I Am Dead on the Inside. Yes, I am Happy.

Jay (@StoneAngel) 7 years, 8 months ago

I am sick of everything I hear around me. People are very annoying. I have gone through this cycle so many times I get it. We all suffer. I suffer. I am depressed and miserable. And guess what, I am fucking happy that way. I find Joy in my misery. It’s mine, not someone else’s to define.

September 30, 2014 at 11:56 pm
josephm (772) (@josephm) 7 years, 8 months ago ago

suffering? you mean karma power-up’s?

[Hidden]
Anonymous (12) (@) 7 years, 8 months ago ago

well if you’re really looking for a sadgasm you should go for a lonesome walk and imagine telling people off

[Hidden]
Anonymous (17) (@) 7 years, 8 months ago ago

Passive aggressive people’s wet dreams, huh? I guess no one complains: “Hey, guys. I just got into a bar fight and won.”

[Hidden]
YHVH (462) (@spaceghost) 7 years, 8 months ago ago

And cursing at the cracks in the sidewalks.

[Hidden]
Manimal (2,998) (@manimal) 7 years, 8 months ago ago

Well I used to do that all the time, it was never a sad experience. More like a perfect fusion of anger and joy and relief.
Taking it further and actually telling them off…. yeah it was a high octane emotional climax, like a black hole turning super nova.
Damn I miss that feeling, I should develop a grudge or at least try to give a fuck.

[Hidden]
Blueflash (1) (@Blueflash) 7 years, 8 months ago ago

Dunno how to respond to this. Relishing your misery? Sounds awfully masochistic. Have you tried actively hating people? I find it helps.

[Hidden]
Anonymous (17) (@) 7 years, 8 months ago ago

I like you already.

[Hidden]
Manimal (2,998) (@manimal) 7 years, 8 months ago ago

It’s a dark world. Pitiful, corrupt, disgusting. And it’s supposed to be that way. One day you’ll understand why. Not believe, understand. Faith is for the feeble and the fallen, and so is hope.

People mistake ignorance and submission for innocence, they’re all playing active parts in the legion of shit, but they all think they’re innocent. For this, they will burn, burn far more than those who stand up for and admit their wickedness.

[Hidden]
Manimal (2,998) (@manimal) 7 years, 8 months ago ago

Sif: “You should admit, that of the children of the Asir, I alone am blameless.”

Loki: “That indeed would be so, if you were so. I alone know your lover beside Thor, and that was the wicked Loki.”

[Hidden]
Anonymous (12) (@) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

I think you need some flowers or something. In all seriousness though ( I hate that expression but really) if people knew love was waiting for them they would step right up to admit their wickedness. Compassion is key. You can’t cleanse someone with the hatred that made them dirty in the first place.

[Hidden]
Manimal (2,998) (@manimal) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

Haha don’t tell me what I can’t do, woman.
Flowers killed for my eyes would not please me at all, I am not morbid or sadistic like that. I would not appreciate a person who would bring such gifts, I would resent them.

A person who would only admit their shit if they knew love was waiting for them… is nothing but a manipulative coward, hiding her true self to avoid intimidating or angering others.
And by the way, the people who seem the most convinced that love is awaiting them, unconditional divine love at that, are the people who try the hardest to hide their wickedness. I’m talking about the religious folks, of course.

If I hated you, I would not question you. I would aid you in your strife to choke on “love and compassion”, help you build your castles in the sky, applaud your descent into ignorance and cowardice.
You see, true care for the living is usually of the tougher variety. Especially in times like these.

People want to stand tall, but rather than doing it truly and properly most would rather find an effortless way. Rather than doing it the way that is reliable and sustainable, they accept great risk just to get that instant gratification. And when they see people doing it right, they feel a need to ignore and deny their own shortcomings and the risks they bring.

