Okay, so i’m 14 years old and i should be outside and with my friends and all this kinda stuff but i’m not. Instead all i do every day is spend hours and hours on the internet. Not even doing anything, just scrolling through tumblr and sometimes streaming t.v shows. I do have friends but they all live in different towns so if i do wanna see them it’s a little harder than going, ‘hey let’s hang out in 20 minutes’. I’m not very happy with the way that I’m living, it makes just sad i guess. And the thing is i don’t even know what to do anymore if i’m not on the internet. i don’t really know how to live my life, i think its mainly apathy. My town doesn’t really have much to offer cause its kinda small. I’m just getting bored with my life i guess. So all I’m asking is like does anyone have any advice (???) Or something for me. I don’t even know what to do anymore.
I was in the same position at your age. Although I played a lot of xbox which filled the void. That’s also when I started getting into reading and writing so that filled the void even more. Do you have any hobbies besides T.V and internet? Things will pick up eventually, just be patient. You’ll get a job and then you’ll cherish being home on the computer. You’re at a perfect age. You can do anything you want to. Don’t be afraid to get out and try new things. This could be anything from volunteering to camping in the wilderness to reeking havoc. We all die, so treat this life as a game and the Earth your playground. Really, any activity outside of what you already do is great. Even if you go out and do something you don’t enjoy, you’ll appreciate being home on the computer that much more. And I’m assuming since you’re on this website you’re intelligent and have the capacity to learn and understand hard concepts. So fill up you’re time reading and discovering what life is really meant to be. Set some sort of goal in mind, no matter how small. Grab life by the balls before it’s too late. Depression is much more prevalent when you’re 18 with a ton of “responsibilities,” so try to have fun in any way that you can. But don’t think I don’t have the same problem. I am very apathetic, but I just accept it and hope that things will pick up again. they always do.
Do you have any hobbies? Any things that you really like to do? Some sports maybe? Try to find out if there is anything, besides internet, what you like to do. Play an instrument, choose a sport or any other activity that would make you feel better. Try to experiment with things if you are not sure what you like.
In the case of the internet, try to make it a habit to do something ‘useful’ on the internet. There are so many websites and the possibilities are limitless. You can learn anything by watching video tutorials on youtube for example.
Do you like to read? Try to find articles on the internet that you like to be better informed about.
Have you ever meditated? Maybe you could start meditating and see if it is something that would give you answers.
Good luck, you’re not the only one!
Go outside for walks, i recently stood in the house for weeks straight and began hallucinating and having scary thoughts and shit so, to keep from going insane, go outside and have contact with the sun, it has been scientifically proven that being in nature improves empathy, joy, and serotonin levels in the brain. With that being said, get up, and go outside.
Go outside, if you are by nature, GREAT. Get some sun. Meditate (deep breathing.. enhances awareness), run, something. Most people find much fulfillment through expressive/ creative outlets, like I do. If you enjoy painting/ drawing, go buy a blank paged sketch sheet and get to work. If you enjoy singing, go outside and walk/ sing if you’re to embarrassed to do so inside your home with family, like me. If you have an interest in music or writing, then start writing. Buy a guitar, saxophone, any instrument that catches your attention. Even if you suck at first and are extremely self conscious like I was, keep practicing until it becomes more natural and you get better, like a snowball effect. If you are in a position that doesn’t allow much socializing or partying then take advantage of that. Most of the time it can be a waste of time anyways that you could be spending to develop a skill/ experience in life. You know, the stuff that really matters when you become an adult. What ever your interest are, develop them and nurture them.. Or not, and continue scrolling through tumblr and watch other people make the most out of their lives.. Up to you..
The internet can be addicting and consume your free time. I suggest imposing a few computer free hours every day, and use that time to try out new activities. Also, don’t feel bad, most people felt similarly unhappy and perhaps searching or apathetic in their teens. It’s a good time to search for something you can really connect with, that doesn’t necessarily depend on your circumstances.
Here are some ideas for activities to try out:
Read. Find a subject, genre, or author that really pulls you in and dedicate some time to delving deep. I tend to find broad but shallow knowledge on the internet. Books help me focus and go deeper into one subject.
Athletics. Is there a sport you enjoy? It could be fun to try out new ones and find something that suits you. Just running and biking can really clear your head and are great life practices to develop.
Meditation/yoga. You can do both of these anywhere, and they’re great practices to help you deal with what life throws at you. There are also many approaches to both, so there is a lot to explore.
