Help a teen in need

 Whatami? (@Whatami) 7 years, 9 months ago

Hi ! I’m a 17 years old boy with a thoughtful mind and lots of meditative problems to think. Even since my brother has arrived in this world ( he has 4 yrs now) i had been cought in an auto-distructive monotony. I didn’t learn in highschool as much as i learned in school, i wasn’t getting so much money as i used to and so on…Then puberty camed and i started to realize more subtancial problems about life and raised new questions without any answer… Now from only one year and a half from graduation i have problems with learning because my brain is numb and i still cought in the monotony. I am desperate. I became addicted to smoking ( this too is a big problem ), and my brother still pisses me off because we live in the same house. I’m not in a good relationship with my parents and i’m getting more and more alone, because my friends can’t help me. I am in a war between spiritual and physic…SO Please help me ! What can i do to end all of this? What can i do to learn more and understand more (because my NEED for kwoledge is big) ? What can i do first? I am helpless, i have no ambition. It pisses me of because i realize all of this and i can’t do anything about it ! Excuse my rude english and please help !

January 1, 2014 at 1:35 pm
Stephani (176) (@dancingscyphozoa) 7 years, 9 months ago ago

Love your brother. Fake it until you feel it. It sounds like you feel like he intruded on your family, took things from you (money, attention, etc) ? But he didn’t choose to come into this world, your parents brought him here. Talk to them, don’t put emotion into the conversation (its really hard to do but can be done with practice) but tell your parents how you feel and just keep trying to love your brother. Lastly, don’t listen to what I say if it doesn’t seem right. Breathe, smile, you know yourself better than anyone else does and only you can find an answer to your problems. You just have to breathe, eat right and listen to the universe. <3 May you find peace. <3

miqeel (17) (@miqeel) 7 years, 9 months ago ago

Hi Whatami? Thank you for your post. The fact that you wrote on this forum, proves to me that you have ambition and are on the right track to finding the answers you seek. I am guessing that even now, while I am writing these short words, you search for these answers.

Just have a little patience.

I can offer a few words of constructive advice – please note that you can decide if you want to follow with it.

1. Your relationship with your brother – did you ever find out why is that your brother annoys you? It could be a great experience for you to find the root of this problem. Once you find it, you can attempt to reframe your mind, and find a solution. Even now however, you can choose the reaction towards your brother. He is following the path of growth, similar to you and, maybe in the future will ask himself the same questions? Because he is not unlike you, you can help him grow, and through that grow yourself. As Stephani said above – love is the key!

2. The problems with learning – I doubt that your brain is numb, as you sound like a very inteligent human being. It may well be that the school environment is not suitable for your brain, and the process of learning imposed on you is not the best for your learning type. If you wish, read this book: google might help find you a free copy. Againg though, try to reframe your mind and be mindful of your inner talk, as it will have most influence on your wellbeing

3. The endless war between physical and spiritual – well, welcome to the club brother!! I am pretty sure that most of us here begun our journey with similar emotion. Youre on the right track. The key is to become aware of the fact that both of those ideas are exactly it – ideas. Spiritual, physical, these are just concepts people came up with to explain reality.

Reality, however is neither of those as reality IS. To help you with this problem, I highly reccomend to repeatedly listen this allan watts talk:

I hope I helped a little


lastunicorn (45) (@lastunicorn) 7 years, 9 months ago ago

dunno wat to say but stick it out man you can do it!

Anonymous (1) (@) 7 years, 9 months ago ago

On top of everything else said to you, I just feel like adding this: start running (or cycling). Run as long and as fast as you can, and try to see the beauty of it. Most frequent runners achieve a nirvana-like mindset while running to their fullest capacity. Just run like the wind. And when you got home (after bathing..) just go and see your parents and brother, and stay by their side a few minutes, chatting with them. It doesn’t matter what, even smaltalk it’s nice. They are your parents and they like to see you happy above of all. This will help you with the smoking problem – and by the way, if you want to quit, what’s keeping you, besides yourself?

You can also try and analyze every emotion YOU feel, to try to understand why you feel this way. Why are you pissed of? Why do you think you can’t do anything about it? It is you that are pissed of, so it’s you that can do anything about, and not anyone else. I mean, try to understand why you feel that way, and maybe you can begin to understand if there is any behavior you want to change on yourself. Don’t take my word, or anybody’s, for granted – try it for yourself and question everything, because the answers are different to each person.

Whatami? (0) (@Whatami) 7 years, 9 months ago ago

First, thanks to all of you ! I feel good that humans like me, strangers, help me in these situations. All that you said were just my conclusions of the problem and how i thought to solve it ! I already took all the posibilities that have been listed by you ! Yet, i feel that the solution of the entire problem, the entire feelings and relationships, the stress of home and school enviroment is FINDING ME ! I started about 2 months eariler to see what is it about “Finding yourself “. As strange as it looks, i started meditate one night a bit…and smt really strange happend…i heard a voice, a deep, low voice that said smt i could’t understand…than i freaked out because i knew it was all true….the thing with vibrations and astral projectig ( although i could’t manage to do it ), to self hypnotizyng….i know that they are true and i just want to be able to meditate more but the monotony allways wins. That is how desperate i am … i realize smt and i can’t change it…thx all of you…any thought of you will help and any help from you will be thoughtful .

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