i realize this is long and somewhat drawn out, but that is how my experience with the closest thing to pure DMT, ayahuasca, has been. this is also somewhat of a vent for me because i am still processing some of the details myself. but it got me to join the blog!
fyi-i believe DMT is not only released in our brains when we die, but also when we dream, and they say 41 days after conception in a woman’s body (thus the "spirit" part of a fetus). i can’t remember how i first heard about DMT, but after i first heard of it i was in the library (about a year and a half ago) and stumbled upon a book; DMT: The Spirit Molecule. pretty dense and didn’t read it all but it was the scientific approach of some hippie scientists who did all sorts of trials with different amounts and different methods of taking it. oddly enough the scientists had worked out of the university i was attending. it was then i learned about DMT’s role in ayahuasca, a ceremonial tea/sludge made by shamans from plants and vines from the amazon. soon after my health psychology teacher brought in a modern day shaman/minister for a guest lecture. he went on about how ayahuasca cured his severe depression he has suffered from his whole life. you can actually pay to do a legal ceremony with this "church" where they guide you through a healing journey. many have been enlightened with a different perspective on the world, as i think every one is when they do any psychoactive drug, and some cured from physical as well as emotional/ mental dis-eases.
soon after this, a family friend of mine was diagnosed with breast cancer and i found out she had been doing ayahuasca ceremonies as part of her healing plan (which was all natural with herbs). she was healing but there is only so much your body can do against cancer, so she had surgery, we visited soon after to join her in ceremony. beautiful experience; looking back, i wish i had taken more, but it was an amazing body high for a while (after i threw up), some tears of joy and pain, bliss, chanting, amazing music from the shaman (an eye surgeon) and his wife darkness, self evaluation all while many around me were going through their own purging and healing experiences, but i definitely saw and danced with the "mother" who "provides you with what you can handle", which was to rid me of pain at the time. though my boyfriend did a huge dose…and def met some demons, which has made him a better person, but he was very scared for a while,(thought he was going to die, didn’t know if it would end) as much as i tried to warn him i don’t know if he was completely prepared for what he went through.
a month or so after all of this, i found out that a friend who had committed suicide had been part of a group that did monthly ceremonies. and many "blame" the drug directly. there is a part of me that was deeply saddened by this, but i found comfort in knowing that he was on his cosmic journey, enlightened and sped up by ayahuasca, and needed to leave this reality.
unfortunately, the cancer my friend had has spread into her brain. and she has warned us that she "will be leaving". but hearing her speak so positively about her own journey, and knowing that she is ready due to her experiences with the mother, it all seems ok. there is an upcoming ceremony, and i have been debating weather i should make the 6 hour drive to participate, but honestly, as intrigued as i am, it scares the shit out of me as well, and i think one life changing experience is enough for the year, but one day i think i will want to prepare myself to visit "the mother" again, although i know she is now always in me.
wow, glad to share, but that was a lil ridiculous, hope it didn’t bore u all to death
It is relatively easy to make, but hard to get. I helped my friend about 6 months ago with a DMT extraction from Mimosa hostilis root bark. He bought a kilo of it legally from Brazil, and it took us less than a day to do a single “pull”. The more white the crystals are, the more pure they are (in contrast, the more yellow they are, the more plant fats there are present in the crystals).
The only DMT I’ve ever smoked was the DMT him and I extracted. It is best to know exactly where a hallucinogen comes from if you are going to ingest it.
The dimethyltryptamine crystals I smoked were pretty pure. My friend put a pinch of the crystals on top of a small bed of cannabis. He lit the bowl for me, as we both knew in a matter of minutes I wouldn’t physically be able to do it. He put the lighter close to the DMT, but not ON it, as you want to vaporize it, not burn it.
I took one fat rip, held it in for as long as I could, and exhaled. I started hearing a cracking/buzzing/humming that was very ambient and natural somehow. I then started to just feel “weird”. I felt like I was becoming detached from my ego, but my mind was the exact same. I proceeded to rip the bong again (the bong had no water in it, I just needed a pipe that could hold a good amount of smoke). Inhaled, held it in, exhaled. I then started to feel like I knew what was going to happen a fraction of a second before it actually happened; like déjà vu, but way more intense. Everything started to breathe, and colors started lightly pulsing through objects. I was becoming distracted very easily, and needed to take another rip from the bong to have a “breakthrough experience”. I took the last hit somehow, and lay back on the bed before I even exhaled.
With my eyes closed, I exhaled. My realm of thought started to naturally morph into another reality. I was then in a different plane of existence. My mind was the same (rational, coherent), but my environment was like something I had never seen before. I was in an infinite “mindscape” made up of what OUR universe is made up of: energy. This energy was a little different though. I got the impression that it was of a higher vibrational frequency, perhaps higher-dimensional.
Then something seemingly impossible happened, something that most science fiction writers wouldn’t think of: entities started unfolding out of the higher, tucked away dimensions of space I was in. These entities felt very close to me, like family. They were very happy to see me, and were grinning wide. I was not the least bit scared or threatened. Not only did I get positive vibes from these entities, but I had no body in this plane of existence, so I knew nothing could happen to me at this point.
I was staring in utter amazement at these entities/beings. They were human-like, but not Homo sapien. I got the impression that they were relatively small, despite the fact that size was completely subjective. They were made of pure energy, energy that gave off different light. They were every imaginable color at the same time, which made them look blindingly white. There eyes, however, were pitch black. Their bodies seemed to be made of a plasma-like aether, kind of like “energy Jello”.
They were showering me with love. It was a very powerful love, similar to that of motherly love/unconditional love. But it was all nonverbal, all seemingly telepathic. But it WAS coming from them, even though I can’t describe how I know that for certain. I was at peace with everything. I was very comfortable in that plane of existence. All I was, was consciousness. I had no physical body, no worries, no problems. Because of the beauty of everything I had witnessed, I assumed I was dead and experiencing the afterlife. Once I entertained that thought, the entities started to fold back into space.