Art. Creative work tends to be a personal, independent activity anyway, so it can be a very constructive and liberating way to spend your time. Try out painting, collage, musical instruments, styles of dance, reciting lines, writing… etc. I personally love collage because the materials are cheap (any magazines, newspapers, or printed material. + paper + glue.) you don’t have to worry about drawing, and there are basically no rules. But the arts are broad and you can probably find a niche to try out. Don’t worry about being good, focus on finding an outlet that feels good.
Nature. Just getting out and exploring can be restorative when you’re feeling down. When I go for walks I like to take a camera. It’s kind of an excuse or justification, but gives me a purpose to capture what I find interesting, weird, or beautiful. You don’t have to share these photos, just mess around and see what you can find. Or just leave all that junk behind and really unplug.
Surrealist Games. We played some of these when I was in art school. Many don’t require more than one person, and they’re mostly just about opening up your mind and being expressive. There is a book of surrealist games by Alastair Brotchie, but you can also just google it. Here’s the wiki page http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Surrealist_techniques
It’s good that you’re realizing you want to do more with your time. Hope some of these ideas are helpful.
Its great to ask for help Smantha! I was too shy to ask and it got me into deep shit. I came to a point where there was no way out for me. And it all happened there, that I got very deep into myself by getting out of myself. Laying everything on the table and not keeping it inside. You see, we are all in a shitty situation, all humans suffer similar things and the moment you talk about them you will find understanding and acceptance, which makes suffering so much less – because it shared. Thats what life is after all – share your joys and share your worries. As long as you do that, there will be no problem that can become too big. Be open as much as possible about yourself so people can actually recognise who you are. Don the afraid to be yourself with all that you are. And you will progress quickly, and your life will flow like an adventure.
You are still young and full of potential. its awesome. Don’t worry if you feel directionless. It just shows me once again that our freedom does not want to be directed towards something, a goal or a situation. If you are on the internet fine. if you get bored, just sit there close your eyes every few moments and fell your body, breath. simple things in life are the real jewels in life. walk, breath, feel, smile, cry. don’t worry too much.
Ask questions… Good… Be honest… Check…. Feel a sense of detachment from your normal life…. Could get interesting…Ask total strangers for advice while informing them you are a 14 year old bored person…. WOO WEE! … You should be wary of taking advice from strangers… Well, then don’t listen to what I just you…
You are 14 years old… I’m kinda jealous, but I still feel a need to provide wisdom to an eager, young ” sponge”. Hmmm, you should….. No that got me in trouble at your age… How about…. Er…. Started a family with that wacky stunt…. Yeah, avoid making kids for a while. They are time consuming…REALLY time consuming.
Just think about what you like thinking about… What is that internal voice saying to you (besides what you are reading now).. Your life is stretched before you like the smells of a wonderful banquet yet to be served, and you are only on the appetizer.
As one ages, the past becomes a long list of spent choices and decisions that have lead you to here and now. Each day is adding to your lifes path. But at your age, although you may not feel it, your critical life choices have yet to happen. You can do ANYTHING. The fact you’ve chosen counsel here indicates a certain level of cognitive abilities.. I think..
Try to take mental snapshots of the special life moments. A “favorites” list, if you will. Eventually, you will stop seeking mental entertainment from outside stimulus and just begin enjoying your life. I cannot tell you how to live. But I can offer a different point of view.
Don’t forget to appreciate the scenery as lifes journey continues on. After all, we are all going to the same ending. JUST BE HAPPY. Age, but don’t get old. Have you ever been to a 3 ring circus? So many interesting things happening all at once and you can’t take it all in. Well life is a 50 ring circus, but most people tend to focus on their future selves and seldom notice or appreciate NOW. Right now is important. It’s all we really KNOW, we have.. The show is a marvelous circus of colors and sounds too many to take in at once.
NEVER let others think for you… Respect yourself and the good qualities of those around you. COMMUNICATE… Live in this world, but don’t get too upset if the world expects you to join in…CONFIDENCE is also a powerful tool if used with some basic intelligence. You are young and curious. Live, learn, and let life lead you without boredom.
Be yourself… Start smoking… No, wait… NEVER SMOKE….DRINK…but be careful, booze removes most logical thoughts after a while and your brain will insist the exact opposite.. Some of my worst decisions were after consuming alcohol..moderation is key… Spark a joint from time to time… If that’s your thing..
All this writing and I haven’t said much… Oh yeah, beware of long rambling writings that lack ample useful info. after reading on for a looong time.
Helping others and being honest bring happiness every time! Smile… It’s gonna be a trip!