You want to stand tall but you feel weak and low and bent, so you get on a chair. You want to keep your head high, so you tie a rope around your neck.
You call this chair compassion, you call this rope love. As long as you have them, you can stand tall without trying. But as long as you depend on them you are absolutely trapped, and even a small accident can make you fall. And if you do, you don’t just fall and hurt yourself, you’re left suspended until you choke.

So stop trying to get up on that chair. Stop encouraging others to get on their chairs.
Stand up straight with your feet on the ground, or go for a walk if you prefer, just stay away from that damn chair. You will see, that you’re actually able to tower above those poor bastards, or kick their chairs away under their feet, realize that you were in power the whole time.

You don’t need love, you don’t need approval, you are good enough as you are.
Acting like you’re not… well that is probably the most wicked and hateful thing you can do in life.

[Hidden]
Starry Eyed BLiND. (670) (@cristinelizabeth) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

This is some real ass shit. And can be applied in a variety of situations. Keeping it real, i’m glad you are, it’s hard as shit sticking to your instincts. But you just took all of my feelings on many levels and expressed them vividly.. You can’t hide from yourself, and there are definitely easy routes and hard routes in this life. But whatever route there is always tests of who you really are. Maybe this isn’t what you were trying to portray but this is what i got out of your real ass response and I respect that you can express it so great. You do need honor and respect in this world. Love romanticized or not, is a healing connection with someone but most people don’t love themselves first or respect themselves first to even get on a greater level with someone. There’s levels to that shit. I have been alone for a couple months .. like the whole summer, I haven’t hung out with anyone and I have faced all of my thoughts on a daily basis mostly alone and i’m just staring at my life in the face. Some people can’t do this, they are scared to face themselves essentially.Or maybe i’m just making this all up in my head idk Lol. just my thoughts…..

[Hidden]
Anonymous (12) (@) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

lol I didn’t really think he was saying any of those things but I do totally relate. I’ve sat with myself in my darkness for a few years now. it gets better and better, because it feels like that’s where the light comes from. it’s better to lie with your spirit bleeding and whimpering on the floor until you can realize it’s an illusion than to keep coasting through society like a robot

[Hidden]
Anonymous (12) (@) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

but imo its really important not to feel like you need to be so independent. that is a hatred and denial of the fact that you really aren’t separate than everything else, and you miss out on the relationship with the rest of the world that you need to have.

[Hidden]
Starry Eyed BLiND. (670) (@cristinelizabeth) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

Lol! Yeah i’m sure it wasn’t the main points but just reading that with my current feelings of my life made me apply them lol. Yeah I just don’t want to comply to social standards as far as idk just abiding without questioning or seeking myself further than who I thought I was, I mean I get that I shouldn’t be so independent. I have had a flourishing social life up until this year. But where I live, in such a small town it’s like I don’t even want to be social i’d rather learn things and listen to music. You know imo I think anyone can go get drunk and be that socialite but I believe (well i’m telling myself anyway) that i’m challenging myself and just cleansing myself to let go of my desires and wants. I don’t even feel a want t hang out with anyone. But I do get artificial social interaction through Facebook i’m not totally secluded from social recognition because that’s not really healthy.. But I don’t know, I have like social anxiety it has brewed up in me because of situations I’ve been in recently , like my mouth shakes sometimes when I get nervous. But that has nothing to do w this, just sharing my social setbacks recently.

[Hidden]
Anonymous (12) (@) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

For me it’s more about having good vibes towards fellow mankind without having to be that socialite. Just not thinking of myself as cut off even if few people can relate to me but I can make them feel related to .My friends are mostly people that are like sisters to me since I was very young and they are very integrated into society without questioning. But it’s like the love between us is so strong even though I feel like they can’t relate with a lot of my thoughts. Emotional support is all it is really, and appreciating beauty. But I find that going out and just pointing things out that seem absurd in a lighthearted way makes them laugh and they can accept my eccentricity. But I feel like if you look sexy you can do whatever you want which is its own joke. I only had social anxiety when I felt forced to be somewhere. If you go of you own accord it’s more freeing to realize most everyone else is there because they feel they have to be. It gives you extra style too. lol. I support your seclusion though because I think it’s been good for me in the long run. Sorry that was a tangent but I was following your lead hah.

