it is about you………………(fuck d grammar)

jain the rahul (@jainrahul1992) 8 years, 10 months ago

the best and the shortest way of doing it is start questioning everything………..and u;ll be right there…………..for me it happened under similar circumstances not wanting anything not feeling anything…….but on THE DAY i felt very uneasy……i mindlessly watched tv..trying to shut my mind of all d fucking questions………it happened while watching a movie……..and in one of the songs the lyrics are “free myself form me”………and it acted like a last piece of puzzle………and everything fell in its place…………the feeling was exuberant(fancy word!!… hell l i know wat it means)……but the thing is it can’t be explained…………i really started feeling things………….i think its like a chaos in ur o so beautiful little world…………..and it makes u alive(the word has a real meaning)………and u just don’t do things u feel them………….i took out my car…………..bought a cigarette…………..and felt like laughing and crying at the same time………………o it was beautiful……………..i understand everything………..i am me…………..and u know the thing i noticed is you are preparing yourself for it………..everything i did before made sense………i think its in balance…………balance of everything ………..anf for it you need to experience everything………..i think i made the right mixture…………..the reason of my existence was a frequent question………….but i never got the answer………it doesn’t mean i have it now…………but i think i am getting close………….the thing u’ll foremost experience is freedom………….in ur everyday things…………u can do whatever you can……….whenever you can…………….and everything looks so different now…………..i feel like i am at all times……………….and i think it is always in you…………..somewhere in ur subconscious mind…………….just sometime someday in ur life …………stop and think of what u r thinking……………and damn u are thinking something at every moment…………without even knowing it………….and i think dats what makes this life so meaningless……….if u don’t even know ur existence,then world is a huge place my friend!!……………u feel changed………….and ur 20 year old mind feels the change………..and it wants you to act normally(i never knew wat that means)………..cause it has been acting the same way for 20 years…………….and we r a lazy ass breed………..change bring chaos in our life…………let everything go as it is planned…………..once just have a real conversation with ur friend…………..ask him his thoughts…………..and you know he would never have himself thought about it but o with so ease he’ll tell u everything………………just for once forget aboout ur survival……….for once forget about the future,…………for once forget the joys and sorrow of the past……………..do things that really matters to u!!!!!…………….yes u r selfish just like everyone else………………we r born to be selfish….(and selfish is a misused word)………..selfish doesn’t mean u r hurting someone or hurting their feelings……….it means you r living for ur own self………..just forget about ur friends for once…………forget ur social living…………..ask urself about “u”………………and this world will try to bring you down bring you back…………..there are devils lurking around every corner ……….face them……………..live like a lion…………….feel the universe……….stop hearing things ……..listen to them…………..o and the music will have a more beautiful meaning………..and for once don’t be inspired to write a book,paint a painting or design a building…………..feel inspired for living……………and this life is so beautiful……………..and every feeling of u will be so inspiring………….the hate will be immense………….the love will be immense……..balance bitches balance…………….!!!!!!!

February 4, 2013 at 6:22 am
Dan (890) (@danfontaine) 8 years, 10 months ago ago

@jainrahul1992, Heh good read. I like you.

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treeleaves (22) (@maddykane) 8 years, 10 months ago ago

i am a small person…
with BIG thoughts, and ideas and dreams & everything is so overwhleming, i could cry and throw up at the thought of the world and at the same time smile and laugh, and i just dont know what to do with all the knowledge i obtain i just want to stay ignorant and stop feeling and start feeling right , but am i feeling wrong? no yes, god i dont know.

i want to change the whole god damn world and i want there to be no suffering but at the same time i think that there needs to be the suffering as well as all the happy things… because balance…

i have had a really long life for an 18 year old and dont know if everything ive done or if everything ive been through is made me who i am or if some time i repell and ignore everything because i want to be something different
i am worried all the time, and dragged down by the past and just want to live for now this moment because its all we certainly have but at the same time, i cant stop having this feeling that i am trying to get some where

i have a cat who is my baby and i love him, i had to leave him to go to college and that makes me sad because i feel like he isnt getting the love he derserves… hahah god what is wrong with me

i am afraid of growing up because god damn it, i dont know im just afraid

IIM EXCITED TO BE ALIVE , i find this bullshit of the world tedious and useless but is it bullshit idk i have to go through it, so maybe its not

why is everybody so concerned

i have brown hair and my eyes change colors
and i want to live in a house surrounded by flowers when im older.

happy monday –

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Gare (9) (@fossilfuelsrule) 8 years, 10 months ago ago

I feel you chromie :j After so much clatter and clutter and ridiculous rituals repeated over and over again, you get to wondering why life is so monotonous at times, that is only because that was how i was living my life. So numb to feeling & emotion, succumbing frivolous antics like “that’s going to make me who i am and what i want to be.” And putting energy into everything but what i really want, not doing anything and only wanting to continue doing nothing. Repeating them as if i was waiting for something remarkable to happen for everything to change perfectly. So @jainrahul1992, since then I’ve been living like a lion and haven’t had time to care look back.

“I have brown hair and my eyes change color.” That’s what i reply with when people ask me who i am and what i do with my free time. @Madelyn Kane, that made my monday

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Anonymous (177) (@) 8 years, 10 months ago ago

@maddykane, “but am i feeling wrong? no yes, god i dont know.” A Korean Zen Master, Seung Sahn, said for us all to have a “don’t know mind”. So, good point there. “i have had a really long life for an 18 year old” – perhaps you have, especially if you add previous lifetimes to it. “i am worried all the time, and dragged down by the past and just want to live for now this moment because its all we certainly have but at the same time, i cant stop having this feeling that i am trying to get some where” Worry is like sitting in a rocking chair: you’re doing something but not going anywhere. And it is a habit. I had it once, but no more, so you can drop it too. The past is gone, gone, gone. It has absolutely and completely no power in your life whatsoever, except for power that you grant it. Yep, it is a choice. Don’t make it anymore. Forget ALL of it. Of course, you are correct, “now” is all that there is. Cannot be argued otherwise. Trying to get somewhere? Yes, in a way you are. However, there is actually nowhere to go. Nothing to do. The only Zen one will find on a mountain top is the Zen one takes with them. Here is a secret: you CAN drop all of these problems in your thought and life. You really can. Just a matter of accepting that fact/truth and acting upon it. Good luck! @jainrahul1992, Sounds right on!

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