Z B (@zooneyvt) 10 years, 2 months ago

would like to start a vomit writing thread, everyone just write, dont think about what your writing, dont even read what other people have written until you vomit wrote here yourself, let it out, if you doubt writing something, especially write it “dont fight it, WRITE IT!!!” I’ll start!

cataclysm worked through the dawn of my minds own tragedy with a deathly grin for the truth of spirit within creatures mounting to the descending doom of our own lives. we seek out the forgotten ones in truth and deed and in what we have left undone wisking away the beckoning cries of our yesteryear. we only know what we want to know with what we have to do creeping forth our own emotional boundaries tieing up our thoughts with rusty chains i beat out the truth of my ageless fervor portruce beings perverting wellsprings of knowledge… (and the sick mind continues to infinite)

August 3, 2012 at 12:25 pm
Ian Wells (10) (@ian322attack) 10 years, 2 months ago ago

BLAARRGGHHFFF And then the piano cried back. Each chord is a different story. Each note is a different feeling. Pulsing into my ears I hear the waves of sound ignite my emotion unlike any string of words. Instead of a string of words, vibrating strings of pressure do the talking now. I’ve never been good with words and now I don’t have to be. Just press play and you hear it while you feel it. The sense of belonging thrown at your ears. It bring you round and round until you’re too dizzy. Fly off and explode because that’s all right to do. You’re not dying but the truth is you have. It’s a different death that opens new doors and explores new pores. And suddenly death is okay. Not that you want to die but it’s just okay. The violin cries and the piano dies bursting colorful music into what you see as space. Dance in it. Sing in it. You are invincible in it.

Olivia (90) (@lolivia) 10 years, 2 months ago ago

I live my life, like so many others, in a trance. I walk below the vast, endless blue sky and see nothing but sky. Just sky. So deeply engrained in my mind that I think nothing of it, or above it. I move on. I forget that I am one of 7 billion monkeys who inhabit a flying rock through space. I move on, I see nothing but faces. Faces whom I know think and feel, but I forget. They’re just faces, and nothing more. I forget the small intricacies of nature and am trapped in my thoughts of the past and the future. If I’m not here, right now, where am I? I’m nowhere.

Z B (53) (@zooneyvt) 10 years, 2 months ago ago

@mercurial, i feel your dick in my mind, stretching my my mental butthole XD care to elaborate on your statement (are you eluding to that the past present and future exist simultaneously? i remember seeing in what the bleep do we know i think how they are talking about how there is no reason why we shouldnt be able to view the future like we do the past, something relating to that maybe?) i am thoroughly mindfucked -_-

Jeslyn (594) (@jeslyntweedie) 10 years, 2 months ago ago

Holy shit. Orson Scott Card’s Ender’s Series, are painting himself and all main characters involved in stories of learning along the same path to moral clarity. His own metaphorical interpretation of his own journey through the lens of science fiction- when you can hide such things in that way, and yet still teach stories of moral justice.

He is fucking writing a version of the bible, of religion, of science, technology, art, systematic thinking and empathetic thinking and altruism.

He is a fucking genius.

I want to write a science fiction novel.

This is the thought that struck me a few minutes ago, thank you for providing this thread to vomit write it out!

Z B (53) (@zooneyvt) 10 years, 2 months ago ago

Porcupine anal twist super hair oral fruit of the loom squidward pineapple cord justice apeshit penis lice finding magnificent sentries eating globules of frozen pizza dough smoking crack with hippies finding the only desert we only find in ourselves blank slates of imagination pork filthy token prizes expression amiably forlorn pizza cranberry wisdom teaching us throw out the guidelines of youth ample time for the unjust beheading of quick judgement open your eyemind to what is out there and smoke some crack/worship satan

Gibs (5) (@gibs) 10 years, 2 months ago ago

Too much Penn & Teller BUllshit in this building, I hear the sounds coming from my roommates and somehow Im hesitiating if all of that shit is bullshit perhaps they are aswell. Maybe should make a program about bullshitting the bullshitters or somethin,
Im allready losing my faith in recycling and in the good of dalai lama and gandhi, not even to talk about selfhelp, yoga and all that kind of stuff.. Or maybe theyre just tryin to explain there are too many people trying to make money out of it and the whole concept isnt such a bad thing..

cynikal (6) (@cedricb) 10 years, 2 months ago ago

Painting a man’s self portrait. Not me, no I am just a brush, used by the man’s indelicate fingers. Artistry is what I want, but what I dream of, is a real self portrait, one where I can shine, not only by making others shine, but by showing my own true greatness!