[Hidden]
Anonymous (12) (@) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

At this point I feel peaceful socially, just not very creative. It’s bizarre to have awareness that you’re complying and abiding while you’re doing it.

[Hidden]
Starry Eyed BLiND. (670) (@cristinelizabeth) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

Exactly I just think too much into social interactions sometimes lol, but I can be very social if I want to be. I have a varied range of friends I could flourish with but I’ve just felt like .. I don’t know, I’d rather just hang out with myself. But I do have emotional support from my mom and some close friends i keep in contact with so I understand having friends like that, mine have moved away from me lol, and I don’t think I belong in environments I don’t feel comfortable. Like girls to me, I just feel like they just are in a contest with me sometimes like i’m competition so if I drink alcohol and girls are giving me bad vibes I don’t ignore it i call it out.. Just a lot of jealous people around my neck of the woods, and I learned you can’t fuck w everyone. But i get that freedo of choice thing lol, i’m waiting for the best opportunity to represent myself in a scial format but until then idk just low key ass bitch ha

[Hidden]
Anonymous (12) (@) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

Yea I feel you. I’ve always had a weird relationship with that. One of my best friends lives with me and I’m always waking up to meditate and stretch when she comes in at 4am. I understand the competition thing of course but I don’t have it with my friends. It happened once that same friend told me my aura preys out all the women… Who knows exactly what that means but then I sent her an internet pic that said something like “beautiful women don’t compete they are too wild and just dance together” and then we let it go. I think envy is what causes me to see the equal beauty in all women. Gotta transcend the hierarchy and be your own league. Lol. Taking a role in society is definitely my next step. Were always a part of humanity even if
detached from common values. I think everyone should do nothing until they want to do something.

[Hidden]
Anonymous (12) (@) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

I feel like most people see socializing as a game to collect friends but I was always attached to my idea of being unique which was bad in some ways but good because I only focused on genuine connections.

[Hidden]
skyward (1) (@skyward) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

“I think everyone should do nothing until they want to do something.”
True as it sounds, you summed up my present state of being.

[Hidden]
Manimal (2,998) (@manimal) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

Interesting read, as usual. It’s always nice when someone has reflections and interpretations, rather than just starting a hatefest or going “This is the truth bruh, write a book.”

I agree with your conclusion. People’s fear of themselves is the main cause of the big problems.
It is jealousy and worries, not hatred and pride, that brings more misery and condemnation than anything else.

The monsters inside are not a problem, that which condemns and stifles our monsters is the real culprit.

[Hidden]
Starry Eyed BLiND. (670) (@cristinelizabeth) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

As is yours, i’m so glad to see you still owning shit on here lol. You own your opinions and statements. I mean I remember you were saying you were writing a book, and your words definitely connected with me on some level maybe not on the intended.

Yes, they are comfortable with how they got to where they are and they don’t see that there is always room to grow and change. They fear their power , as do I sometimes it just sets me back but maybe that’s because I haven’t really been apart of society lately I have separated myself and I have this struggle in my head that oh I’m special and then it’s oh i’m pretty meaningless. I just face these feelings that I have because if I just brush them off I feel like I am dishonoring myself ignoring my pain. When I talk to people about me feeling like this people are like you shouldn’t doubt yourself you’re pretty. Just because i’m pretty doesn’t mean I’m happy necessarily. I’m tired of that assumption, attractive people can’t dodge life set backs. I mean it’s great to be attractive but i’m just stating that my physical appearance does not accommodate how I feel on the inside. So I just welcome any set backs because it’s just a situation that will pass.
This society loves to break you down and build you back up with “normal” standards. But I break my own self down and build myself up, Or maybe I’m just crazy these days not sure..

