stayed up until 1am last night studying for a test in sociology today. Half way thru my first class i had an epiphany and as i was looking around my classroom i felt a strong energy telling me school isn’t for me. Packed up my stuff, walked out before i even took the test and now my parents are kicking me out in May but i feel great and can really careless. now its time to travel:)
HERES TO LIFE!!
@kosta33, Congrats! here’s the thing: your true “self”, your primordial nature made that decision. don’t doubt. sure, there may be some uncertainty and even an element of fear may kick in from time-to-time. seems that would be normal due to the conditioning we often receive from every influence in our existence. go forward, Marco Polo!
I suggest you look into reiki. I was recently attuned at the reiki 1 level. It opens your mind and heart and for me personally, I realized what I wanted to do with my life and everything fell into place. Before i was attuned I had a goal to be successful but had really no idea how i would do so. After the attunement all my passions sort of fit together in my mind and an entire life plan came together for me. I realized what I wanted to do but better yet how I would go about doing it. Either way, good luck with whatever you do!
@kosta33 College is not the end all be all. A college degree does not always mean intelligent or knowledgeable. No matter which path you choose, it’s important to make sure the end result is happiness. But whether you choose to return to college or not, don’t stop learning. With internet access, you can self-teach yourself to do anything. It’s good to learn early in the process though that college is not for you (or at least not right now), finding out three or four years in when you have student loans is definitely not a good thing
Dropping out at the end of the semester. You are right in following your instincts. People have to realize that if you have interests outside of school, that are any bit distracting, then school becomes defeating. If you can’t keep up then you are going to be put into a state of panic. Thats what school is, a giant compliance latter. School is a business and it should be treated just like that. I’ve been reading about pharmacology, physics and calculus since I was 14. I thought College was going to be this great place of learning. NOPE, It’s a place were you pay money follow the class tempo, which is often dumbed down to the average students level(unless of course your at an ivy league school, which is ironic that I would have to pay more to learn at my natural pace). If your like me, and have been exposed to a large quantity of stimulation from a young age, then you will agree that it’s difficult for school to hold your attention. When that happens your grades slip and it’s easy to be tricked into thinking your not intelligent, when in reality it’s the opposite. Point is, if your going to pay for education it should be tailored to YOUR NEEDS and it shouldn’t perpetuate a rate race or perpetuate states of fear and panic.
Anyway, congrats a MAKING A DECISION. I think thats the biggest thing, just make a decision and stick with it, the longer you delay the decision the longer your delaying your journey. I’d recommend looking into spead reading, memory training, polyphasic sleep cycles and making sure you have a balanced diet. I believe that when everyone is balanced, has consistent energy and is consuming/retaining information at efficient rates there is literally nothing that can stop us.
@danz, “Point is, if your going to pay for education it should be tailored to YOUR NEEDS and it shouldn’t perpetuate a rate race or perpetuate states of fear and panic.”
That’s exactly how I feel. I like learning, but the way school is, it’s exactly like you said: a perpetual state of fear and panic. It doesn’t truly motivate me at all, it just stresses me out. It just makes me tired of it all. I’d love to just quit school, but the degree I already have isn’t worth the paper it’s printed on, and me being in school is the only thing saving me from having to go look for some shitty job. I guess school is better than that, but it gets so fucking overwhelming at times.
Luckily you’re not in debt, otherwise I would say that was a bad move. You were 3 years in. I would have said just pull through the last year and THEN begin your soul-searching/travels. You would at least have a degree under your belt and those three years of time, money, and effort could have been worth more than just experience- not that there isn’t any value in “just experience”. But this advise is mainly for those who would be in massive debt after dropping out. Unfortunately that’s my situation. But best of luck man, safe travels :D
What gives you confidence? I struggle with anxiety and depression on a daily basis. I always think people are looking at me or judging me. A lot of the time I worry more about what others think of me than what I think of myself. Any tips on how to build some confidence? I feel as though my anxiety is the only thing holding me back in life.
@openedmind Hey Nick! Sorry to read your post, man – not an easy road for sure. It’s gonna be real easy for myself and others to offer you advice regarding your condition, because all we have to do is sit back and type, while You are the one living your life. But, perhaps years of life experience and knowledge might lend something of help to you. The thing is that your thoughts and ideas have no more relevancy nor power than that which you grant them. YOU are in control! Perhaps you accept the ideas that you have about yourself and see them as coming from others onto you as well. So, that would be a mental effort, so to speak, or one might call it a “practice”. That is, to accept who and what you were when you were born. Were you like this then? No. You were born perfect. Absolutely perfect and self-contained. You had no ideas of inadequacy or such. Guess what? You are STILL that! These ideas and concepts have been picked-up along the way as you’ve grown-up, so to speak. I say, “if you’re not born with it, it’s not yours.” So drop this stuff: these ideas. Think about this: you CAN just as easily think of yourself as an okay being and fully confident JUST as easy as not! It’s the same mental process. Reverse your thinking. Again, yes, I realize that it’s so very easy for me to say. But, at 58 years along on this current journey, I’ve faced and dealt with similar. Perspective and attitude really DO effect our total outlook on everything. Each morning, look in the mirror, smile, point at your reflection and just say to it, “YOU ARE OKAY!” and give it a thumbs up. Peace, Love & Light to you, Nick :0)
@openedmind, man the only thing i can tell you from experience is to face your anxiety directly. Meaning when you feel anxious about certain circumstances or situations that you’re in don’t run but use them as a learning experience. you need to learn how to handle yourself and understand why or what is triggering your self doubt. i suffer from anxiety as well and used to always be self conscious about what other people think up until about a year or 2 ago. The more you experience, the more you learn about yourself. I like to think of myself in 3rd person and my goal in life right now is to figure myself out because just like you and every other human being we are a very very verrryyy complex organism/spiritual being. Master thyself before you try and master anything else (career, school, relationships etc.)
@stealf, parents only play a temporary influence in our lives, once you come to understanding with your being and needs of evolution you will venture away with your head up high and heart leading the way. Key with parents is communication, you need to let them know how you feel in the most sincere and positive way possible even if they don’t understand parents should support their kids regardless of the path they choose to take.
@winslow, no, it’s like if it’s not personally my most effective and beneficial way of for-filling my lifes purpose than theres no need to pretend to fall under the security and norms of institutional education lol but i can see why you think that.
@kosta33, Thats not necessarily my only concern about leaving. I’m mostly just worried about leaving alone without a friend or someone to talk to and help along the journey. I wouldn’t have a problem dropping out and doing what I want as long as I have someone with the same views and ideas as me.
@kosta33, No, you cant see anything about me. I told you the first time that I didnt have anything against it but im a little bit disappointed that evvvverybody was like hell yeah! Forget that goal you had when you started. If personally fulfilling yourself is blowing the money your brother got for being attacked by a dog then go ahead. I plan to make my own. Things mean more when you earn them. Lawsuits like that are bad karma anyways..
Literally just did this. Glad to read I’m not alone in my desire to explore more than just a textbook, and the inside of a classroom. I’m totally happy with my decision thus far and though I do have debt, I would rather pay my loans and bills right now, barely making it in a job I fucking LOVE than being stuck somewhere where I was absolutely miserable. I know I’m smart enough for a bachelors and I was kind of close to having mine but I was going to explode and crash and burn. Sometimes the best decisions are made against everything everyone is telling you, and right now I’m experiencing a sort of bliss and am comfortable knowing I can always go back and finish up, and hopefully will when I’m ready. Thank you sir, for you and I are not alone!