So many things to do. So many talents you own to explore and so many others to discover. Now, is the time. Your 20s are supposed the be the learning and error period of you life. I need to see what makes me tick and what doesn’t. I need to know what works and what doesn’t. But writing alone won’t accomplish that, I need experience to organize, analyze and interpret all that I yearn to know.
I am not alone, I am amongst a million others who are feeling the same way as I am inside, yet they do not know how to handle these feelings. Most are distraught by the confusion within them, and try to forcefully hush the raging waters that collide against the walls they built to protect themselves. Suddenly those walls seem not as strong. Progressively, they erode and soon, they fall.
I am aware of these feelings, I have in one way or another experienced many falls like that. But I get back up with a curious mind and a determined soul. I am motivated by others unwanted suffering and I am lifted by the power of love. Not any specific kind of love, for labels have corrupted the true meaning of the word. One of the truest, purest forms of healing has been tainted with sin and belief. Impaled by judgment and expectations. Shattered by unmoderated hope and loss of faith.
It’s hard to stand by and want to be a part of it all. I have had a taste of this sanctified emotion, and have abused it more than I want to admit. I have met and heard the stories of others who have and have lost this emotion all thanks to the infectious influences that disease the word.
This corrupted definition of emotion has damaged more souls than war or poverty. Love for not only the people, but everything that can take up mass and everything that is transparent, far beyond our physical touch. The balance of that emotion for the infinite results in the infinite. All that is and can be. All that was and would have been.
Everything is connected, but it is possible to not participate in it. The greedy hunger for such power. The selfish keep it to themselves.
Listening to others is something I do best. I like to listen to their stories and chronologically place each event they reveal to me in it’s place. Using my intuition I seek out their deeper meaning. I’m not always right. Life is too eventful and far too unpredictable for me to always be right. I am proved wrong by life when my emotions start to take over my mind. I fuck up, and I learn.
We all play a role in the lessons we learn from one another. Some way, somehow, the example we set for ourselves contributes to our species’ evolution. By now belief, judgment, and the ego has structured our evolution to develop in the wrong direction. We can feel it. The earth feels it. Amongst our own personal, fucked up shit we also have to deal with this unidentified sorrow and pain that radiates from the planet which has always provided us with air, food, shelter, and water.
We must let go of all that separates us, and realize we are one. We must first save ourselves before saving anyone or anything else. We must first come to terms with our own demons, so that we know every area where we must let light in. Then by trial and error, we learn our own ways to let the light shine onto all the dark, dusty, unexplored corners of our minds. That’s where each individual differs. The way we deal with problems. The things we create in life. The acceptance of ourselves as well as others, and what we do to make what we can right. The love we give, and how much we tend to take is what gives us an entirely different slate.
I am human. As is the next. Society influences our judgment of what is right and what is wrong. Unfortunately life is too complex for such broad labels. Too many aspects influence such a “set in stone” conclusion. As long as there is a balance between right and wrong, I believe what we do that is labeled a “sin” is not entirely sinful as long as their is moderation and a counterweight to even the stakes.
Each person is composed of infinite possibilities. How the fuck can we standardize everything and ritually use labels anymore? Is there a way to identify the infinite? As we seep further into the infinite, I fear we will be more lost than ever.
Fear. Fear of being lost and of the infinite. Fear of the unknown and unfamiliar. Where we are not comfortable. This is where the beauty lies within balance and moderation. When you are at peace with all that was and is, you can comfortably add more onto your plate without any fear to prevent you from doing so. Life involves a lot of risks we have to take, and these risks give us the experiences we need to define who we are.
I don’t want my ego to override the intent I have behind writing this. I am not looking for fame or attention with these thoughts and ideas that smother, seduce, and plague my mind. I am seeking for the rise of the open mind. I am sharing my story to connect the key components that intertwine and create the great mystery that is life. I will show you through a set of eyes that has come to realize we are all fighting the same fight. Struggling to endure and reap the fruits from the gift life presents to us. Out of all of this I pray that I can hopefully guide you through your own unique, inevitable, universal, inexplicable joinery that we all endure that is life.
Can we not empathize with our own feelings and feel the pain of others’ internal struggle? So many are blinded, yet we were once too. We struggle to simply be. Why must there still be so much greed after all our world has seen? With all that we know and all that we will come to know, there is no point nor reason for hate or filth or greed. One day our race will be in dire need of one another. One day we are going to be given a universal ultimatum to either kill one another in order to survive or assist one another in order to ensure our inevitable survival. Yeah, I’d rather go with the option that has a definite and positive outcome. And I assume so would you.
In order to portray what I intend to, there needs to be an understood acceptance of the ones we label, “sheep”. We, too, were sheep. We were born as “sheep” and raised in a country that encouraged such attitudes, behaviors and tendencies of the ones we now define as “sheep”. Take kind of the ones who are blind and those who do not wish to see. Life will send them on their unique, inevitable, universal, inexplicable journey that eventually brings each one of us to our knees. Then, and only then, will they ever begin to see.
The first step of many.
We were once there too. As a matter of fact, we relapse back into that mindset once we start to become weak. Getting back up again is what makes us strong. Persistence is key. We cannot judge those who do not see life in all it’s raw wonders, we too were once lost in it’s many complexities.
Set the example for the world you wish to see, but first come to terms with who you are and who you want to be. Realistically. Without labels, with out any standardized definitions to influence your personal, internal creation. Let your search for balance allow you to accept the good and the bad that lie within you. Accept what is and change what you cannot accept. Breathe comfortably. Become a master in the art of your own technique in dealing with change.
I only hope the interpretation of my own life will assist you in finding the light that will lead you towards your own internal peace. With all of that, and the much more that will be written I have faith that we can make the right decision when we are given our universal ultimatum, to either slaughter and peril or to love and reap what we know from one another to ensure our inevitable survival.
I like your ideas, but some of it, like the “universal ultimatum” sounds pretty new-agey to me. As if there is going to be a date in the future when we are given a message from the universe on some specific day and in clear terms. Sounds like the 2012 prophecy. Unless I am interpreting you wrong.
We already have our “universal ultimatum” right now. And we had our universal ultimatum in the past, too. Evolve or die. Continue on the same path and face certain destruction, or change paths. This isn’t going to happen in the future, and nothing outside ourselves is going to make us decide to change, or tell us to change. We decide to change, because if we don’t we will destroy ourselves.
Maybe you mean that as a collective, we won’t realize this ultimatum until things get really, really bad? And at that point, we can agree as a collective that there is an ultimatum?
But you seem to be implying that there is some intelligence, like an alien or something, that will send us a message somehow. We create our own messages through the destruction we sow. The state of the planet is the message.
Also, it is not necessary to be completely brought to your knees in order to wake up. If you are perceptive and pay attention, that isn’t necessary. If you distract yourself and do not pay attention to the consequences of your actions, you will only wake up when the consequences get so bad that you can no longer ignore them. But it isn’t a necessary path.
For the collective, you are probably right. It will only be when the suffering gets so intense that we can no longer ignore it that people will start to wake up. But for the individual, it’s not necessary to get blind-sided if you can see the storms coming and take appropriate action to change your life, and change course before things get too out of hand.