[Hidden]
Manimal (2,998) (@manimal) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

What if you’re both special and meaningless?
What if you’re both crazy and right?
What if your power deserves both fear and love?

I’m pretty certain that people are so comfortable with being broken simply because they haven’t really thought about it, haven’t thought about how things could be or used to be, haven’t taken a moment to just look at what they’re subjecting themselves to… and why.

People are stupid like that. That’s why they act like the things you have and do would somehow “fix” your deep thoughts, when there’s really no connection. No matter how perfect one’s life is, and no matter if the world is a good or a bad place, that won’t affect our inner quests.

[Hidden]
Anonymous (12) (@) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

Hmm.. I hear what you’re saying but I don’t think that is what I’m doing at all. I have my feet, my heart and my thoughts. No chair or rope. My insecurities make me laugh mostly now. There is a world where things are all math and selfishness and there is also one where it’s all faith and oneness.Love connects them. It isn’t a castle in the sky. Wickedness stems from inner hatred of self, I agree. But tough love is not the best way always, I really don’t think so. I’ve subscribed to all your words many times. It doesn’t work, at least not for me. And I’ve spent my entire life analyzing other’s selfishness and competition with each other. I feel the dishonesty and desperation in all people and still feel it mostly truthful to forgive always. The dishonesty is in not admitting love and compassion cures it all.

[Hidden]
Manimal (2,998) (@manimal) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

You say you’re over your insecurities, but everything seems to imply that you’re just using new crutches to get rid of the old ones.

Those worlds of which you speak do not exist. Not everything is math, sure you could probably find a way to translate even the undiscovered stuff to math, but that’s not certain.
Selfishness isn’t a real thing, because for it to be there would have to be a duality of selfish vs not selfish, which there is not. Everything is selfish, thus selfish is a redundant and useless concept.
Faith is plain bullshit. Oneness is a fallacious misunderstanding of farfetched theories, oneness is just a mirage.

I never told you to subscribe to my words, never asked you to believe me. On many occasions, I did the exact opposite. The fault is in your stars, not mine.

And what do you mean it doesn’t work? What the hell are you trying to accomplish? There is no goal, other than understanding. There is no “works” or “doesn’t work”, and there is no subjective quality to understanding.
If understanding is not your goal, you have nothing to fetch in philosophy and deep thoughts. Just wasting time, entertaining your sorry little ego.

“love and compassion cures it all” is just an unfounded little pie in the sky, unmotivated wishful thinking with no regard for reality. It doesn’t work like that, it doesn’t even take logic to understand that.
Tough love is never hostile, and it sure as hell does cure some things some times. Which is better than nothing, which is exactly what all this soft-ass bullshit can cure, absolutely NOTHING.
A band-aid was never a cure.

You would rather have faith than understanding, because you’re ignorant and overly attached to your fantasies. That’s why you suffer, because you refuse to see what is causing things and thereby you can never find a solution.
That’s why the likes of me get to live the things others merely dream of, because we make sure to learn things and apply things instead of just playing make-believe.
Your dreams could be your reality, if only you would get your head out of your dreamy, sentimental pussy for a moment every now and then.

[Hidden]
Anonymous (12) (@) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

I don’t see things that way. You can say it’s because of my pussy and ignorance if you want. There isn’t any point in continuing the conversation. The goal is peace and love.

[Hidden]
Manimal (2,998) (@manimal) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

This is not a matter of seeing it one way or another. It’s a matter of seeing or not seeing.

I didn’t say it was because of anything, and the “pussy” thing is just a figure of speech yknow.
As for peace and love… that may be your goal but that doesn’t mean it’s everyone’s goal. And how do you know if your ideas will get you closer to that goal?

