I’d like to get a glimpse into what your guys’s Vices are and how you think about and/or deal with them on a day to day basis =D
Mine are manipulation and masturbation….
1.an immoral or evil habit or practice.
2. immoral conduct; depraved or degrading behavior: a life of vice.
3. sexual immorality, especially prostitution.
4. a particular form of depravity.
5. a fault, defect, or shortcoming: a minor vice in his literary style.
@luisfabian, sloth. But I’m in the process of overcoming it.
I wish you luck on beating your vices though. There’s a whole thread of “no masturbation” on here, that offers pretty good insight into quitting. I’ve quit myself and I feel great.
It used to be lying for me, I would rarely tell the truth. I felt the need to always make myself look better and I notice it occasionally creeps back into my thoughts but rarely gets away from there now :) Truth is better.
Currently… Altered states of consciousness i.e. drugs. My vice and I have a rather interesting relationship. I don’t really think of it as my vice, but others see it as that. It has gotten me into some trouble in the past, but I blame the government. I feel I have grown immensely since I began smoking weed and using various other substances. After first dropping LSD I found this site and got into self improvement, philosophy, meditation, and a deeper sense of love than I have ever known. I love entheogens to the point where I think about them daily.
It also scares me sometimes and I wonder if it is really the path I should be taking. I also worry one day about going too far and trying drugs I know won’t facilitate my growth, but lead to an addiction. Thus shitting on my life. Currently I stay away from stuff like Heroin, Meth, Coke, etc. but they definitely intrigue me.
I could also see my shyness as being a vice as well, I have a hard time opening up and being comfortable around people. I just don’t trust easily and would rather confide in myself and my few good friends. I have social anxiety as my psychologist stated, but really I don’t seem to like most people
great thread :D
@avernus, “It also scares me sometimes and I wonder if it is really the path I should be taking. I also worry one day about going too far and trying drugs I know won’t facilitate my growth, but lead to an addiction. Thus shitting on my life. Currently I stay away from stuff like Heroin, Meth, Coke, etc. but they definitely intrigue me.”
Not sure if you’ve done this, but check out Erowid.com ‘s reviews of various drugs. Or the HE user @thomaschong has some great drug reviews on here. Personally I’ve tried weed and psychs without getting an interest in the hard stuff, never been interested in it before and still aren’t after the reviews. The effects just don’t seem that interesting and certainly not worth the risk.
@theskafish, <3 erowid, my first place to go when I hear of a new substance or debate trying one. Invaluable to anyone trying a drug.
I agree the effects are less interesting sounding, but some unique ones are out there. I tend to think "what if I tried this once?" Ketamine being the top of my maybe list :/
I'm pretty confident I can stay away from meth and heroin though – its just their effects are interesting, not that I want to do them. I plan to keep it that way but doubt always exists
@genovievefitzgerald, You have to see the term “wrong” for what it is: a person’s individual take on good and bad. You happen to be fine with masturbation, so to do it doesn’t seem like a vice or bad thing. If someone considers something bad and they do it anyway, and they find it disturbing that they receive joy from something they personally view in a negative light, it’d be a vice for them.
For me, I guess I could consider my vice to be pushing people’s buttons. As with my description, some may find it ok to provoke others to elicit reactions (or at least be able to justify it in some way) but I know I have a knack for it, know people aren’t in love with me for it, but I jus get this feeling of intrigue seeing my action cause a (seemingly) direction REaction.
Behavioral psychology, man…stuff’s legit.
My vice is telling the truth when it no longer seems like a virtue.
@lytning91, Aha, but for women is different if they masturbate. When they do it and share it, there are hundreds of men lining up to fantasize. You’re right though, it is an individual take on what’s good and bad. So why is everyone telling everyone how good would they feel if they try to be like them? What people do, especially when they say they want to ‘change’, is twisting the truth about themselves. Whatever good or bad something is, the individual take is the actual twist. That means if you are insecure about something you’ll have two options – try changing it so you’re secure about your nature according to the world or feel great about yourself that you are in control of your nature. In the end your only problem is going to be the forbidden fruit, good and bad at the same time.
@beyond, Those two options are kind of difficult to work with from my experience: changing to better fit the world around you makes you feel as though you changed for the wrong reasons, or at least it does for me. Makes me feel distanced from myself and therefore distanced from the world around me as well. Option 2 seems more appealing, but it is misleading, since we see that some of the world around us remains unaffected by the changes we make, which discourages our ability to positively impact the world at all. You in control of who you are, but what are you to the whole?
Identity has been on my mind recently, if you were not able to tell.
@genovievefitzgerald, well, I don’t know the specifics of it, different people claim it’s bad for different reasons. But I know how I feel myself, and when I used to do it, I always felt tired, drained, weak, and mentally foggy afterwards for the rest of the day, every time without fail. It was like giving myself a cold for a day. If something is making me feel bad either mentally or physically, I figure it means my body is telling me I shouldn’t do it. And I have quit, and feel more energetic, more able to focus, have less brain fog, and higher spirits. I figure that same energy I used to waste on lust could be redirected towards building up my life. Masturbation wasn’t solving my problems, it was prolonging them. The real issue is I wanted a girlfriend, and masturbation was putting a band-aid on the issue instead of telling myself, hey, you need to solve this.
Also, I feel that porn, even the mildest, is a poison for the mind.
I gamble, I am not in debt or anything from it but it doesn’t make life easier.
I also look at porn and bop the baloney. I don’t have a problem doing it but heaps of people look down on that sort of thing, but I don’t much care what they think, I just don’t make it a thing to talk about.
People say to use your sexual desire as a motivator to become successful, then you can use your success to afford all the pussy you want.
I figure I will do what I love to do and if I gain success from it then I will afford pussy, until then I will have needs and fill them. But I will not throw away the work I love for success, just to get pussy, that is not how I do things.
Often times I make it clear that I have no intention of hurting people’s feelings. I hate people crying, suffering, anything like that really. I’ve accepted that it is a byproduct of my up bringing as are the other two vices.
I make fun of people because my brother makes fun of me. I love my brother more than I love any other human I have ever encountered. He used to kick open my door, yell “C’mon faggot!”, then I would follow him to the Xbox, we would play games, and talk for hours.
I just started associating insulting people with invitations of bonding, laughter, and genuine appreciation.
A lot of the phenomenon is the intention behind it. When my brother makes fun of me. He is “making fun”. When other people insult me. They are trying to hurt my feelings.
To answer your question: I did not change my behavior I simply let people know that my intention was not to hurt them.
Not everyone finds that acceptable. That is unfortunate but nothing that makes me feel like I am a truly bad person.
I honestly think I am not a bad person. Yes I gossip and that makes me a pain in the ass to be friends with.
I ought to tell people I am bad with secrets. Less people would trust me…but they would be better off.
I make fun of people.
I tell them that it is my sense of humor. I have no intention of hurting anyone’s feelings.
I am spiteful.
In the context of a relationship I often “hold things in” and then they come forward in a sweeping series of poorly executed decisions.
I ought to communicate my issues more effectively even if it leads to unpleasantries.
@tall-sam, How is this a vice? I think it’s a good quality. Some people talk about everything, other people are silent with each other about everything. And those that have secrets are not trustworthy to begin with. It’s healthy to laugh at things instead of getting hurt. I can’t say I’m spiteful, but I am malicious when I lose my sense of humor. I wouldn’t call a vice something that just won’t make me a saint.