I don’t know if I’m waking up, the only thing I know is that I feel different. I’ve felt alone all my life and for the first time I don’t, I feel like I’m connected to every living thing but at the same time feel different to all of them.
Since I was a kid I used to wonder about life and no one seemed to have a convincing answer. I repeatedly used to ask the same question.. what would’ve happened if the physical universe didn’t exist? everyone around me said “well there would be nothing” I didn’t know what scared me the most, the fact that all of our awareness and thoughts could be reduced to pure coincidence of events that lead to life as we know it, or the fact that everyone seem to be careless and could say those words without feeling as lost as I was feeling.
Now I’m 20 years old and I’m glad to say that I know that that’s not true, and how can I know? I feel like I’ve always knew it, that answer came from inside me and I’m sure about it, I feel that physical life is not everything there is, is not the end nor the limit of what we really are (it is really hard for me to explain how I feel so I really hope you get it) and I don’t know what is that we really are but I know that it is all of us who make it otherwise I never would’ve felt that connection. I’ve always felt that I had no purpose on life and that my happiness came from others, now for the first time I feel that I need to find happiness in myself and one way of doing that is by giving love to other people, specially those who are victims of the evil minds. A part of me tells me that the best idea is dropping out of college, I feel that every piece of information that is given to me is just false and part of a system I don’t want to be part of, but on the other hand I feel that I could stay in college and try to use the information I’m given to try to help in some way but I don’t know. Probably it doesn’t matter what you study or if you study, what matters is to do something that helps make this world a better place using as a tool spiritual knowledge and always with your heart.
This is how I feel right now, I would really like to know from people that have had spiritual awakening if I’m starting to have it and if I am I would really want to know ways to keep on having this change.
Thank you! And sorry if I have grammatical errors, I’m not a native english speaker.
Finish your schooling so you can get a moderately good job and not have to worry about money. I dropped out of college twice and now work for $12/hr and have no fucking idea what I’m doing. I live paycheck to paycheck and am an alcoholic.
Ya don’t even have to do school for 4 years. Plenty of 2 year degrees are more hire-able and make more money than many 4 year degrees.
Ya want a good job.