Are there things about yourselves that you are afraid or ashamed of? How do you deal with them? What do they mean?
It really scares me sometimes that I can smile or feel joy at someone’s misery. I feel like a total emotional vampire and can’t make out why and what is it for. The natural response would be that I’m making out for the stuff that I dislike about myself or the stuff I lack. But on the other hand I can be the most devoted friend and honestly try to make their life more pleasant. Any hints?
The thing I’m currently having trouble with is some days I’ll be feeling totally fine, and then I will think of a situation or person who has wronged me in the past, and the rage builds up into a crescendo. I know I’m just upsetting myself, I’m recalling these memories of times I should’ve stuck up for myself and fought back, and there is no external stimulus present. I’m just making myself angry with my own thoughts. This is something I’d like to quit.