[Hidden]
Anonymous (12) (@) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

It’s really a matter of everyone having one pair of eyes and being limited to that. Seeing something different than you is not cowardice or fluffy idealism. You can study how things happen, but not the ultimate why. Getting shit done requires a why. Getting real shit done requires a why that isn’t for your own survival and thriving, but the love of relationship with the world. I wouldn’t share things I didn’t experience to be helpful and true.

[Hidden]
Manimal (2,998) (@manimal) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

Most things aren’t subjective, this is no exception. I don’t care about being right or wrong, I enjoy being proven wrong because that means I’m learning. Claiming knowledge or superior opinion on subjective matters is faith, which I detest.
I don’t care about my way, or your way, or “god’s way,” or “the human way,” or any such crap. There is no such thing as right belief, only delusion vs clarity.

As for the ultimate why, well it’s reasonable to assume that with or without science it will one day be known. Not believed, known. Belief is just a lie that loops back into itself.

You don’t need a why to get something done. Most people never know a real why for anything they do, they just float along.

And what is this “real shit” anyway? And how exactly does love fit into that equation?
If you can’t figure out the “how” of something, don’t even bother trying for the “why”. And if you don’t see the “what” very clearly, you have a lot to figure out before you can grasp for a “how.”

All these people, talking about the “real shit”, which they can’t even define… yet somehow act like they have an idea about how and why and when it will work, or what it’s even about… it’s getting really fucking tiring.
Beliefs about beliefs about beliefs about beliefs.
And then you talk about “seeing” and “eyes”, where only imagination is active.

[Hidden]
Anonymous (12) (@) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

The only faith I believe in is in yourself to make your own judgement, even with the influence of imagination which we need to think at all. It is very tiring to speak of these things, and I don’t think it’s necessary either. I first commented on your negativity towards the topic in the OP… I don’t think it’s fact that the world is pitiful and corrupt. It depends how you look at and label neutral things. Most everything can be debated. But a lot of the time it’s a waste of time unless you really need to agree with someone.

You would need a why before you looked into how. When I say “real shit” I mean doing things for a different reason than acquiring power and flattering one’s ego. You share lots of knowledge but you mix the presentation with your beliefs just like anyone.

[Hidden]
Manimal (2,998) (@manimal) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

Actually, you don’t need imagination to think.
There was no negativity in my first post in this thread. If you have an issue with the darker themes of life, that’s on you.

Name any being or thing of this world and I’ll show you that it is in fact pitiful.
Where there is people, there’s always corruption, always.
Nobody needs to agree with anyone or anything, only fear could make it look that way.

So this “real shit” remains undefined then? Just as I thought.
Yknow, by that vague description, I’m doing lots of this “real shit” but you said I don’t, and I don’t have that “love and care” stuff you claim is necessary. How the hell do you explain that?

And the ego, it does not care for power, only feelings and beliefs.

That last part is not a belief, it’s a scenario where there is a way it is, and many ways it is not.
Differing beliefs is when you say something is bad and I say it’s good. But when we both look at a stone and you call it a turtle, that’s a matter of knowing vs imagining.

[Hidden]
Anonymous (12) (@) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

We have to use the imagination to visualize concepts and apply them. Pitiful and corrupt to one person might be noble to another. It’s not one way, it’s always a value judgment when words like pitiful are used. That isn’t concrete like a stone. You can look at a paralyzed person and admire their acceptance or pity their handicap.The object of your judgment doesn’t change, but the judgement can always vary. I didn’t define it but I did narrow it down, it’s not so inadequate as you say. And it’s not a concrete idea either, “real” will be different to everyone. “real” shit to me is when people do things very consciously and humbly. That is also a value judgement. No one has some infallible objectivity, no matter how much information they have.

[Hidden]
Manimal (2,998) (@manimal) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

But you’re assigning negativity to what I said, you even admitted that. In previous discussions, you have assigned other such values (bravado, macho, etc.) to what I said, which weren’t really there.
That’s the problem.
Just like how you’re acting like I said I have an objective outlook on things… I never said that.
Yeah we’ve all got our crayons out to try and colour in what people say, but you keep acting like the things you paint are what was said.
You’re replying not to what I actually said, but to what you turned it into.

