Interracial Relationship

LeftyLefty (@leftylefty) 9 years, 7 months ago

many of us living in a big city are so used to working together, studying together, living together with people of different racial backgrounds and many of our friends are of different backgrounds.

and yet, when it comes to dating, are we not as liberal as we’d like to think we are? my guess is it’s just a personal preference. but perhaps deep down inside us, beyond the superficial political correctness, maybe we are a little bit racist?

if the superiority of racial mixing and the theory of survival of the fittest in the gene pool were to make sense, wouldn’t we be more attracted to people of other races in order to reproduce better and stronger offsprings?

or are we so influenced by the media that we find only certain groups of people attractive? are we looking for comfort in a group of people of the same backgrounds?

I am just looking to hear everyone’s opinion on this as I prefer girls of other backgrounds, but I don’t see mixed couples as often as I’d expect in a multicultural city.

June 4, 2012 at 8:43 pm
Anonymous (26) (@) 9 years, 7 months ago ago

It’s very interesting that you say this, because i myself have wondered the same thing. I have dated people of another race and I am just as physically attracted to other races as I am to my own. The thing is, the people I have dated of other races have tended to not work out. I keep asking myself why and questioning if I subconsciously am affected by social expectations. I really don’t believe that I am, but I do believe that how you were raised and your culture influences how compatible you will be with someone. I really do believe that the reason my interracial relationships didn’t work out because we came from different places and just had trouble being able to relate on a number of things. In no way at all am i saying one way of living is better than another, and I am very interested in learning about other people’s backgrounds.. but there comes a barrier and a lack of things to talk about at times. Obviously this is not all cases, but in my experience the difference of background has tended to be the downfall of the relationship.

Netto Germanicus (64) (@netto) 9 years, 7 months ago ago

Being myself a product of mixed race I actually tend to prefer a mate who is also of mixed race or culture. I just really feel like they can get me on many levels. I tend to not find attraction to someone who is not mixed racially or culturally which is odd in itself. It’s almost like a prejudice to be honest. Though I have dated out of my race many times, I feel like the persons culture is really what draws me the most. I want my children to have more then two languages and I want to adopt so I suppose for me genetics isn’t an Issue so much as the persons culture.

LeftyLefty (3) (@leftylefty) 9 years, 6 months ago ago

@hokelw, I can see a slight gap between different cultures, BUT if you are both from the same country and same city, you probably have a lot more in common than the differences, right?

I mean let’s take a Korean American guy with a Ukrainian American girl as an example. the guy probably doesn’t even speak Korean, doesn’t know the history of South Korea, maybe enjoys the food! and the girl would be totally immersed in the mainstream American culture. what makes them different is mainly the gender and the appearance.

but yet the guy would probably end up dating an Asian girl, and the girl would end up dating a white dude. there’s nothing wrong with that. but I don’t think the Korean American guy would be that much different from any other Caucasian American guy except for the appearance, and vice versa with the girl.

it’s just so hard to see that the cultural differences would be soooooo big!

@netto, it’s interesting that you are more attracted to people of mixed race just like yourself. maybe it kind of mirrors what Lizzie said. I don’t know for sure though. but it is interesting nonetheless.

I don’t think multiculturalism goes beyond ethnic food, sadly.

Jake (198) (@jesus) 9 years, 6 months ago ago

It’s all psychological, we are generally inclined to be attracted to people who look like ourselves in some major way (the most common being skin color).

You can still be attracted to or in love with people of other races/cultures of course, but it is simply less likely.

LeftyLefty (3) (@leftylefty) 9 years, 6 months ago ago

@jesus, as a person of colour, I can attest that the less multicultural a city / a country is, the more people there are who are attracted to people of other races. there’s a huge difference in Europe and North America for example. and have you heard of Japanese girls wanting to date foreigners living in Japan?

of course the attraction to exotic looking people is psychological as well.

sp00n (5) (@sp00n) 9 years, 6 months ago ago

I used to think it was based on skin color that i didnt want to date someone, but then i dated a puerto rican and a peruvian, and I realized that its the culture/class.

Every single girl i have dated or even been interested in has been from upper middle class or higher.

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