Milo (57) (@milo) 10 years, 2 months ago ago

Oh yo my name is Milo and I’m
Unemployed right now but thats okay.
Lack of minimum wage dont get in my way
Cause I do what I want and I just dont care
I burn alot of trees but I’m homies with Smoky Bear
But now I gotta stop tokin due too lack of funds
When my parents ask I’ll say I retired young.

And you can be sure I aint wastin my time
cause I prematurely ejaculated this sick nasty rhyme.

Anonymous (481) (@) 10 years, 2 months ago ago

Theres never any way to comprehend the feeling of standing at the top of the peak of your own life, looking down both sides, not wanting to continue downward, but you must continue, the journey down the hill is much more pleasant than the journey upward.

Skye (1,627) (@skye) 10 years, 2 months ago ago

Sams a bitch. She runs around like she owns the place. Im chasing rainbows here. Maybe oneday I’ll be a millionaire from all the gold I find. Caves are so frightening. Monsters live in the dark staligment depths of them. Sam belongs there. Perhaps oneday the rain will rain just to give her a fucking rainbow. How special.

hector (18) (@hector) 10 years, 2 months ago ago

I can’t comprehend modern society and their ability to hate and destroy beautiful things for moments of momentary happiness and monetary gain
I long for the day when children are taught to love and appreciate everything we’ve been given in this world, when thousands of people can stand together without saying a word, simply appreciating the infinite beauty of the pouring rain

Anonymous (2,654) (@) 10 years, 2 months ago ago

I’ve felt this before. Jealous of tomorrow and burdened by a moment ago. What’s left was what was. I’m sensing inconvenience. Too soon to happen and too late until it doesn’t. What’s on my mind? How does it feel? I’m automatic. And it feels good.

Smoking a cigarette.

Brandon P’naantan Pinkney (321) (@hlalhabattu) 10 years, 2 months ago ago

(ahem) I miss the 90s, time for a time machine, puck me up daddy and take me on a jolly adventure in shpace time…I think it is time to quantabulate my existence, very existence hmmm. I’m thinking is it worth the effort to bring forth screws and ladders and pinecones a plenty? this darned keyboard and it’s vershniggity<—not a word. such music

Ellie (1,363)M (@tangledupinplaid21) 10 years, 2 months ago ago

Harsh solar wind, stars for a stare
I am all here but I am not there
Ransacked intentions and giggling blame
I sleep, breathe, and run the same
Put my mind on hiatus, send it away packing
then perhaps the spirit will find what’s lacking.

Nebulae stretching in smiling repose
Neither night nor day come to a close
Unrelentingly relevant and practically insignificant
Assign and confine, space remains indifferent.

“The self is the only prison that can ever bind the soul”
Its beauty crippled by an illusory role
With unabashed vulnerability I’ll bring yours out
and identity-less we will dance and shout!

My heart may stop, the world will turn
Stoic as the fire of the flux does burn
Disintegrating, sinking back into the earth
as these atoms patiently await rebirth.