Everything is pitiful. Honestly denying that means misunderstanding what the word “pitiful” refers to.
As for corruption, well corruption is a bona fide thing, whether a person sees it or not, and whether they like it or dislike or do not care, does not matter.

Acceptance… well, accepting one thing means rejecting other things which may be greater and more admirable.
People who are too quick to accept things do so purely out of fear and/or laziness.

[Hidden]
[Hidden]
Anonymous (12) (@) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

I think you know I’ve only pointed out why people interpret you with those values and never actually accused you of being those things. But I think you do often mean to speak with bravado. You can call me psycho for thinking I can know your intention, but I’m still going follow that hunch..And if you don’t, then it’s other people feeling threatened of their own accord, but I think you know all these subjects are very challenging to the ego and people will be extra sensitive to challenge.

Pitiful is very much an opinion and a lense. But you can paint it anyway as you said.

I seek the same one truth and way as you do. The pieces I find aren’t fantasy just because they can’t be confirmed with conventional scientific methods. If you want to write me off as a psycho because I choose to acknowledge otherworldly truth, I mean that’s cool…

Science came after the universe.

[Hidden]
Manimal (2,998) (@manimal) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

Well you don’t know my intentions or my characteristics. What’s the point of acting like you do know?
And why would I call you a psycho?

Everything is pitiful, but I’ve noticed Americans tend to not have much of a sense for pity. Other than self-pity, of course.

Fantasies may contain a grain of truth at times, but that doesn’t mean they aren’t fantasies.
I don’t think anyone has ever said that science came before the universe. That’s ridiculous. And you can’t even study something that doesn’t yet exist.

[Hidden]
Anonymous (12) (@) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

I think a real grasp of truth wouldn’t lead us to be analyzing paragraphs of information and converting people to our perspectives.

[Hidden]
Manimal (2,998) (@manimal) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

This is where it gets funny.
Because that is very much a perspective.

Scientists, cynics and skeptics are not trying to convert anyone to their perspectives. They are less attached to perspectives, that’s why they see better.

[Hidden]
Anonymous (12) (@) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

No one sees better. They can only trust their view. I see a huge safety net in cynics because there is an avoidance of trust. To be truly “faithless” one would also need to let go of the scientific method.

[Hidden]
Anonymous (12) (@) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

Knowledge is essential but it doesn’t solve the mystery of human will. Bullying oneself and others into accomplishing things doesn’t have any meaning in it for me, unless there is an even larger reason. We all have it, but it’s in the heart.

[Hidden]
Manimal (2,998) (@manimal) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

Knowledge is LITERALLY the ONLY thing that can solve ANY mystery AT ALL.
If it doesn’t solve the mystery it isn’t knowledge, and vice versa. It’s really that simple.

[Hidden]
Anonymous (12) (@) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

tough love creates a more hostile environment than there already is. if everyone else is all chill and accepting you realize you’ve still got things rotting inside and there is no one to blame.

[Hidden]
TheSeer (168)C (@drallarnnat) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

Agreed. Props to you for pointing that out; hostility gives someone an excuse to blame you for their own problems, whereas if you are compassionate, and their problems still exist, they have no choice but to take responsibility for their own state of being.

[Hidden]
Manimal (2,998) (@manimal) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

The hatred that made you dirty came from within. It can only be vanquished from within.

[Hidden]
The Fucking Police (0) (@thefuckingpolice) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

Shut up Bukowski.

[Hidden]
Anonymous (328) (@) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

Where is your incense?

[Hidden]
Jay (9) (@StoneAngel) 7 years, 8 months ago ago

To suffer means to push yourself to something higher. One’s fear, pain, and misery does not exist to be ignored, they exist to help you understand yourself. You define your suffering, not someone else.

