I know that some people might have a hard time with this forum in particular. I don’t care. I don’t want to have an argument about morals. I would like to hear some experiences others have had that helped them understand the best way they get off, male and female.
If you have ever done research online about how to better your sex life, you would know it is hard to find any answers that are not typical and seem to be written by people with little connection to their partners.
Before you judge me for calling on HE for this, I’m just looking for some more genuine answers and am curious to see what will come out of this.
So, what gets you off folks? What makes sex orgasmic for you? And I don’t know what kind of lines we are treading with the HE creators but I’m sure we can keep this respectable as well as interesting.
@araeya09, Hey man, sex is totally cool to talk about.
My best sex was when she was totally into it, and didn’t seem to be able to restrain herself.
Maybe that’s why people like drunk sex so much… Though I think it’s much better sober :P Then you know you REALLY rile them up.
@tangledupinplaid21, I agree with the cliche saying but I don’t think the beginning of a relationship is when the best sex is. In the beginning, it all feels so NEW and that spark of that new body is really exciting but in my opinion the best sex is after you’ve learned eachother. I believe the best sex is when you know exactly what your partner loves…when you know what drives them absolutely crazy and they know just the same. The best sex is poetry. It is the physical and mental collaboration of two souls.
@creativenik, Well that might be the reason why. How can you expect someone else to pleasure you when you don’t even know how to pleasure yourself. Give yourself abundant pleasure and you will have abundant pleasure to give. When you’re not in contact with your own sexuality, then sharing said sexuality with someone else will be like citing someone a poem you’ve only once read.
So get rid of you’re shame, pleasure yourself, find a great partner and become free.
I’ve always experienced good sex. Main reason, my mind and sense focus are on the person rather than the sex itself. And there’s no such thing as best sex. If you’re obsessed and qualify it, worry if you’re doing something wrong or expect anything, you’ll be a turnoff. The story before the actual sex is more interesting anyway, if the story isn’t moving, I’d rather do something else with my sexual energy. Feeling like a happy idiot that doesn’t realize how did that just happen is good only the first time.
“How to better your sex life.” This always struck me as ridiculous as it can possibly get. Seriously. It’s like imagining two couples hanging out and one states they have better sex than the other couple. Absolutely ridiculous. If someone wants to give advice to others like they don’t know where to put the penis, it should be “How to better your empty life”. And if you focus on your life rather than articles for desperate distractions, and start bettering it, you just might be better left having awesome sex without questioning it.
“I don’t care. I don’t want to have an argument about morals.” “I’m sure we can keep this respectable as well as interesting.”
Nothing completely respectable is ever interesting!
great replies guys, and also Sorry I couldn’t resist:
@araeya09, Stoned sex awakens all your senses more, which makes you “enjoy” it more and be more “into it” in my opinion. There is also a difference when you do it with a random person that you don’t have feelings for, and someone that you truly love and care about.
As for me, through my experience, it was “best” when making love while being on psychedelics. It just can’t be described in words. It’s the most beautiful,bizarre, sacred moment you will experience. And it LITERALLY feels like you become ONE. . Eh, like I said, it can’t be described through language. But so far, it was the most beautiful experience for me.
Fuck yeah, I’m stoked on these responses, and the humor is great too.
Anyone been in a long term relationship where the sex was an issue. It never used to be for me. We have been together for over 3 years, and now neither of us have a libido. Everything else in the relationship is great though. Can’t figure out if it’s emotional, physical or some hormonal change.
I am still searching not for a good sex, but for a good connection with some girl, best sex will be just a consequence if we are deeply connected. Beyond the pleasure, my kind of best sex is more related to that notion of two people becoming one person with feeling the same thing at the same time.
CONNECTION = GOOD SEX
@araeya09, I was in a long term relationship where something similar happened (from his end though, I had a libido). If neither of you are willing to try new things (or say you will but never do ) you should evaluate why the connection is gone. Maybe one (or both of you) is questioning your sexuality or attraction to the other. Maybe you quit trying to feel sexy and just feel comfortable, which lowers attraction. Many times libido/attraction is lowered when something else is going on. It may be a symptom of a problem but not the actual problem.
