Hello HE, I need your help with a project of mine. But before I tell you what it is I need your assistance in, I will tell you the story of how I came to this point. Ill try to keep it brief, but I have a tendency to get wordy(if you’ve read anything by me on here, you probably already know this).
There is a girl who ive been facebook friends with for a couple of years. We arent really friends, per say, she is the younger sister of my really good friends and ive met her a handful of times, and only a few breathfuls of conversation. Shes in grad school to become a nurse, and always posts such beautiful thoughts on FB. Every time I read them, I stop and ponder, and reflect on what is being said. About a month ago, she posted something so profoundly beautiful, I just had to message her. So I did, thanking her for posting such insight into her life and learnings, and I told her she had an inspiring mind. I also left her a short story that I once read about peace and happiness(because most of her thoughts revolve around those things), telling her I owed it to her. She responded soon after with a wonderful reply. She told me that she was beside herself when she read my message, saying, “its a wonderful feeling knowing someone gets something out of what you say.” She also said, “not many people comment on my posts, which usually leads me to believe what i’m saying is not worth all that much.”
That last part hit me pretty hard. At first I thought it was absurd that we live in a world that barely shows its appreciation for anything. But then I took a step back and looked at myself. I’m just as guilty as everyone. Maybe its my upbringing; my dad barely ever told me the words, “good job” even thought I’ve tried my whole life to make him proud. I understand where he is coming from, however. He once told me that “if you tell someone where there ceiling is, they will never jump for the moon.”
But that can not be the only way! We can not ignore the brilliance and hard work of others. But we must not give them a ceiling either, nor should we tell them that they are perfect. Humans are goal driven machines. We feel as if we reach a goal, that our destination has been reached. We should always strive to be better then we are, even if we feel we are good enough. We must always evolve.
So where is the middle ground. The middle ground is showing people that you appreciate what they do, without letting them think that they have reached the top of the hill. So many people tell people they like them, when they really want to say they love them. So many people want to tell someone there style is amazing, but settle on “nice shirt”. We always seem to settle, as if we go too far in compliments, something bad might happen. When was the last time something bad happened when you gave someone an overwhelming compliment? I doubt its happened too often.
I often absorb people words, and let them brew inside of me, melt down my heart and speed up my brain. I sometimes read peoples words, and just think to myself that words can not describe to this person how they made me feel. So as a result, more times then not I just end up not saying anything because I feel my words are lacking. There are so many people out there in this world that I adore that dont even know that I do.
EVERYONE DESERVES TO HEAR THE COMPLIMENTS PEOPLE ARE THINKING ABOUT THEM. Sorry for yelling, I hope I didn’t wake the baby. But that needed to be yelled, because its so very important.
After I finished having a lengthy discussion with this girl from FB about the things I just talked about, we came up with a plan. Here is the plan we have already started, and in the end I will tell you why I need your help.
In the last month since our talk, I have gone to the post office to mail things twice for work related purposes. The nights before I went, me and this girl met up and implemented our plan. It was quite simple; each of us would find 5 random people in this world that we thought deserved to hear something nice said about them. We searched though local papers, online articles, and we even found a couple random people through friends of friends that we had heard did some profound things for their community or for their fellow human beings. The goal was simple; write a letter to each of these people letting them know how much we appreciate them, and let them know(without limitations of being overwhelming), how much we appreciated their existence. Inside each of these ten envelopes, I included 10 stamps and 10 unmarked envelopes. At the end of each of these letters, it said, “Please continue our project, and send out 10 letters of your own to people you think deserve to read a letter. Let them know exactly how you feel, and dont hold anything back. Take care, and know that we love you.”
We have now sent out 20 letters. We didnt include any return addresses. There was quite a major debate on whether we should or not. But in the end, we decided that the person would probably feel they owe a return letter to us, and in the process might forget or overlook sending out ten letters of their own.
Here is where I need your help. I have no idea if any of my 20 letters made it, because of many reasons(wrong address, person moved, through it away as junk mail, etc). This is far too important to the both of us to leave it up in the air with such uncertainty. So this is where you come in. I need 5-10 people to be willing to join in our cause. I am more the willing to mail you an envelope with 10 stamps and 10 envelopes. I would even write you a letter, because, well, you fucking deserve a letter! When was the last time you received a written letter in the mail, anyways? All you would need to do, is find 5-10 people in your community, or your world, that you feel deserve a letter. People that truly deserve some recognition for the work they put into the world. It can even be a person who is raising a family by themselves, a great teacher, a community leader, or even a person who works at a soup Kitchen. It really doesnt matter, I have faith that whoever you choose, will be more then deserving of the letter. All you would then have to do, is tell that person to pass along the message of appreciation. Including stamps and envelops is left at your discretion.
I swear that I wont use your address in any negative way, and after I send you your letter, I will delete your address.
Dont ever let anyone tell you that you are too insignificant to make a change in this world. You are too significant not to.
You use then instead of than… just so you know…
You surprise me, with many of the discussions we’ve had on here I equate you with a person who has very little interest in this, but here you are, going far beyond what I would ever have thought of doing, and really trying to make a difference.
Your writing is a breath of fresh air. Rarely can I read more than 2 paragraphs on this site without feeling like quitting due to the redundancy and repetition.
You’re an intelligent individual.
Since I just kind of half-assed a letter to you already, I’m going to go ahead and do this after this weekend.
Thanks man… this really makes sense.
@ijesuschrist, I feel like we have had our share of mis-understandings along the way. Although I cant remember all of the things we have debated over, a large share of them were corporations, and putting the blame on them for our state of affairs. The major reason I debated this with you is because im sick of people putting the blame on everything else, just so they can take the blame off themselves. Corporations, media, fast food, guns, etc. If we first look and change ourselves, these corporations will have less and less power. I feel like people get redundant with blaming corporations; we all understand how corrupt and evil they can become.
