Then I realized I don’t really know who I am. Always keeping myself occupied, doing something, distracting myself from my own thoughts, and when I wasn’t doing something, I was bored, and I searched for something to do. Television, a book, a game, eating, socializing. I was sick of always searching for satisfaction and happiness in the outside world. I didn’t want to live my whole life always looking and struggling to find myself and find pleasure and distraction. I wanted happiness with the way things are. Right now.
So I stopped, and I sat, and I did nothing. And that was the best decision I’ve ever made. I met myself for the first time, face to face. No more avoiding and running and looking for the answers in other places. I sat with my thoughts, I sat with my surroundings, I sat with my life as it was right then, and I found what I was looking for: Myself. Happiness. Contentment with right now. I didn’t have to search elsewhere, this was the true, natural me. I never had to create these or strive to develop these feelings and virtues. I simply had to notice them. By doing ‘nothing’, I achieved everything.
And what do you do now? How it changed your day to day things? Did you lost interest in other things and just sit around or domyou live an active life?
Being in an effortless state does not mean motivation to DO things. It makes action an expression of inner joy instead of an effort to change things in order to cease suffering.
I did lose interest in some things. I lost interest in the things that became meaningless and unproductive to me – Going out of my way to be accepted by certain people, even to the point of compromising my morals. Activities that were just used as fillers to fend off boredom such as boredom eating, watching television, etc.
I am an active person, but I am now more interested in health than performance or aesthetics. The time used towards weight lifting and other activities that I used to look good are now replaced with yoga, stretching, pranayama, and other such activities depending on what I feel like doing in the moment. However, I still am completely capable of activities such as hiking, running (which I do as well) and more intense activities like High Intensity Interval Training which is great sometimes.
It has changed my day to day life in that I am a calmer person. I am more effective in what I do. Most of my day to day routine has remained the same except for the differences mentioned above. What this has done more of is change the WAY in which I do the things that I do. It changes the way I react to situations and problem solve and changes my feelings about situations. Of course, I am not ALWAYS in this mindset. I am sometimes distracted and this has not yet become completely habitual. This is something that requires learning and re-learning and re-learning. Luckily, as I said in the original post, it’s one of the easiest things in the world, so learning and re-learning is not a problem!
Thx man, I was struggling with this, always in rush for some distraction, for something to do keep me occupied or a means to achieve something else. Always fighting. And somehow I could feel it and I knew it was wrong, something inside me is asking me to stop, just stop. I thought I had find myself sometime ago and maybe I kind of did, but I guess you can always lose as you said, and now I’m on this struggle again. I was afraid I would become a lazy, IDontWannaDoAnythingBecauseIDontNeedTo person, but I guess this was just an excuse, in many leves to many things.
Time to stop and go from scratch.
Precisely! Another analogy I believe explains this well is the dying of a white shirt. Each day, as you meditate and become this state, it is like dipping the shirt into the dye. During the day when you are not meditating, it is like the shirt is being left in the sun to dry. The shirt inevitably fades from the sun a little bit, but some color is still retained. And then, you go back into meditation, dip the shirt in the dye once more, and come out of meditation, leaving the shirt out in the sun to dry once again. After doing this enough times, the shirt will finally have the full color it is meant to have.
This is where life, every moment, becomes meditation. It is when this effortless presence has become the primary place that you operate from. I am excited to reach this state, but of course, I enjoy the journey just as much, because there’s no promise that I will ever reach my goal.
As Laozi said, ” A good traveler has no fixed plans and is not intent on arriving.” Life is a journey, a path. We travel upon this path every time we strive to reach a goal or work towards something, which is always. The happiest and most peaceful people are the ones that work towards the goal, for the sake of expression and action, but are happy just where they are, right in the middle of the path. The final destination becomes nice, but not necessary.
There is a huge problem yes, of looking back or forward to find something better or something lost… but everything is right here, every story that has ever been, every hero, every warrior, every victim, are all here now in different manifestations. And yes why can’t we be present? Why can’t we take care of ecah other? Of ourselves? I don’t know this. I feel that if we all do our best from the place we are right NOW, to be better people to those who are around us right NOW, then this is the plcae to start. Things will slowly slowly start to build and goodness will link up everywhere.
Whether you believe it or not.. thats the only guarantee you have. Everything WILL go as it should. The universe will never ever let something happen that isn’t supposed to. Therefore every single moment is perfect, regardless what you think or feel about it. The universe doesn’t care how you label or judge an event. It knows no ‘good’ or ‘bad’. It just is.. there’s something very calming in completely accepting all moments in life and realzing you never needed control.
peace stay with