TheSkaFish (962)M (@theskafish) 10 years, 2 months ago ago

My rough draft of season 1 of my sci-fi graphic novel is now due on my illustrator friend’s desk in less than one month. I am planning to have it done, but I am behind – nevertheless I have to, because he too is excited about the project and I don’t want to let him down. But I find it hard to slip into that universe when I am mired in this one…..too much is happening at once, and yet, it figures, because I haven’t done anything about it in so long. Sticking one’s head in the sand just makes you an easy dinner. Cheezus Christ on toast…..how am I already 26? This can’t be right. It gets me down when I think people, other humans just like me, have done fantastic things by this age. Do I just have zero potential? Should I just get another office job again, because that’s what I have a degree in, is that where I belong even though I hate it and don’t want to be another normal, boring professional? Should I just do it and deal with it through alcohol and video games and just accept that I might never have had a life to throw away? Can’t decide what to do, I just don’t care about stupid jobs and I don’t believe in the afterlife. I’m about to get fucked out of the last of what little money I’ve got, why can’t the bastards of the world ever let up? Too bad, cause for a while I managed to stop being angry, guess that’s over. Sometimes I feel it takes me 4 times as long to learn the basics of life as most people do, but my mother tells me I’m not retarded, just lazy. Why can’t I think of more fun things to do? I’ve tried to hide from the future with herb, drinking, and sleeping in, and yet, I feel it has finally arrived. Tomorrow morning I’ll help one of my last and best friends in the area move away. We didn’t play nearly enough Star Wars rpg this summer as I’d hoped. I still haven’t swam yet once this year. Just found out a girl I’ve liked for years is moving east, but it’s not forever and she thought of me enough to invite me to her going away party – don’t know if I’ll go, I’ve been scared to talk to her for a month, thanks to my subconscious our relationship has always been a little strange. It’s been so long since I’ve felt anything except beaten…..I’d like to get up but can’t tell which way up is, or remember what up feels like. Tomorrow’s another day, would I just learn something this time…

Thunderfeet (161) (@thunderfeet) 8 years, 3 months ago ago

Wow man… I know this post is over two years old but it still made my eyes water because some days I feel exactly the same. Stay Strong Brother, We’re in this together!

TheSkaFish (962)M (@theskafish) 8 years, 3 months ago ago

@thunderfeet, yea, I was in a pretty bad funk at the time. In some ways I still am, in some ways things have changed.

– I’ve found that I haven’t been able to dive into my creative endeavors fully because of the anxiety I have of not working. It’s a constant source of arguments at home and just makes the mood really tense. So I’ve decided to just bite the bullet and try to get a job in business, my major. It may very well suck for a while, but every night I will relentlessly pursue my creative dreams. It will work out. Instead of worrying about being a boring professional / alcoholic, I’ll focus on what I DO want instead. As I look back on life I realized I spoiled a lot of time that could have been fun if I’d only focused on what I did want instead of what I didn’t. I guess I have to take care of myself now financially, but I still want to do guitar, writing, and drawing. And who knows what else. It’ll happen.

– I’m now almost 28. Aging hasn’t gotten any easier, that’s for sure. I just try not to worry about it. I’m still on the younger side of 30, so I’m happy with that. I am worried more about my family, who have all gotten older. Particularly my grandmother and my dog. But I am very happy and thankful they are around. I try to treat any day that they are here as a good day and wish them all the best.

– I’m a little less angry and a little more focused. I believe much more now that I can create a good life for myself, that I can figure it all out. I’ve even gone as far as to thin down my music collection and give away anything that’s too angry. I just want to surround myself with a you-can-do-it mindset.

– I’ve also given my bowl away, I no longer smoke anything at all. I still drink, but only ever so often. I wake up in the morning now instead of sleeping in, and I exercise 6 days a week.

– I’ve since lost interest in that girl, gotten interested in 3 more that were actually way closer to what I’d been searching for all along, talked to them a little bit and one in particular a lot, only to watch them all go from single to taken. That sucks. But I guess I’ll just ride it out. There’s no guarantee they’ll be taken forever. I can figure this out too.

And so can you figure out anything you wish. I’m hammering into my head daily the idea that anything that others have done, you can do. It’s possible.

Thanks for the toast of strength, I wish you it as well!

How about you? What are some of your dreams? How did you find yourself feeling the same way, and how are you doing now?

