Feeling less than you're really worth

Dreamsxemptymind (@Dreamsxemptymind) 7 years, 2 months ago

I feel really anxious, sad, worthless, and helpless right now. I might even end up having a panic attack. I just can’t stand where my life is at right now. I’m not very happy with how my job is getting in the way of my life. I work six days a week bussing tables and work 4 doubles out of those days. It’s a very overwhelming feeling to realize how my work is preventing me from seeing my family and friends. I lost a friend back in January, I feel so guilty for not being able to see him more often. Its almost like my work is my life and there’s nothing I can fucking do about it.

Almost like my bosses don’t care about my well being. I end up work 40+ hours a week and during that time I’m in school  struggling to get enough sleep and rest. Giving me no time for my social life. I feel so alone. I feel like everyone else at my work gets more time off than me and I’m just stuck. I can’t even find enough time to look for a different work because I spend all my energy working then, when it comes to my day off I have nothing left, except for a recovery day for working so hard. 

Work is getting in the way of me enjoying my life, horribly. Taking a huge toll on my well-being. I am worth much more than they make me feel. I know I can find a better job out there but this job is like a parasite preventing me from everything. I’m a very good worker. Im just ranting. I just feel like theres no way out.

June 16, 2015 at 8:15 pm
MonkeyZazu (1,865)M (@monkeyzazu) 7 years, 2 months ago ago

I’ve been there. It sucks. It’s sad how some people have to sacrifice their wellbeing just to get by.

If you want things to change then you have to take action. The first step is always the hardest. If I were you, I would go to your bosses and tell them that your overwhelmed right now, and ask them to reduce your hours. If they tell you anything along the lines of no, muster all the energy you can and put it towards finding a new, better job.

http://blog.zerodean.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/10/you-are-not-required-to-set-yourself-on-fire-to-keep-other-people-warm.jpg

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Anonymous (2) (@) 7 years, 2 months ago ago

I don’t think guilt is a deserved emotion. But things you regret can inspire you… Don’t hate yourself ever.  I’m sorry about your feelings of powerlessness. Take it a moment at a time until something presents itself to you as the next step, instinctually.You can’t make a change unless you know you deserve it. 

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Erik (0) (@Erik-Thompson) 7 years, 2 months ago ago
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dCFO (0) (@dCFO) 7 years, 2 months ago ago

Been there, done that.  There’s a cliche somewhere about when the pain of changing is less than the pain of staying put, we will change.  It gets worse: if you are being treated as a commodity, well, in their eyes, you are.  As I was.  And worser and worser: * they * are NOT going to change.  I repeat: been there, done that.  Run.  Insert many expletives here —-> [ ] run.  THEY were not killing me.  I was.  THEY did not force me to show up, day after day after day.  I did that on my own initiative.  I finally had to consciously admit what I already gut-knew: I was waaaaay out of integrity with myself.  There ain’t no shower long enough or hot enough to cleanse that.  Run.  Run to.  There’s a Buddhist thing-y somewhere about right livelihood. Yup.  Run to it.  Work, the right work, with the right people, is laugh and “You want it when?!” and “Outta my way!” and “They pay me to do this?!!!”  Run.  Oh it’s not out there.  You have to make it.  Beats the [more expletives] out of staying put.  

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Heartcomm (2) (@Heartcomm) 7 years, 2 months ago ago

Stay in school so you can get into a job that nurtures your mind.

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kgkicker (3) (@kgkicker) 7 years, 2 months ago ago

Sorry about your frustration. I’ve been there. Read “The 4 hour workweek” when you get a chance – there are some good ideas and methods that could springboard you to having more time.

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