add a word of caution: use of these (or any other) substances for the purpose of “filling the void” constitutes avoidance of the real problem, which is the sense that you have a void that begs to be filled. That’s OK on occasion, but if you make it into a part of your identity and/or way of life, then you will effectively be running away from the problem; running away from your Ego, which ultimately cannot be outrun. This is setting yourself up for potentially years of fear and suffering.
But, again, as long as you take some time to (soberly!) study and face the REAL problem; as long as you aren’t depending on these substances to be your solution, you should be fine just enjoying them on occasion. Just don’t do anything that will cause you or someone else to suffer.
To aid in your continued study of this problem, I strongly recommend the book The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle. I’ll get you an electronic copy if you like, simply PM me.
I also recommend meditation, pure and simple.
Peace my friend.
Thankyou my friend. You strike me as a very perceptive person. I’m very happy and very appreciating of your reply.
I have actually been looking into transcendental meditation recently, it strikes me as a very logical type of thing to do really, which is what suprises me as I always used to dismiss meditation as being a bit you know guru magic sort of thing you know.
Again, I love your reply.
Such positive reinforcement, I have taken note of the book, to be honest it sounds like one I might purchase a hard copy of for a garden read!!!
If you say it could help in my new quest I absolutely believe it will,
and by the way, it is now a quest, thanks to you.
I believe this is one big step forward for my very being.
The world really does have such a lot of good to give. I love that.
Transcendental meditator here. I took a 3 day class to learn, definitely not necessary but I’m glad I did. I’ve been doing it off and on for a while. I haven’t gotten too much out of it but I haven’t done it consistently for a sustained period of time. So many people love it, it’s worth a try. BTW does my lack of commitment ring any bells? You commented on one of my other posts and we’re basically the same person. I replied to your comment, check it out :)
Thank you for your kind words! :D I’m so glad I was able to contribute.
I chuckled at your second paragraph – the one about transcendental meditation – because I too used to view it as a pseudo-magical practice, like those hilarious pranksters who claim they can speak with the dead or whatever. But when I started really learning about it, and tried it for myself… Well, the proof, as they say, is in the pudding.
May your quest be joyful and fulfilling!
Its a good question, very nice that you had the chance to come to it.
You are on to something very important. In my understanding, weed and alcohol, or any kind of neurotic activity or addiction, keeps you running in the circle. once you reach a point where deeper understanding becomes possible you turn to them, your wrong friends. because they promise you an escape, which is not an escape. they are pushing you back into the circle stronger and stronger and you might not be able to see the circle anymore. so whenevery hard feelings, bad feelings come up, it is because they are real, they show themselves to you so that you can work on them and hopefully let them go someday. all addictive activity is geared towards running away from that reality. If you are brave to face everything that comes up (which is what pure meditation is, just observing) you will see that nothing can stay. everything will have to go. everything which has kept you running all this time will dissappear, because it was in the first place caused by running away (not accepting the reality as it is). its hard to get out of the circle and it might take a few trials before you can successfiully do it, but thats all we can do: try as hard as you can to face life in a sober way. and it wil be hard at the beginning but the reward will be infinite! dont run away, accept your lonleyness, your sadness, your boredom, stay with this feelings in quietude. i would recommend to seek a meditation master, most of us need someone to help us out, and give us the extra motivation and direction. GOOD LUCK!
You have given me the understanding that I face a real challenge,
I have taken from it that this is a form of pure meditation, to attempt to face this void head on.
And that if I fail to see at first I should keep at it.
So much positive reinforcement here, I love it. Thanksyou so so much.
I will give it everything I can in mind body and soul!
awesome! its taken me 10 years to overcome deep confusion about myself, mostly reinforced by wrong ideals and ideas about happiness. i spent alot of time alone, and tried to fight my inner thirst for the negative. i am glad that i finally succeeded, mostly thanks to opening up to other people, spirituatl practices (you should try some reiki or pranic healing, it has worked wonders for me and given me alot of strenght to dig deeper in meditation). go for it brother! A wise person once said: its better failing at the real stuff then making achievements at the wrong stuff. With right i mean achieving that inner peace and the way to finding the solution in yourself, not by means fo changing the outside world. By wrong he means, to continue running in the circle and play the game that is praised by society, but which will not bring peace and happiness to you. Good luck brother!
