I am either the bug or the windshield, and it varies through the day i’ll feel great and then sometimes I will just feel like nothing. And when I get my head back into my creative the world is beautiful mind set then I feel very guilty for ever feeling that I didn’t want to be apart of the grand scheme. Honestly life is sometimes always in your face with testing you and breaking you down. It’s tiring to have to build yourself up each day but when I do feel good again I just want to cry and ask for forgiveness for feeling sour about living…. It’s odd. I feel like I don’t deserve to be as happy as I get but I really do….it’s just hard to stay focused and be the best every day. One day I feel like everything and the next I just want to hide…
Is this me just finding myself? I feel like each day I find a little more of me… is that weird? Sometimes I just don’t know what to do with myself.
I understand where you’re coming from. When I start to feel this way I go on a little adventure to find music from artists I’ve never heard before and it usually ends up pretty good and I find something new. Which I can then share with friends to see if they have ever heard of it.
for me, kind of the same scenario’s. when i achieve what needs to be done, bliss. when i fuck up, im a cockroach skittering across the floor.
re-assessing situation’s help me to look at the same problems from a different angle.
understanding that little losses are still a part(main factors) of the big win is the goal of my transitions from darkness to light.