Thunderfeet (161) (@thunderfeet) 8 years, 3 months ago ago

Wow, it definitely seems like you’ve been through a lot and that the hard times have helped you grow. I agree that getting a job will help your creative output. when I started working after I was done high school I started really appreciating my free time and using it for more productive things than playing video games. 28 is still very young, so it’s good your getting over the whole age thing before you’ve spent to much time worrying about. I turn 20 in a little over a month which I guess for some people would be a big deal but for me I’m more excited for all the new experiences adult hood brings. That’s good that your less angry, I’ve seen firsthand how anger can consume people and it’s not pretty. Was it hard to thin down your music collection? I always have trouble deleting songs from my ipod even if I barely listen to them, but I’ve been making an effort to delete the music that doesn’t have any meaning and downloading more spiritual and positive stuff. What made you decided to quit smoking? and are you quitting permanently? There was a time in high school when I was smoking weed all day every, it was only for a couple months but I really noticed that some negative affects built up after a while. After that I didn’t smoke for a year which was great, I completely forgot what it was like to be stoned and I felt much more clear headed. Since then I’ve only been smoking occasional, just a couple times a month and I decided I was smoking to much I would stop for more than a month. There was a longer time period than I would have like where I had a friend crashing on my couch because he got kicked out and I was smoking everyday, but I haven’t smoked since then and I’m feeling great.
Girls are one of those areas of life that I’ve pretty much stayed away from, I had some experiences in middle school but after that I didn’t have the confidence and then I didn’t care for a while. I recently decided that I was ready for an adult relationship and there’s this girl that I’m interested in but she’s very busy with work so I haven’t gotten to see her yet. That’s shitty that all three girls got taken, hopefully it works out but if not there’s so many girls out there and I’m sure you’ll find the right one.
It sounds like your definitely getting shit figured out.
As for me, I’ve sort of measure my progress by a few mile stones. The first would be starting high school which was a very difficult time for me because I went from a tiny private school where I had grown up with pretty much all of the kids in my class to a huge school where I didn’t know anyone yet everyone else seemed to know each other. I struggled with low confidence for a while and I had a hard time dealing with the isolation. Things started looking up when I started working out in Grade 11. Then Grade 12 I made the decision to make the year memorable, and I did, but the way I went about it probably wasn’t the best because I started smoking and selling a lot of weed so I was always involved in some social event or another. Which brings to me the next important milestone. Getting expelled. I got searched illegally by my principal and he found my weed, I was really co-operative because I knew I was fucked anyways but I ended up only getting charged with possession with a conditional discharge after a year of probation.
Most people would view that situation as negative but for me it was something that I needed to go through as it got me started on a path of self discovery. I did a lot of growing while I was out of school that I had a very hard time with alienation when they let me back the next fall. I was very uncomfortable around people for the longest time and even when things were going well in a social setting I would still prefer to be by myself.
During that time I forgot what it was like to really connect with some one, but then I did LSD for the first time back in April. I didn’t have any visuals so my friend that I did it with, who I hadn’t seen since before I got expelled, said I should have done more but I disagreed because I had the most profound experience just learning how to have a conversation and connect with the other person. Since then I’ve been feeling like I’m ready for anything and that all the time between being expelled and doing LSD was mostly preparing and learning.
The only thing that I really dream about is just making the world a better place, at times it seems like a hard task but there’s also so many ways to make positive change so I feel like as long as I do something it will help.
It’s weird some days I just wake up feeling unmotivated and thinking that nothing I do is important so why bother. These really shitty days seem to come and go at random so I try not to let them affect me. I’m doing pretty good today even though I haven’t really been doing a lot, but for me that’s fine because I prefer to do what comes naturally everyday and then just let it build into something much larger after a long period of time.
And thanks for sharing your situation with me, it definitely helped me write about myself in a way that provided some clarity to me.

TheSkaFish (962)M (@theskafish) 8 years, 3 months ago ago

@thunderfeet, well, I don’t want to come off as saying I’ve had it hard. I wouldn’t really say that was the case. It’s more like, I made things harder than they really were because I had a lot of negative beliefs about life and myself, and some bad habits.

I hear that about appreciating the free time more once you are working. Also, it will just ease the tension going on at home. It’s hard for me to relax and get into a good creative flow when I’m always getting yelled at about not making money. Once that is taken care of, I’ll have a little more breathing room.

