New Friends?

 Beverly Johnson (@lovydovybevy)4 years, 8 months ago

Hey, awkward and maybe weird question…

Where can you make new friends?

I’m not trying to replace the friends I do have. I would like to shake things up a bit, though. I’m currently feeling unispired friendship-wise. 

I realize that a big part of this is going to be me making the effort to talk with people which is always a tad harder for me as I’m the introverted type. But I find a lot of value in having a companion to experience life and discuss my musings with. 

Where do you find people with similar interests, tastes, and overall just people you can vibe with? 

It may be important to note that I am 23 years old, living in San Diego. I think I could really benefit from some friends who are a bit older. 

Bev

September 4, 2016 at 11:59 pm
JuicyClaws (6) (@JuicyClaws) 4 years, 8 months ago ago

Crazy you say that, I’m hurting so bad emotionally right now that none of my friends are available for me right now. 

I’m 23 living in New Mexico. 

-Netta

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Abby (1) (@Abby-Mckay) 4 years, 8 months ago ago

Wow so weird I have been feeling exactly the same recently! It’s just so hard to meet people when you are a bit older and not at school or college/university don’t you think? I am only 23 as well and I live in the UK.

I just want to meet like-minded people but I don’t really know how to, I am quite self-conscious but trying to work on that and be more confident. 

Abby

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Beverly Johnson (48) (@lovydovybevy) 4 years, 8 months ago ago

Yes I agree with you Abby. I’m more of an introverted type as well which can sometimes hinder my ability to approach people. I think the key might be to be genuinely interested in other people and their stories, and not think so much about how we are perceived. Of course, that’s easier said than done haha.

Good luck to us on your friend-finding ventures!

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Rémi Marenco (1) (@Remi-Marenco) 4 years, 8 months ago ago

Hey Beverly!

Have your tried meetup.com? Find the things you really like, and go to these events (even outside out meetup.com). You have more chances to find friends this way than following the “crowd”

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Beverly Johnson (48) (@lovydovybevy) 4 years, 8 months ago ago

Hi Remi, 

You know what, I actually have an account on meetup.com but I haven’t actually gone to any of the meetups. I guess I’m just scared of my potential awkwardness in these situations, but I’m going to really consider it now. I just gotta get over that fear and just do it. (Easier said than done.)

Thanks!

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Rémi Marenco (1) (@Remi-Marenco) 4 years, 8 months ago ago

Awesome to read Beverly!

Try to pick something that is your passion, or a huge interest (and plan C something that you are curious about) and you will see people are as arkward as you heh :D. Just find the right place where your akwardness is accepted or even better: Welcome! And that will happen there ;)

Have fun, and let us know ;)

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Rising (3) (@Rising) 4 years, 8 months ago ago

This is actually a great question, don’t feel like you are on your own in this. Their are many circumstances today that make us want to meet new people. From moving to a new neighberhood or a new city to looking to expand our horizons or perhaps changing our toxic environment; there are plenty of good reasons to seek new friendships.

From experience, there are a few ways to meet new people. Ideally we may want to simply meet new faces and let friendships grow on their own. It’s a natural process, so forcing it makes no sense. A few good places to start :
– Roommates, if you move to new apartments you always end up making new friends.

– Volunteering

– Spending a few nights at your local hostel

– Couchsurfing and Meetup

– Developing a new hobby through group classes

It’s really up to you, you don’t need to approach people out of the blue to befriend them. Show some interest and genuine curiosity, if it comes from the heart, it will work itself out. If you get rejection, then chances are you won’t want to hang out with someone who writes people off so fast.

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Beverly Johnson (48) (@lovydovybevy) 4 years, 8 months ago ago

These are great suggestions. Thank you! I want to volunteer somewhere with kids as well since I hope to be a youth counselor on a cruise ship next year, so that’s a perfect opportunity. 

As I told Remi below, I will be taking meetup more seriously and really try to go to a group meeting sometime soon. Ah and thank you for mentioning couchsurfing! I heard about it a while ago from a friend of a friend and I had forgotten the name! That’s gonna come in handy when I decide to do some seriously traveling on my own. :) 

Do they have hostels in the U.S.? Lol, I think that’s a UK thing. x) 

Thanks so much dude! I appreciate you. 

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Rising (3) (@Rising) 4 years, 8 months ago ago

Hey Beverly, here are two other options. You may want to check out if there are any Toast Masters clubs around your vicinity. And for volunteering another good idea is to look for opportunities on indeed.com, I have seen posts from organizations looking for volunteers.

Best of luck to you!

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putmyname (0) (@putmyname) 4 years, 8 months ago ago

I know aye! I just turned 24, and we are at that awkward age. Everyone takes their friends for granted, they’re too “busy” with their careers or dating. I think, you need to find comfort with yourself – then you happen to find people naturally. I’ve experienced so many potential good friends, but it’s always like a matchstick spark, where the friendship goes really well and just dies off. I really think that it helps to make yourself as your friend first. Learn to understand yourself better and you’ll never have to depend on anyone as much anymore.

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Beverly Johnson (48) (@lovydovybevy) 4 years, 8 months ago ago

Hmm. I do understand myself. I’m introverted so I find value in solitude probably more than anyone. I love who I am, and I do believe that I am the most important person in my life. I know that taking care of myself will have a chain reaction on the way I treat other people, the people I will attract in my life, and the way my life unfolds. So, it’s not so much about depending on anyone… it’s just good to have friends to share experiences with, talk things through, and for emotional stability.

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Mountain-Sage (0) (@gab5353) 4 years, 8 months ago ago

For me, the place that made me meet the most people, and have been a lovely place where I could meet great beings, is in festivals. Because there’s often a lot of people in festivals, you’ll most likely find people that resonate with you. For me, it always been electronic music festivals, but all kind of festivals does. It’s sure bether if it fits your interest but is not of primary importance. When I go to music festival, I’m here first for the people.

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Beverly Johnson (48) (@lovydovybevy) 4 years, 8 months ago ago

Hey! Omg I love festivals :0 I’m going to one in a couple weeks out here in SD :) 
I guess one difference between me and you is that my first priority when I go to a festival is the music. I absolutely LOVE music. Ugh, no LOVE is still not even enough to explain the way I feel about music. It’s everything for me. So music festivals are my favorite events to attend. 
This next one I go to, I will focus also on the people around me. I have met cool people at festivals, but they’re usually out of the way so the only times I see them again is at another festival, lol. But SD should be a lot of locals. Hit me up if your going to CRSSD Fest :) 
Thanks for your input <3

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Jared.L (3) (@Jared.L) 4 years, 8 months ago ago

I think the best way to make friends is based on your inerests. Go to places where you can find people with similar interests as yours.

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Nora (1) (@Noracat) 4 years, 7 months ago ago

I have the same issue :) I am planning to go to some courses and maybe find some interesting people there though I am really hard at making friends. 

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UniversalSoldier (2) (@UniversalSoldier) 4 years, 7 months ago ago

how about making a list of the things you like to do in your live and go to those places, most likely you’d meet people that are passionate about those things there. Or, just visiting an online forums about things and stuff you like, and hang out with people there?

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