I’ve found that, depending on who I’m associating with, I mirror whatever is being projected to me– I think on a subconscious level– and I’m not entirely sure how to go about it. Another way I interpret this similarly goes as follows: certain people bring out the aspects in me that happen to be theirs. Like, I–by default– am catering to others’ egos or, to some degree, needs. I would love to just be myself entirely, but it seems that can only happen when I’m alone, or perhaps, I need to meet someone to bring me out–like someone of mental mutuality. Does anyone else do this?
“You are not two people. And you are not one person. You are an experience. Make sure you’re a good experience. Now, go. Have. Fun”
This quote from Steven Universe seems appropriate. There is no “myself”. You are a continuum of experience, an emergent yet intrinsic feature of a happening. Much like a mirror, you are always reflecting the world back at itself, and the world is constantly reflecting you back at yourself. Think too much on it, and you’ll become as frustrated as if you tried to count the infinite reflections created by two mirrors facing each other. Trust me, it becomes easier when you stop obsessing over which you is real and honest, and which you is false and pretentious. Its all you, and none of it is.