So growing up i was raised by my mother. She always just dropped me off to my grandma’s for work or pool, allot of the time she was gone for no reason. now there is a massive communication barrier. I pretty much have to argue with her to just get her to speak to me. is this healthy should i even be living like this. I have no idea who my mother even is anymore. and she has no idea who even i am. what can i do.
Accept, I was born unwanted from a rape, I lived at home till 15th and moved out. During those 15 years I moved 45 times houses.
I have issues of course, yet I love a cloud, a butterfly etc. Even when life is not what you wanted it to be, and even life can be painful. There’s allways a continue..
Don’t compare with what’s normal. Accept. This is you’re path. Don’t compare. This is your life
There’s a good chance, you’re mother was raised like you. We have family patterns we have karma, destiny. And
I can say hello to you. Free and alive :-)
And you can smile, if you want too
It is not healthy if you desire to have some significance within the relationship between the two of you. That is the first question you must ask yourself (which you may already have and may have already answered). What do you want from the relationship with your mother. If the answer is something greater than how it stands now, then I would certainly encourage you to try. But what you must first realize is that she, or anyone, is not placed here to make you happy or fulfilled. Only you can achieve that.
I have had a poor relationship with my father most of my life. I have at the same time had a great relationship with my mother, but had to confront her about a serious, destructive issue. I do not know the extent of the conversations (or arguments) you’ve had with your mother or the knowledge you have gained, but you must be fully aware that there is probably something significant she may be struggling with. Maybe you know it, maybe you don’t. That doesn’t matter so much initially. Maybe it will reveal itself at some point. You must approach her with unwavering love and acceptance of the person she is now. Approach it with the understanding that any attempt at breaking down the barriers and building a better relationship will not be easy.
Maybe initially, a good option is bridging the gap between the two of you with an activity that you will both enjoy and build up some trust. You know your relationship with her the best so you will know if this is possible or not, but there is no harm in proposing something. If, and when, you decide to reach deeper, you must remain conscious of what you truly desire to have with her and the love that is there, and refrain from arguing. If you would like to ask further questions, please feel free.