I’ve been having a pretty big problem of late, and I was wondering if perhaps I could get some insight from you guys. I’m a person who has had a varying degree of success with self-improvement – but I’ve sorta come upon a bit of a block. I can’t get out of my own head. I’m almost constantly rating, judging, thinking out about how I should go about something instead of actually doing it. It’s become pretty fierce, and I think it’s some sort of self-sabotage or the like.
It’s getting to the point though where it is seriously effecting my day to day life. Conversations with other people can be difficult, as I’m distracted – and then of course when I become aware of it it only gets worse. I’m finding it more and more difficult to let go, just enjoy the moment, and it seems to me like my inability to do really do that is effecting both me and the people I am surround myself with.
I don’t feel like I am used to having to deal with this level of anxiety, as I’ve generally felt myself to be a fairly relaxed person. These last few months have sort of thrown that out the window though.
Does anyone have any thoughts on this? Perhaps exercises I could do to try to curtail this?
Thank you all in advance.
My opinion/recent thoughts on this- Self improvement goals can keep you grasping, uncomfortable with the moment. It’s egotistical to need it so much. Work is necessary but the outcome shouldn’t be thought of. In most cases the way you go about something isn’t as important as just setting out with the intention. There is no definite way to success, and success is overrated. Acceptance and engagement are enough.
You’re probably focusing on the perfecting part of self-improvement. On hard work rather than smart work. Not being able to relax is counterproductive, not being able to have fun, to actually enjoy yourself or in extreme cases not feeling rewarded at all. I used to feel that way when I had deadlines. I was giving them more importance than I should have, and after those deadlines passed I was still going with the same rhythm even though they were over. I was pressured by something that wasn’t even my idea. *I was like the stupid people I hate.* The expectation of it to happen again made me take control of myself so what I did was have fun instead. I was ‘out of my head’ to let external factors influence me. The action I took was just being absolutely sure that I’m not having more of this nonsense so I technically destroyed it for healthy clarity. “Wow, I don’t have to do this shit. I don’t have to take this shit.” Infinite wisdom told me that was a grave experience.