Feeling unpleasant emotion fully is not negative. If your goal is to eliminate it with whatever therapy you feel suits you, be my guest. I understand the cycle of suffering in myself, and because of that, I can find true joy in my life.

If you thought this post was about a sexual thrill over pain, you missed the point.

[Hidden]
Anonymous (12) (@) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

why would anyone think that?

[Hidden]
Manimal (2,998) (@manimal) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

Pain is just an indicator of what you’re doing right and wrong, a warning sign to keep you from unnecessary harm. Put your hand in the fire, it hurts so you know you gotta keep your hand out of the damn fire. Same thing goes for mind/spirit/whatever you wanna call it, pain is just a wake up call.

Those who engage in pain for the thrill and arousal may stumble over something greater. Sex, usually of the more extreme variety, is often held as the highest of all spiritual practice.

[Hidden]
Tine (366) (@tine) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

“Those who engage in pain for the thrill and arousal may stumble over something greater”

you mention physical pain in the context of the fire, and then mind/spirit/whatever, the emotional metaphor,

if one were to hurt themselves over and over physically, would not a tolerance and resistance to physical pain, especially in the area inflicted, be the outcome? a numbing?

is not this the same then when it comes to using pain, something you defined as, “… a warning sign to keep you from unnecessary harm.”, the numbing effect that occurs with the physical, tolerance, is also the same with emotional numbness?

to clarify what i mean, when you use something that is a ‘warning sign’ as a way to arouse yourself, what becomes of the emotional numbing?

[Hidden]
TheSeer (168)C (@drallarnnat) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

@manimal ( as well) One observes both and so one is neither. Joy and pleasure can be utilized the same way pain can in order to understand oneself. One can find pain in illusion and one can find pleasure in illusion, too. Therefore, to say that “pain is a wake up call” for the spirit, as well, is simply to miss the point entirely; any sort of pleasure or pain is examined impartially, for to do so is to eventually reach a state that cannot be touched, and only then will lasting fulfillment come, even in the greatest bouts of pain… otherwise, your pleasure and your pain are both based upon temporary conditions.

[Hidden]
Milo (57) (@milo) 7 years, 8 months ago ago

Glad you got it all figured out

[Hidden]
Anonymous (0) (@) 7 years, 8 months ago ago

Your suffering is just struggle. We all struggle.
It comes and goes.

[Hidden]
Cpt (379) (@CptSleeze) 7 years, 8 months ago ago

People suck. I agree. Current affairs of the vast majority of the world do suck horribly. People are distracted by mindless things and its hard to find true value and meaning expressed in society. Occasionally it bothers me still; but I substituted negative thoughts, speech, and actions for positive ones while maintaining the same opinion. Its not even an opinion, there are better things for people to focus on. The better thing to do is to meditate, let go, or enjoy every little simple thing. Become more happy and content than the stressed ridden adrenaline junkies, not more depressed- that’ll show them.

Anytime you remember to, stare or zone out in some leaves, the wind, trees, or the sun. Surround yourself with nature. The more you are engulfed in nature with fresh air, sun, and just seeing and hearing nature, the happier you will be-research shows increased dopamine/serotonin increases when the eyes, ears, and lungs are exposed to nature. The easier it will be for you to laugh at the absurdity of the world, instead of hate it.

[Hidden]
[Hidden]
Ellie (1,363)M (@tangledupinplaid21) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

this comment makes the most sense to me out of anything in this thread.

[Hidden]
Anonymous (17) (@) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

Well, to me too. While some people keep saying their life or the people in their life suck some other people do something like this and it doesn’t suck. It doesn’t make any sense after some point to just do nothing, you go crazy. If I have to choose between doing nothing and going crazy, I’ll go crazy.

View post on imgur.com

[Hidden]
Mike Wuest (510) (@mikeyw829) 7 years, 8 months ago ago

Yeah I was thinking yesterday how I have zero ambition of building up my own little life anymore. Of making myself better. Of adding things to myself. Of obtaining a little short lived security and comfort in a world where everything goes away. Of making things better for me.

