What’s the longest amount of time you’ve gone without looking at yourself in the mirror?
For me, I don’t know the real answer. I just know that when I’ve looked at myself less, I’ve come to love my body more truly and deeply, and I believe that I’ve reached my healthiest points when I haven’t regarded myself so often. So, I’m curious to know about others and whether or not you’ve felt the same effects.
I cut my own hair and shave only with my sense of touch for years. It saves a lot of time… The vanity I worry about is my posture when I’m tired, the fitness when I’m standing on my feet, the less tension and artificiality – the more natural my body manipulates the clothes I’m wearing, otherwise they wear me like I’m their reliable hanger. More importantly, unless the emotion I’m consumed by is reflecting on my face and gives away my evil plans to steal the coldest of heart with illusive charm and inhuman cruelty, I don’t give a shit about stupid mirrors unless I’m someone’s favorite libertine fetishist and perverted psychopath reflecting my premature sexuality and delusions of adequacy.
Sooooo true. Sooooo true.
Oh my goodness, that was intense at the end! Very poetically written.
I’m not sure that I totally understand where you’re coming from, but that last part definitely resonates with me as this all-around destructive side of myself–one that I have worked hard on diminishing by ridding myself excessive attachment to my superficial exterior.
Yeah, I wasn’t even funny. I think the exterior is a reflection of our inner drives anyway because… without drives we’ll have no anima and animus. Something that will make us feel good to be alive or at least emotionally free without enchaining the inner giggle.
I’m losing my mind, though.
I just found this and it’s totally relevant. http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/10-signs-you-dont-love-yourself-enough-and-what-to-do-about-it/
We look good in the mirror when we’re truly happy. Actually we look good in the same picture if we’re truly happy and it never changes.
Nothing strange about that. If we’re happy we’d be our own inspiration for happiness and go looney!
Great article! Thank you for sharing!
As for the other part, you’d only go looney from a manic state, not a truly happy state. You know true and deep happiness by the reality of it–the reality that happiness is a constant practice, just like meditation (but perhaps a bit more complex). With time, it gets easier (or more stable, as the case sometimes is when coming from a manic state). Some days are better than others, sometimes you fall off the tracks and need to get back on again, and some days are pure bliss. For me, I would characterize true happiness not by constant smiles or laughter or pleasure, but by the notion that, if I died tomorrow, I would be truly happy with the life I’ve led–that it would be just as easy to stay and keep leading on with my life, as it would be to let go.
:) I adore my manic states, though. It’s my source of energy. I’ve decided golden middle ground is too greedy for me so I’d rather burn in flames than look pretty because a reflection said so. Who does it think it’s talking to? I metamorphosed.
I do love my manic states too, but after a while, they got exhausting and old for me. I was in my head too much, and in hindsight, I’m really grateful for the friends who stuck with me through it…because I can’t imagine them ever understanding a word of the rambles that made SO much sense to ME at the time.
The other part of life can be kind of boring sometimes, and I definitely look forward to and highly appreciate the times that life picks up speed in that ecstatic way again. However, I really do think I’d be crazy if I never allowed myself time to slow down and really internalize and put into practice all that I’d learned in all of those epiphany moments. And once the practice really starts (it started with the practice of listening for me), you’ve got plenty to do and experience and feel and understand in order to make your day fulfilling–it’s just different. Wayyyy less anxiety and sudden drops too.
You know what they say. “When you’re exhausted go to bed, you idiot.”
What’s wrong with being in your head? Yesterday people disgusted me and my defense mechanisms worked splendidly. I immediately started imagining beautiful female curves which lowered the threshold of my disgust.
When I started getting mad I instantly thought of hugging a beautiful friend and breathing deeply in her presence.
I do turn into an insanity wolf but the goal is the same. Rape anxiety and holocaust guilt. Reality should be people’s secret lover. Not their imaginary friend.