When it comes to video games, I’m a little less extreme than some – I wouldn’t say they are all bad for you. I’d say it’s okay to play them sometimes, as long as you don’t do it all the time. Moderation is key, I’d say.

As far as the music, I wouldn’t say it was too hard to give it away. I gave away a lot of CDs from bands that were too angry, political, cynical/sarcastic, or pessimistic for me because that’s not what I want to focus on, those topics bring me down. I want to focus on things that energize me, and give me a zest for life. Kind of like you said, a positive, meaningful feeling. Or just stuff that is fun.

With the smoking, I think I am done for good. I am mostly referring to cannabis, though I smoked a little tobacco which I am absolutely done with. Weed just drained my energy and made me lazy, dumb, and feel really unhealthy. I wanted to get creative or philosophical insights from it, but I couldn’t think clearly on it, and really only ever came away with the munchies. It just wasn’t working for me, and I looked in a bowl one day and saw all the resin and figured, I really don’t want my lungs looking like this. So I quit, and feel more energetic for it. I think people should be able to have it if they want but I don’t think it’s for me.

I also have a little psychedelic experience under my belt, and unlike weed, they are something that I would re-visit. I had intensely visual experiences and giddy, tingling, electrical feelings. But what I learned from the trip really, is that I need to do more with my life before I trip again. It sounds like you really had a good takeaway from yours though, learning how to make a real connection. That’s the stuff.

Idk about the girls. It’s really tough just waiting for them to be single again. But I haven’t met anyone since who even comes close to standing out from the crowd like them. Only time will tell. I hope your own girl situation works out though. I can imagine it’s awesome just knowing someone you actually want chooses you too.

I guess what it comes down to, for me, you, and anyone really, is remembering that you can do what you want and keeping your eyes on the prize. The shitty feelings of unmotivation may come and go, but if you keep going they’ll get less with time. Even doing the smallest thing. I know it’s helped me.

20 is a great age too, I wish I could go back to it. Sounds like you’ll have lots of time to grow into who you want to be.

jm (23) (@kkylekittell24) 10 years, 2 months ago ago

Just do it nigga. Nike got it right the whooooole time. You just gootttta dooo iittt niggggga~!!! zhhh PPPOOOOOOOOFFFF.

TheSkaFish (962)M (@theskafish) 10 years, 2 months ago ago

@jeslyntweedie, offtopic but do you read other sci fis? Feel free to let me know some recommendations.

Jeslyn (594) (@jeslyntweedie) 10 years, 2 months ago ago


Also, The Golden Compass series; though aimed at children, read with a symbolic lens- there is a lot to discover there, and is actually a parallel story to the Ender’s Series- interestingly enough.

Both have child protagonists who must accomplish a seemingly impossible task, but will only be able to succeed if they don’t know they are the only ones able to accomplish such a thing- must do it ignorantly, without realizing they’re doing it- kind of thing.

An interesting parallel. Could just be to exemplify human curiosity. I don’t know.

Oh- but also the male and female themes in both.

Ender’s Series= Ender is Peter(Male) and Valentine(Female), their feminine and masculine tendencies together.

Golden Compass Series= ‘daemons’ that are part of a person, and are almost always the opposite gender.

Idk, these are all just stories. We can learn a lot from stories though… Parallels like this have happened throughout history. Varying time spans. We like to tell the same basic stories…why would that be do you think?

Odysseus in the Iliad and Jesus in the Bible. So strikingly similar, yet written at completely different times with different metaphors. But the central themes/events are almost the same.

Yep. Ah literature- I get lost in it sometimes. In a good way.

