This is a recent topic that has been on my mind for some time now, and honestly it bothers me. Is the statement, “people never change” true? If it is true, I feel I would not accept it with open arms – it’s hopeless and empty to me. Then, there are people and experiences where I witness people changing, especially myself. Change is inevitable. But when the expression “people never change” comes around, I feel as if lessons people learn in life are just cover-ups; they’re something to help tell people “don’t be this way around these people, be this way around these people” – like these lessons being learned are just a way of hiding your true self in order to conform
to others who clash with you.
So will I never truly change? Will I just keep piling conformities to help me handle certain people and situations? Or will I actually change, becoming better and newer self?
Not sure how old you are, but the older you get, the more you realize who your true self is and then you will be that self around everyone not giving a shit because that’s who you are. “People never change” is a stupid statement, people change everyday, when they find something that doesn’t work, they change it and do something different. When I was 16 I used to listen to straight rap and now I listen to indie rock and all sorts of different music. You learn to deal with other people in a way so that they can accept who you are or fuck off, which is a proper ultimatum because why be around someone who doesn’t accept who you are?
Hey Tanios, thanks for your reply. I’m 20 years old, so I’m going through ping-pong thoughts trying to figure out who I am and how I want to be/be seen, all that junk. I’m slowly figuring out who I am and trying to accept myself. It’s almost like I’m on the outside looking in – sometimes I get angry for the way that I am (in certain scenarios) so I ask myself if I should change or should is this who I am? It’s definitely something that takes time I feel…
The changing of personal deals with time, opportunity and reperquation one face in a day and the believed he has attarched to that moment . So changing can come to different people at different time . some will be changing from conformity to innovitive I.e vizer- vee. According to situation.
People don’t change. You always disagreeing with it proves it.
Seriously? If you’re happy with your life and your relationships you would want to change? The only reason you’re bothered is because you need something to change. People don’t change for things they don’t love, they only aspire to remember what they love most. So fucking complicated.
I would say everyone has a core self that is associated with nothing other than the smile they feel in their whole body from the time they are very young. Somehow that is real enough to be and feel like an individuality that is constant. That smile blooms significantly every few years or so and people may say you have changed but they really mean you became even more you.
But I guess its not always a smile. Whatever illumination you know inside you is your core self that never changes
The thing is you can never trust people will change beyond wanting them to and doing what you can to help them without bringing yourself down. We are defined by our habits and words are cheap. The old adage, “Actions speak louder than words,” couldn’t be more true. Most people are all talk and you should never trust words alone. Coming from car sales I knew I didn’t have a sale til they signed the dotted line. They could tell me they loved me and would be back later to buy the car but I learned I didn’t have shit til they signed. People lie. A lot. I’m sure you do too. Motives and action are the real indications of change. Therefore to change yourself all you need to do is alter your motives/goals and execute them differently. I think the saying people never change comes from people saying one thing and doing the opposite, if they were demonstrating change with their actions alone there would be no need for the saying as our words wouldn’t write checks we don’t follow through with.
Actions alone have no exaggeration or deception, it is our words about them that do.
I think its a false statement. People are always changing, some just dont realize it until years later. They look back and realize things they did weren’t for the better and over time those habits or whatever changed, went away or became irrelevant. So I believe change is constant in some way or another, its all about whether we are ready to accept it.