Yeah so I don’t exactly know where to start with this, probably because nowhere is the best place. It may seem like a silly idea, maybe even downright depressing. Alas, that is a bias you have. I’m the fucking narrator right now, you’re going to listen to me. I don’t claim to know anything, if I do it’s a foolish thought fleeting through the river of nonsense I’ll be spouting.
Okay, now that’s out of the way. About to drop some history on your ass; Freud suggested that people are inherently evil shitheads out for only selfish gain.
Marcuse suggested that the suppression of our emotions and expressions made us evil and selfish fucks. Whereas if we were capable of releasing all that tension from all those pent up emotions we were afraid to express we would reveal that we are all loving selfless people. Ernhard found that people were nothing at the core of their being, neither good nor bad.
Through my nihilistic/existentialist adventures I lean towards what Ernhard said. Then I thought about this farther and realized that the idea of Death Anxiety wasn’t about about death at all; It’s a fear of nothingness.
DONT RUN YET, we just got to the fun stuff. Nothingness frees us from bias, there is no good or evil. There is no negativity. You might think but in nothing meaning is void as well! Fuck yes it is! NO THAT IS NOT A BAD THING! That is NOTHING.
BACK TO NOTHINGNESS ANXIETY! So, we don’t want to feel like our lives are without meaning. It’s kind of frightening I know. We are capable of doing all kinds of lame things that distract us from that fear. Some people use people, some use material consumption, some use religion, social media, instant messaging, whatever.
I shall propose an analogy!
As an artist I would say nothingness would be the be the emptiness of a blank canvas, it’s my job to make the best of what I have. I will utilize personal experience and aspirations to create this painting! It will mean something to me, I will create something of meaning, recreate what I dislike and apply certain techniques that I learn along the way.
You know what? Everyone has their own painting, or whatever it is they can relate to. Maybe you build a house, or a write a musical masterpiece, or a master chef’s dish. I DONT KNOW. Let this be a humble lesson that you don’t know what’s going on in that asshole’s life. You may be the kindest of kind, but if you look at someone else’s painting and judge it without understanding it, then you have some reflection on your own painting to do.
Lest we forget that beneath it all lies the unremitting reminder that it’s something sitting atop nothing and can be wiped off or burned away. All that effort for what? An attempt at living a life with meaning, life as art.
If you don’t decide your meaning, the environment will for you.