And secondly, sometimes I debate even when I am neutral or in favor of a subject. Debating helps me understand the subject matter a lot more, and also helps me understand my own stance on things and how far I am willing to go to fight for my beliefs. Hope none of it has been too offensive, I try my hardest not to be judgemental and try to represent myself from a factual/logical stance.
But anyways, thank you for the kind words. Ive always enjoyed your blogs as well, sorry if I havent expressed that as much as I should( the reason being, can be found in the above writing). Keep fighting for what you believe in, and maybe together we can grow. Im sick of the way the world is, and never do I feel powerless to change it. Any good done for the world, is good. I feel like a lot of people forget that, and think the task at hand is too large. All it takes is a lot of people trying to do little things, that one day might become awesome. Ya dig?
@yoinkie, Wow! Awesomeness personified! Great, great idea and implementation. I would say, though, for us to say what we feel about someone without placing limits on it. It’s not for us to worry about ceilings and such. Share the love and then let it go from there. Move on. And, give hugs whenever we can. A hug speaks more than any amount of words ever could. Great idea regarding the project. Gonna share it :0)
@yoinkie, You are inspiring, well done! Your words reminded me of a quote I like:
“We know only too well that what we are doing is nothing more than a drop in the ocean. But if the drop were not there, the ocean would be missing something.”― Mother Teresa
You, and the rest of us, are that missing drop ;)
oh yeah not to play grammar freak but it’s per se, not per say. this kinda is like that movie with the kid from sixth sense pay it forward. do something kind to three people and ask them to pay it forward to three people and so on. it was a way to have one person have an impact on the earth.
@jeslyntweedie, @staylucky, @alexunknown, @rickyferdon, @foxmind, @thedudeabides, Please do share any stories of the people you choose to send to! I can never get enough of reading awesome stories about people doing awesome things. I really really hope you all do find the time and motivation to atleast send out a few letters. I can remember so many amazing compliments ive gotten, and they all had everlasting impact on me. I remember my first year english teach who told me she absolutely loved my essays, and told me to continue chasing my passions. I remember all the kind words from my bosses or co-workers, and how much it motivated me to work even harder.
This project isnt just to boost someones confidence for an hour or two. Kind words have the ability to shift people’s perspectives of themselves and the world around them. We gotta let the world know, that we care.
@yoinkie, I followed your lead and private messaged an old friend of mine who posts awesome and inspiring things on facebook. A long time ago we used to be friends but I haven’t talked to him lately at all as life takes its course and we both chose different paths. Now I think we have pretty similar and open beliefs (many of his posts remind me of HE material). Funny how we ended up at similar places while taking different paths. Anyways, I think and hoped he really enjoyed my message.
Thanks for the idea and push to do this!
@yoinkie, GREAT post! I even have these rolls of forever stamps I have leftover from a fundraising campaign years ago– I will definitely write some letters with included stamps and envelopes!
I also wanted to point out the use of Facebook for recognizing/not recognizing somebody’s significant words, deeds, etc. I personally don’t use FB anymore; but I really feel like acknowledgment of all kinds via FB are greatly diminshed, compared to a real time act of recognition.’Like’-ing somebody’s post or even typing out a response is not the same thing as telling them in real life. You mentioned how this girl said that people don’t normally comment on her posts– I remember while being on FB I had a friend who was constantly posting things, and when she had something interesting to say it just seemed so much less.. important? I don’t know. I could go off on a whole FB tangent.. So yeah, makes your idea all the better in my opinion! Cool cool!
@yoinkie, Wow, I just joined this website and im amazed how many interesting people there are here, usually im surrouned by “make money money” people. Me and my friend did sort of similar project, we bought a lot of flowers and went around the city giving them to old ladies telling them they looked wonderful (ok, maybe not that similar). incredible feeling,,, There are so many ways you can make people happy, it is so simple. Id love to join this project :)
@yoinkie Thank you. YOU ARE AWESOME! I will message you immediately after this message, but first I must type my gratitude in this forum. I think we should all start thinking of similar projects and posting them on the open discussion forum. For some reason, I just felt like taking the time to read a fairly long topic and dammit you got me. Kudos!
I try to live my life in such a way everyday. I make time to talk to strangers, and ALWAYS thank service workers, and make sure that I am making eye contact and smiling when I thank them. Even when I am in a bad mood, it actually makes me feel better when I talk to or thank total strangers.
I love talking to people, and I know even though this world is crowded it can often feel lonely. I also always tell my students that I am proud of them and encourage their positive behaviour. I realized today that my students have started especially loving getting high fives from me, after they complete a task they turn their beaming faces to me then reach their hand out. We high five then they smile even more, and I see that they are proud of their accomplishments.
I love seeing people smile. I think this letter idea is fabulous! I may just do it on my own (with my own stamps- they are expensive and I couldn’t accept someone buying them for me). However until I have time or choose the people to send letters to I will go on talking to people to brighten their day.
Talking to people on the bus is one of my favourites, I have heard so many stories- some happy some sad. But I love knowing that strangers feel comfortable telling me such things about their lives. And that after we are done talking they walk away smiling.
However- my bus conversations don’t always go so well. I once had an elderly man try to kiss me on the lips. That was awkward.
The response i’ve received from you all has been overwhelming! You all warm my heart with your desire to help others. We might not change the world, but we can definetly help a few of our fellow humans!
Ive received a few emails and will be sending letters out this weekend. I havent received any international people, however. Anyone in Europe, or anywhere else for that matter, want to get involved? I would be happy to send you a little package as well!