@araeya09, “So, what gets you off folks? What makes sex orgasmic for you?”
-Lots of things, I’m a bit of pervert.
Favourite acts includes stuff like queening and various dominance games. Keeping it fun and humorous is a major turn-on for me, too bad most girls are super boring.
Biggest turn-on though has gotta be women that aren’t all closed down, women who keep it real and genuine and aren’t shy about it. Women who can take it like a bitch or get up there and take what she wants or, best of all, both. Women who have wild orgasms.
Doesn’t get better than that.
Since people keep bringing up drugs, one great piece of advice is to take some opiates together before getting it on. Not a lot, just enough to get that deep mellow buzz and take the focus away from the orgasms (because they’ll be hard to achieve, for guys at least) and make it a long session.
And then when you start coming down and get all itchy you can just lay there and scratch each other and it will feel super amazing.
It’s also a nice addition if you wanna try some harder stuff, because the drug takes the edge off slightly.
@araeya09, My libido is about as strong as a kitten. I really don’t care for sex much, sometimes its like OK. NOW. SEX. perhaps 2, 3 days a month, but otherwise its kind of a drag to take all my clothes off and do all that jive turkey stuff.
Honestly its a turn OFF form me when a girl is very obviously horny, for lack of a better word. When any girl approaches me and its obvious what she wants, I’ve no interest, in fact I’d rather she go away completely. It bothers me: I’m not quite sure why.
I’ve been with my lady for going on 4 years now. We used to be more active, when we didn’t live together, mostly because it was kind of expect. We’d visit each other, and then, uhhhhhhhh what should we do now? Ok, that.
Now since we’re always together, there isn’t the expectation of something to happen, especially with years of “I’m tired” nights and so on.
However, imagine this: if each of us have a glass of wine, I couldn’t be more of a hornball. We both have to have drinks for me to feel anything. If its just me, or just her, nothing. An interesting thing, alcohol. Helping ugly people have sex since.. forever
What turns me on is the attraction made simple! Or when a girl is attracted to you and tries calmly to get out, but she knows she cannot do it. That is a total turn on for me, makes me feel like I am really interacting with the girl, chemistry is between us and makes time pass really fast. Okay, that makes me get confused and do not know exactly when to stop trying to kiss, but fuck! I do not get girls I only search for those who has good taste (cof-cof super confident).
It is good when you can forget about the world with a person by your side to do the same! Sex is a therapy for me because of this, it makes me forget about time and just let it pass, besides makes me to say fuck to other stuff. I only cannot say fuck when we are talking about condoms and not having kids, because this really matters.
@araeya09, I think the fact that everyone has such different opinions on these things should explain to you why you cant get a definite answer… We all have our tastes in life.
@dida, Im a guy and for wahtever reason I cant get it up when Im high… It really sucks because I can be extremely horny and it just wont fucking work. It can be very irritating and embarrassing. But now I know to just let the girl smoke and then I can smoke right after haha.
@ijesuschrist, This is so familiar to me. Especially the alcohol, it is the most unattractive thing when he is drunk and wants some, and I am sober. If there is too much alcohol involved, we both pass out before even thinking about it, or bypass the idea altogether because we know we are both way too sloppy to really get anywhere anyway. But yeah, one or two can get things going.
I guess I am just afraid that our connection will diminish if we aren’t having sex, but the opposite has proven true lately. He is extremely attractive but I don’t think of him as this sexy figure of a man that I want to fuck every time I see him. I see him as someone I respect and am excited to ride this roller coaster of life with. It feels good to know that we don’t need sex to have a fulfilling relationship, and I do miss it, though I am fully confident in our ability to work through this in our own creatively weird way.
@araeya09, @creativenik, Let’s bring Tim Ferriss and the 4-Hour-Body into the equation!
This is one of the chapters he gave away freely and it describes perfectly how to have great sex. Including that men can only facilitate an orgasm (explained in the chapter).
Definitly worth a look or two, especially for the guys ;)