“… in my experience, most people are not so self-aware” – What does it mean to be ‘self’ aware, what is self? Perhaps the illusion of separation, the misidentification of ‘self’ as the ego. Thus this separation is the feeling of ” …normally its because I’m lonely, or sad, or bored to a point of depression. It gives me some sort of satisfaction, like it fills me up inside and stops me thinking of what I’m missing that the rest of the world has.” – As within so without. Love within and your vibration will be mirrored.
“The Void is a creation of your Mind, and is the very foundation of your Ego. If there were no void to fill, your ego would cease to exist.” – If you shift your identification with ego and realize that ego is vital as the engine in the car. Understand that your ego is your friend. Yet not the decider of your destination. That is love, – if thats what you decide it to be. Love comes through the heart. ego is in the head. Be aware of where you have your focus. Feelings of love are in the now. the mind is stuck in time stuck with the body.
“… nothing to do over a period of more than roughly two days” What excites you?
“I’m starting to come to terms that this might not be healthy, or am I over worried?” – Rather on the contrary, this is very healthy, if you decide it to be so. Perhaps posting here on HE is the result of that thought appearing in your mind and thus for you to realize that there is perhaps more exciting things in life than ‘weed/alcohol’. If what you are doing is returning to something you feel secure doing ‘weed/alcohol’. when you feel separation from love. The you are repeating a pattern in your life. An escape pattern created by the mind, for the mind.
We are born into this world, open absorbing life in the now with the beautiful loving (!) childish attitude towards change in the now, unpredictability. To streamline the process of processing information we learn for example that ‘chair’ can be used in a few different ways and so perhaps never see a ‘chair’ with new/fresh eyes ‘what can I do with this awesome creation, sit on it, upside down?’
The ego when in control sometimes tries to create an identification ‘I´m a person who never does this or has always done that’ so as to make one stagnant and repeat patterns. (never? -up until now I have chosen not to, how it is in the future or in a moment I do not know)
Love yourself for being aware of this, happiness is an understanding of, and attitude towards the now, towards change.
You thought you perhaps where over worried I think this to be the case.
If an artist for example smokes weed to relax his/her vibration and thus be able to express more creatively (through trying both smoking and not smoking) then it is a conscious decision for a conscious reason.
Who are you, what (!) are you, what’s important to you, why are you here, having this experience of asking your’self’ these questions? Ask yourself these questions and then when you begin to find out, if you require ‘weer/alcohol’. to more smoothly help you reach those insights then so be it. This time its you deciding, not just a pattern of escape created temporarily in the mind. – fear of change, for the mind.
I cannot give you self confidence to begin with change, that would be me trying to tell you what to do, you letting yourself unquestioningly follow – religion for example.
Instead. Turn inwards and learn to love, meditate on the phrase ‘I am!’ while driving, while dreaming, while closing your eyes or while you are partaking in a ego shattering ayahuasca experience in different out-of-body dimensions. I am is always constant – Love.
Keep smiling / Fynn <3
“Every time you are tempted to react in the same old way, ask if you want to be a prisoner of the past or a pioneer of the future.” ― Deepak Chopra
What a prolific discussion this has turned out to be!
@fynnjackson I can’t tell if you’re trying to address me or the OP when you say that “ego is as vital as the engine” etc. I don’t want to turn this discussion into being about me, but I do want to discuss this and I found your words to be very insightful, and even provide a near-answer to a question I’ve been wondering about for a while now. Let’s get together over a PM.
Also, have you read “The Power of Now”? Because with your diction, you sound almost like Eckhart himself.
@thebigelectron It was more of a thought provoking continuation! Together we are as strongest! Yes brother, read it a few years back. Its a fun start but trust me, its only a peak through the door. Message me the question you’ve always been wondering about and I´ll let my brain loose on it! Message conversation sounds good! To be continued… 1 <3