“Art: None. Because the function of art is to hold a mirror up to nature there can be no art because the Universe is infinite which means there simply isn’t a mirror big enough.” – “The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy’s definition of “Universe”
Ok, ok. Now that I’m remembering, that wasn’t totally accurate. Because I enjoy my current state better overall NOW, I forget that making that transition wasn’t really my choice. At the time, I really came to seek out these third eye visuals and epiphanies and head games I would play with myself–my preferred state was one big CEV. That was how I felt most alive! But at some point, the visuals just kind of stopped. It was sad at first, because I really didn’t feel special any more. But I needed some clarity, especially after life brought some BIG questions and challenges to the forefront. These would take much longer to process and would need a CLEAR head to do it. When I meditated and started doing a regular yoga practice, really caring for my body and my muscles while also learning to put into practice all that I believe in, my head was very clear. It was boring as hell–I mean, there was NOTHING in there!! But the challenge was to find bliss in this nothingness, because after a while, I realized it really was what I sought and needed on a deeper level. Now, my everyday life is the lucid part–I think and speak and listen clearly, which feels nice. It feels like stepping into reality for the first time.
Wow. I just woke up and had this thought again, that lately my dreams while asleep distract me rather than leave me well rested. I noticed that the only thing that leaves me restless is related to my memory. Fear of remembering or forgetting things. When I focus on that and recognize it as a fear my thoughts become a little more clearer.
Okay, that was random. It’s funny you say you stopped feeling special. When I have this feeling that my abilities are gone or that I don’t feel special ‘anymore’, I start thinking of my humbleness, despite all my ego issues, I wouldn’t want to be special if I was humble, so that’s what I was doing wrong. I needed too much to be ever at peace. :)
Not long, but I wouldn’t feel deprived without one. I know I am not my body so I don’t get upset anymore about criticizing my figure or anything. I have aesthetic preferences and I like to study alignment, but if you just stare at your own eyes and see your essence the rest of the features are secondary to your presence. Not wearing makeup has really helped me feel less self-conscious though because you have to find inner radiance which is mostly about giving out while staying in your center and that feels healthy.
So true!! That felt so good to read, I’m fucking melting. hahaha
When I stopped wearing makeup and was traveling without access to lengthy stares in the mirror, I would often open up the car mirror and just look in my own eyes. Super therapeutic. Sometimes, I will look at myself in the mirror while doing yoga to make sure that I’m in proper alignment, but I try not to do it too long. Otherwise, I really lose the feeling, the deep breathing, and the overall therapy in the stretch.
It’s like those days when you walk around feeling buoyant and positive, ready to take on anything because you’re completely confident in what you have to offer (mentally, as far as we can observe with our own eyes). Sometimes you meet a nice gal/guy and really hit it off. But, as you get home, you look in the mirror and you’ve had a huge pimple on your forehead or you wore your shirt backwards… anything and everything “wrong”, and suddenly your confidence about your entire day plummets.
I wish I didn’t look in the mirror as much as I do. But, I don’t necessarily look at myself with the concept of being attractive in mind. I more so do it to treat my body as good as I treat my mind. Look nice because I feel nice. Yet, there are those days where I am far too critical of myself… It just seems so hard to avoid reflections. I can avoid the mirror, but I still see my reflection as I approach my car, or in the microwave window, or anywhere else reflective. It’s hard to escape unless I escape the limitations of my mind as far as beauty… and this, this is something I’m striving towards.
I suppose I have always pretty much considered myself someone I live with, not me actually being me, like the third person perspective, and I have arguments and habits I don’t like about myself but over all I work to forge a solid relationship with me, mostly because I have to. (If that gem of schizophrenia helps :)
Doesn’t sound so schizophrenic to me. I enjoy the third person perspective too–I feel like all of the “imperfections” I’ve grown up with were never really mine to worry about. And when I came to respect my body more deeply, many of the things I was mildly self-conscious about no longer seemed to be a problem. It’s all a work in progress, of course, and everything comes in waves. But I like to think of my body as the true home I always carry–to have a solid and deep relationship with it is definitely important.
how can a cat turn into a wolf of insanity *sometimes* I suppose a kitten/wolf(kittenwolf together right?) can during appropiate times see that the world is not flat is what you are saying..? the world also have a language..it also goes into categories like “global subcultures”..etc. supplier goes good and bad..maybe sometimes even both..
perhaps you are too harsh on yourself hence there for also harsh on alot of other thing’s..my thought goes by saing this in a little less enlightened way sir..would the answer be to try sleep it off if it’s intrigrated deeply? I dont know..I just dont know what to say..I’d like to see thing’s with a contrast, all grey, black and white, why that theme? would that make the reality more tolerant for the heart and mind in all honesty? 2014 has shown we are moving fast