Z B (53) (@zooneyvt) 10 years, 2 months ago ago

@theskafish, you are too concerned about your own self interest, think about what you can do for the world, not what it can do for you. “The only life worth living is a life lived for others” ~Hellen Keller. Check out the book “The Children of the Law of One & The Lost Teachings of Atlantis” ~Jon Peniel. It will change your life… :D

TheSkaFish (962)M (@theskafish) 10 years, 2 months ago ago

@zooneyvt, i guess…..but as they say, you can’t love others until you learn to love yourself, or even, you can’t give value to others if you don’t have anything to give away. This is vomit writing, and I was feeling more cathartic than artistic at the moment, and I felt it was very therapeutical to write down everything that was on my mind. I feel it helps to put one’s problems on paper and actually look at them, the mind can be so cluttered at times like a dissheveled room. And as a matter of fact I did help others today, I helped my friends move to a new home, I was only paid in pizza and it was totally ok, fun even.

It is not that I am greedy. It’s just that I worry that life will pass me by, or that I don’t have it in me to be more than ordinary in the first place. I don’t want life to be a dull chore…..I’d like to fill it with good memories and achieve exceptional feats, to unlock the full potential of my mind and to reaffirm to myself that I’m ALIVE!!!!!

@jeslyntweedie, thanks, I’ll have to give those books a look when I have more time. Right now my biggest sci fi influence is Star Wars, I really think it does a lot of things well but I feel that in order to make a good story myself I should have more than one influence.

Ben (148) (@cognizantelephant) 10 years, 2 months ago ago

Anything can happen. Anything will happen. Anything has happened.

To whom? To you.

Pilgrim (7) (@thedevin16) 10 years, 2 months ago ago

The stage has been set, the actor laid out in their spots. All the crowd stares in wonder, in anxious wonder. They stare and stare and stare again, the actors dance and prance their act of acts. Let’s do a dance for that. I am the light that shines the stage, the actors dance beneath my cage. My light rays of bars of gold, wear they are you won’t be cold.

Jon Leo (78) (@d503) 10 years, 2 months ago ago

Fungi are genetically far more advanced than any animal life. They are capable of evolution in a single lifetime at a level that animals can only exhibit between species and over countless generations. Fungal mycelia in forest floors display a collective consciousness that interpenetrates entire geographical regions. The world’s largest organisms are not Blue Whales but subterraneal fungal cultures such as the one under Utah.

Florida contains the Florida Aquafleur, which is colonized by a fungal behemoth. All drinkable and pottable water come from the Aquafleur which means that in Florida, we interact with this creature on a daily basis, exchanging fluids with it. If it chose to, it could kill us. We probably ingest its spores on a continual basis.

For those of you who are not familiar with the power contained in a fungal spore I urge you to look up the cordyceps. Cordyceps are fungi that are capable of advanced mind control. When infected by the spores, insects find their insides being eaten up slowly but, more horrifically, they experience a loss of free will. The ‘parasite’ essentially takes over all body functions and causes the host to seek out locations and conditions that are ideal for its own growth and development.

Our bodies are interpenetrated with fungi on every level. Some of these fungi are even clever enough to ‘mimic’ our cell structure and genetic information to appear as our own cells. We all have fungi in our brains that can only exist in brains due to the harmony between cerebral chemistry and this mushroom’s nutritional requirements. When we die, this brain fungus matures into a mushroom that eats the remainder of our brain.

All death and decay on the planet Earth is caused by fungi. You might say that other animals and microbes are responsible but they can only be seen as intermediate steps, eventually all biomass on earth goes through a fungal decay stage. Many of the physical processes we are familiar with are catalysed or entirely caused by fungi. Fungi are capable of colonizing clouds and controlling rainfall and causing iron to rust.

As humans, we are outgunned and outmanned by this civilization. We’re allowed to exist because they’ve allowed us to. We’re useful to them. Why? In any apocalyptic scenario, fungi would survive and repopulate the earth in its own way.

Alex (12) (@alexico) 10 years, 2 months ago ago

letting go of holding on to something long beyond its worth to tempt my eyes or change my course ill find me again inside the outside reflections bounce and transfer love while angels fall beyond the sky to show us where the nothing takes us if we lose our faces like a misplaced sweater makes you sweat like the ocean tide is sneaking up from behind and pulling you to swim within the folds of feathers dancing in the sky to lay you gently on the banks of your imaginations depths to grace a place where no one sees.

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