I then opened my eyes, and was back in normal reality, where my friend was waiting for me. He informed me that 7 minutes had gone by; that seemed about right. I then had to integrate my experience, so I treated it like a dream. I ran through everything as many times as possible in my head; I looked back on every little detail. I realized that what I experienced felt both extremely alien and extremely familiar. I feel like I have been in that plane of existence before, but I cannot recall a single time being there besides my DMT experience. I was left with the impression that the realm I was in is where consciousness resides when we don’t have a physical body. That is where we reside before birth and after death. THAT is why it felt so familiar and so comfortable.
I have a list of things I want to know: 1) what did I look like to THEM, since I had no body? 2) were those beings actually advanced hyper-dimensional hominids, or a figment of my imagination/subconscious? 3) since people all over the world in different cultures experience something similar almost every time, were parts of my experience valid? 4) was it my pineal gland that was doing the seeing? 5) why the fuck is this illegal?
I highly encourage/recommend anyone of sound mind and body to try DMT. Both DMT and LSD have given me a much greater appreciation for this reality we are in. I now value love much more than I used to, and appreciate how relatively calm our reality is compared to how hectic and confusing it COULD be. DMT is the god-tier of psychedelics. I have done psilocybin mushrooms 8 times, salvia divinorum twice, and LSD (acid) twice, and I must say that DMT is by far the most positive and rewarding psychedelic of them all. And I can say that with absolute confidence after doing it only ONCE.
We have been dreaming every single day of our lives since we were born, possibly even before we were born. And it is hypothesized that this chemical, DMT, plays a big role in dreaming. The pineal gland produces melatonin and DMT; melatonin helps us get into the sleep state, and DMT brings us into the dream state. The pineal gland is located in the geometric center of your brain – the most protected part. Our body protects what is important to it’s survival. The heart is protected, the lungs are protected, the brain is protected, and the pineal gland is also protected. By my logic, DMT must be pretty important if the gland that produces it has the prime real estate of the brain.
I have a feeling DMT plays a major role in how we piece together “waking reality”. I imagine the process as such: we have two eyes in the front of our head that are sensitive to photons (elementary particles that are massless, and move at the speed of light, similar to gluons). Our brain needs another organ to perceive non-physical things, such as time or thought. I think that is where the pineal gland comes into play. In reptiles the pineal gland has a cornea and a lens, similar to our eyes. As you know, reptiles dominated this planet before us, long before us. I think our pineal gland evolved, necessarily, to enable us to perceive space-time, and to enable high level thinking. When you close your eyes and visualize something complicated, what do you think is responsible for that? I think it is the pineal gland, and I think it’s using DMT to create the visual aspect of thought. I think that when we smoke DMT, we are perceiving something that we normally cannot perceive. The reason I think this is because different people from different cultures all over the world have similar experiences with DMT: they meet advanced “aliens”/beings/entities in a different dimension that speak nonverbally, and teach us about the universe and about a new type of language. It is either an underlying archetype in the human mind that all of us on Earth have in common that is making us have almost identical trips, OR, these beings are real and are actually trying to further advance us language-wise. It could go either way, but I hope it’s the latter of the two. I hope that DMT is like a chemical space ship in the mind that can allow us to move (mentally, not physically) to different dimensions where different forms of consciousness reside.
Sorry for another long post, but I want to say one last thing to sum this up. When I experienced DMT, and the trip was ending, I opened my eyes. I was not INSTANTLY transported back to this reality. My DMT reality SLOWLY morphed back into this reality. Almost like someone was turning the tuner on my eyes. THAT is why I think DMT plays a role in how we visually experience life. Because our eyes TAKE IN the information, but something has to CREATE the reality. I think that is one of DMT’s purposes.
I highly recommended the book “DMT: The Spirit Molecule” by Rick Strassman. During a five year process he administered approximately 400 doses of DMT to 60 volunteers, the book outlines his endeavors and research. It’s a great read and contains very insightful trip reports by his patients, a .pdf version is easily attainable from most torrent sites..
Also, I’m sure most of you interested in DMT would appreciate Terence Mckenna’s interpretation of a DMT trip, constructed over time through gradual use (around 40 trips), as the trips have a tendency to slip away from your mind much like a dream does.
Excerpt from “DMT Revelations” by Terence Mckenna [above]
“There’s a whole bunch of entities waiting on the other side. They’re like jewelled self-dribbling basketballs[…] these things are saying “Don’t give in to astonishment”, which is exactly what you want to do. You want to go nuts with how crazy this is, and they say “Don’t do that. Pay attention to what we’re doing”.[…] What they’re doing is making objects with their voices, singing structures into existence. They offer things to you, saying “Look at this! Look at this!” and as your attention goes towards these objects you realise that what you’re being shown is impossible. It’s not simply intricate, beautiful and hard to manufacture, it’s impossible to make these things.”
Excerpt from “DMT: the Spirit Molecule” by Rick Strassman
“They had a space ready for me. They weren’t as surprised as I was. It was incredibly un-psychedelic. I was able to pay attention to detail. There was one main creature, and he seemed to be behind it all, overseeing everything.[…] I am so disappointed I didn’t talk to them. I was confused and in awe. I knew that they were preparing me for something. Somehow we had a mission. They had things to show me. But they were waiting for me to acquaint myself with the environment and movement and language of this space.”
I loved reading everyone’s thoughts and experiences. I smoked DMT once, but I don’t think it was any good. After closing my eyes, I saw some bright visuals but that’s about it. I really want to try it again or ayahuasca, but I don’t have any connections.