I ALMOST give no fucks at all anymore. It feels like I’ve died somewhat, like I’ve committed suicide without physical death. Although it’s a process and there’s more of me that’s dying all the time. It’s really a good place to be. It’s beyond the point of being sad and depressed.

I don’t really have a personal will anymore. I mean I do, but it’s not as overpowering as it used to be. It’s not pulling me in a thousand directions. But I feel something else moving me to act sometimes, like an impulse that is beyond me. I’m dying and something else is moving through me

[Hidden]
Anonymous (12) (@) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

right??? me too. split between personal will and divine will. But you have to know how to ignite your own fire which is what I think the period of extreme personal ambition is for. Sorry to sound crazy but it seems there is already a thread for each of us to follow.

[Hidden]
Anonymous (12) (@) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

not that i think they are two different wills. its just a bunch of things you thought you wanted

[Hidden]
Blueflash (1) (@Blueflash) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

Eh, happens. I barely had any motivation to do anything before. I definitely don’t now. In some halcyon days, I liked to think that I was at the top of Maslow’s hierarchy of needs and the only thing separating me from true bliss was discovery of my own potential and what I could achieve. Of course that was dented somewhat when I realised I have no discernible talents whatsoever and I’m an insignificant speck of dust in this vast universe. But we all carry on, have to carry on. To exist if not to live. I’m still hoping I’ll stumble across some grand purpose of life in my wanderings and find my raison d’être. Because that’s what I’m doing … wandering. Going where the wind takes me. Plans are for pansies.

[Hidden]
Lowry (114) (@lowryderkid) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

Read Siddharta by Herman Hesse

[Hidden]
Starry Eyed BLiND. (670) (@cristinelizabeth) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

I feel you on this. 100.

[Hidden]
jjj (32) (@crackedout6pack) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

this is really interesting. Let me know what it all boils down to.. If I don’t get there first!! Haha!!
Lol.

But seriously, I’ve experienced this kind of feeling too and it makes me wonder sometimes what the future is, because it’s like.. What;s the point. On the one hand, I resonate with all this stuff about having a purpose for my life, and then the next second, I’m super happy just basking in the bliss of doing nothing and just being lol..

Then guess what, after like a few days of ‘being’ and letting go of shit, my life situation suddenly improves.. Like the whole thing just wants to get me tangled up again, into desiring, wanting, striving and moving forward.

It’s crazy.

I’m just gonna have fun from now on.

[Hidden]
jjj (32) (@crackedout6pack) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

it fully used to be about money and success and achieving all my goals.. I wrote bucket lists, and I have goals that I write down every single day, push myself to achieve them….. Now it’s like.. Whaat.. What’s the point almost.
How futile of me to wanna do all this stuff.
Then I let go.. Then amazing shit happens and I’m like :O Goals GOALS GOALS!!!
Loool.

[Hidden]
OctobersFog (0) (@GalaxieSpawn) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

Wed get along great .

[Hidden]
Anonymous (17) (@) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

You know, there are actually works on modern psychoanalysis concerning exactly this problem with people. The book is on psychoanalysis itself, even if it is considered outdated by many self-righteous specialists and it’s called “The Hate That Cures: Psychological Reversibility of Schizophrenia”

It’s about expressing yourself and that that cures YOU.

Well good fucking morning, science.

[Hidden]
Manimal (2,998) (@manimal) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

Why is it that the posts that deserve readers and comments usually get the least?
I’ll definitely have a look at that book, thanks for sharing.

[Hidden]
Anonymous (17) (@) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

I think because I said “fucking”.

[Hidden]
Manimal (2,998) (@manimal) 7 years, 7 months ago ago

Perhaps.
Or maybe it’s just that people don’t want to “ruin the magic”

[Hidden]
Viewing 11 reply threads
load more